Wearing a mask

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Empathy is maladaptive if you ask me. I always see people expressing negative emotion, espeically anger. If I could feel it, it would be undeserved. I would be helpless. Emotion is fun to fake, though, because I really fool people. I study affective, behavioral, social and cognitive neurosciences becuase I don't want autism to confine me to a life of inactivity as it used to. I use my willpower to more than its full potential because its potential is unlimited. I have developed certain linguistic styles for certain situations. I act human; I don't feel human. I sometimes feel human emotion when I'm with my loving friend.

My loving friend knows I'm empty inside. My loving friends loves me and stares at me but experiences fear thanks to the amygdala. Not fear of me but of how I will react. I don't act human around my loving friend. My loving friend has emotions.

I was once talking to someone (let's call her Frog) and another someone (let's call her Fish) stopped by. Fish said that I am a strange freak but Frog then said that I'm the most normal person she'd ever met. Now isn't that power?

I must say, it's a b***h forcing myself to respond to stimuli but it has its rewards. I can get whatever I want and I don't have to fall prey to constructs. Have I inspired some of you guys to become like me? Please do say yes. And yes, I do steal. Guilt due to theft is undeserved. I deserve the best in life and most people don't realize that. The few who do realize it can't help me because they'd have to break their moral code as a consequence. Life is a game to me.

Now that didn't make sense.


I am the one who took the third option. Where the options for aspies were "acting normal" and "just be yourself", i made up a third one "become normal from inside and then just be your new self". But nothing changed on the outside. I still see you guys (the actors) as superior, and everyone else sees me as inferior to the actors. And i've spent the last few days trying to remember why did i stop acting? What were the disadvantages of acting? You don't mention them, but there are many, i just don't remember them anymore. All three options are kinda crappy in the end


You sound like someone who has discovered those details about life that while being true, make you a dangerous one. H.G. Wells said that one of the most important things he learned in life was that if you really need something, just take it. It's a good lesson as long as only a handful of people know it, else chaos ensues.

Sorry, Calvin, but you sound like a Grade A sociopath to me