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CaptainTrips222
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31 Mar 2009, 5:16 pm

Hi, I'm knew to these boards. 28/m. I'm not diagnosed AS, but I have every reason to believe I have it. I wanted to ask, does anyone else have an excruciatingly hard time making conversation, and even worse, expressing what's on your mind? I struggle to find the words in even the most basic conversation. I noticed when I was 11 that everybody could articulate fine, except for me! I've had to write stuff down, and I've been doing that for years! Sure I've improved, but I'm still concerned. I haven't met anyone else who's had to do that, or even has the same challenge I do!

Can anyone relate? :?:



Emor
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31 Mar 2009, 5:39 pm

I always sound a lot more articulate on paper, however, this is only since my addiction of message boards started(the majority of things I said were message board replies, so naturally, I developed a vocabulary[but because it was all text, I didn't know how to correctly pronounce some words and text is generally easier in my opinion, you can cut bits out and make corrections, when you physically say something, and if it comes out wrong, you can't go back and quickly edit it]), but I don't feel the need to write out all my sentences to get out my point.
I would prefer a world which communicated via text though.
But to conclude, I guess I can only mildly relate, or relate, but not on such an excessive scale.
EMZ=]



EarthAngel19
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31 Mar 2009, 5:58 pm

I can't speak for everyone else but I sure do. I dread having conversations w/ people. I'm getting better at it but it takes so much energy remembering the "right" things to say that I'd rather just not chat.



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31 Mar 2009, 7:11 pm

Yeah, I have trouble with speaking too. I can start out fine but then I start forgetting what words I was going to say, or I stutter or mispronounce the word entirely. That's when I have something to say. 70% of the time I have no idea what to say.
It's much better communicating through message boards or e-mail.



CaptainTrips222
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31 Mar 2009, 8:40 pm

Yeah, it's tough. If not for writing things down and keeping them for looking, I don't know that I'd have much to say at all. Damn shame it is. But... I'm getting a little better.

As for the writing stuff down, what I meant was, if I heard something I liked, or how it was expressed, I'd jot it down (in private) for later. I had quite a collection of notes, but I chucked most of them. I still do that, though, the writing things down. :D



CaptainTrips222
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31 Mar 2009, 8:41 pm

Yeah, it's tough. If not for writing things down and keeping them for looking, I don't know that I'd have much to say at all. Damn shame it is. But... I'm getting a little better.

As for the writing stuff down, what I meant was, if I heard something I liked, or how it was expressed, I'd jot it down (in private) for later. I had quite a collection of notes, but I chucked most of them. I still do that, though, the writing things down. :D



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31 Mar 2009, 9:00 pm

Your strategy makes sense. Writing's easier than talking; and a nice list of stock phrases to use when your sentence-building is coming up dry is a good idea too.

This seems like a very specific problem--not necessarily autism, as autism has more signs than just that--but probably some kind of communication difficulty. Most likely you have some skill that's on the low side--probably having to do with language, or else with producing spoken words (verbal dyspraxia--i.e., not being able to plan the movements involved with speech very well). You could have autism, sure. Many autistic people do have problems with speaking, either with saying what they mean to say, coming up with something appropriate, or forming the words to begin with.

This is assuming that it isn't something more related to nervousness--if you are very nervous when you want to communicate, it could be anxiety--but of course, a speech/language difficulty would produce anxiety when attempting to communicate, as one is often anxious when afraid one will not be able to do something difficult.


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Tragedyanne
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31 Mar 2009, 10:29 pm

I could have written the first post, it describes me perfectly.

I pretty much just never know how to respond to someone, and when someone talks to me, I don't know how to keep the conversation going, so I think people get bored of talking to me. I also have to carefully plan out what I am going to say, or I usually say things that are gramatically incorrect. It's really quite frustrating.



kaitlyn_loves_music
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31 Mar 2009, 10:38 pm

i guess i dont talk that well.
i stutter & lisp.
but i have a major problem with reading :oops:



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01 Apr 2009, 12:05 am

I have no problems with speaking. I have always been the type of person to articulate & some say that I do it too much, or that I give way more details than anyone needs. However there are plenty of times when I'm not like this & am the complete opposite, usually when I'm around new people that I don't really know what to say to. I usually end up saying "Umm...hmm...yeah" or something similar, but I suppose that's not that uncommon?


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redplanet
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01 Apr 2009, 2:13 am

Yes, absolutely.

Funnily enough I'm very articulate when talking about a subject of interest, but when I'm trying to "chat" I stammer, forget words, get mixed up, and don't know how to continue the conversation. Hradly surprising I had no friends at school :(



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01 Apr 2009, 3:59 am

Yes, I have this difficulty and have to pre-prepare or write many things, though it's improved slightly the last couple of years. The first time I filmed myself practising to give a presentation I was shocked. While doing it, I'd felt at my most articulate, but watching the recording showed I was the opposite. I didn't know about autism/AS at the time, but could see that there was something very different about me. I re-watched it again about a month ago and would put it up to show if it did not hurt to watch.

Callista wrote:
[...] but of course, a speech/language difficulty would produce anxiety when attempting to communicate, as one is often anxious when afraid one will not be able to do something difficult.


Yes, and that's something people don't get; they just say to stop being nervous and the problem will be solved.



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01 Apr 2009, 8:41 am

You may find the Special Silent Forum..... (NV talk) thread useful.


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