This is something I can relate to very much, Poopie. I am of above average intelligence; the last IQ test I took about 2 months ago put me at 131... When I was a child, I believed that I was born to be an intellectual. I was geeky and nerdy, my idea of spending a good time was to plough through books about dinosaurs and prehistoric times, or to puzzle out the family tree of the Greek gods.
Then I entered my teens, and I slowly lost all interest.
To this day, I sometimes worry about not being very interested in science or arts or history at all; I don't read books, magazines, or articles on sci, I'm not interested in anyone else's art in general (which I know makes me sound like a jerk, but I'm just THAT introverted and egotistical), and I have been unable to produce any significant art of myself for years.
I sometimes force myself to read literature, I listen to the classical music station at least once a week (which is pleasant, but doesn't thrill or intrigue me), but I don't see anything anywhere that leaves me hungry for more. I skim surfaces, but I don't go deep. I have no idea why.
What I do to have a good time now is listen to POP music quite a lot, read Marvel comic books, and watch Charmed reruns on TV and Evangelion and Transformers on DVD.
Despite my attitude, I am STILL planning to actually go to university next year and study biology... I have set up a plan that may help me acquire basic cultural/general/scientific knowledge within that year, but I also know that there is a 50% chance of failure, after which I am not certain what I will do.
Yes, I have at times felt dumber than those around me; on another forum I post on -and even on this one- it seems that most people are stimulating their brains at least somewhat... most can enjoy literature, poetry, have a good sense of their local culture and are following the course of their choice at university. My mother likes philosophy and linguistics, my father was good at physics and painting, my uncle was a walking library. I've even felt inferior for not being able to get myself to be interested in those things that -even from a purely rational point of view- are very stimulating to the brain.
I find that I do not have an explorer's mind that would befit a scientist. I don't have the creative mind that's required for a true artist.
I am not sure if I'm positive or negative about the above, I think I choose to feel neutral about it; I am what I am until I decide to change myself.
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clarity of thought before rashness of action