Anyone who hates it when routines become destroyed

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We who have Asperger have certain routines that we have made up ourselves, routines that we hate to break and that we love to use. But not just routines but also rituals and plans.


Right now, one of my biggest plans for the holiday has been ruined

And I am Very Very Angry!


Has this ever happened to any of you, well if it have please share with me


It may give me some relief and perhaps some tips

Why and what happened?


Yes it has happened and I have had close calls too. In 2005, I go to my cousin's wedding with my parents and on the way home we were going to stop in Steamboat Springs but my grandmother just had to have a heart attack because my cousin and his new wife decided to have their ceremony and the party at the top of the summit in Aspen, Colorado. So my grandmother had to be taken back down to Aspen and got taken to the hospital and stayed the night there. It was a possibility she might not be able to go home with her husband and my aunt and her bf and my cousins because of her heart condition because of the elevations they would have to drive through so she would have to go home with us and we would not be able to stop at Steamboat Springs. I was very upset. I think I was being selfish because I was so anxious to see the town again. We were there in 1996 and my mother was sick and I swam at the KOA pool for five hours while my brothers did miniature golf skipping the last hole. They would just do the other holes again none stop. So the next day we stop at the hospital to see my grandmother and I got the most wonderful news, she could go home with her family because the doctor said she be okay to go through the mountains. I felt so happy and felt I had never felt that happy before.


So I was very very upset our plans were going to change and then they didn't have to change after all because my grandmother was okay. My parents took the plans well but I was just crying and flipping out. I'm sure they were disappointed. After all lot of people get disappointed when plans change or something happens, it ruins their plans to do something but they don't have a cow or flip out or act like its the end of the world and have a meltdown.

yes hate routine changes sooooooo much, for me this week is spring break and is throwing me off big time, im melting down like crazy, becoming more larthargic, acting very uninterested in everything and headbanging more, ughhh hate vacations sometimes.

For me, it's not so much daily routines as it is with plans in general.

I'll always have a picture in my mind about what I'm about to do next, and it gets on my nerves when something or other gets in the way of that.

I find this helpful. When you make plans make sure you inform them you guys will do it if....


Like lets say you were planning on taking your kids to the beach, tell them you will go if the weather is nice and it's not rainy or stormy or snowy, etc. So the kids will know what to expect that day. So that when that day comes, they aren't so upset when the plans change because you didn't plan for the weather to be nasty. I think that would be helpful for aspies too so they aren't real upset when the plans change because they were expecting the alternate if the weather was bad.

Routine-breaking can be awful for me, if my night routine was broken I'd be very upset. I like to plan my things carefully and if there's a change I may have to be warned in advance.

yeah i have to take a shower at 7:00pm on weekdays.
i used to eat around 5pm but now i eat whenever just before 7pm tho cuz i cant take a shower without food ill faint in the shower.
i think thats it...

It affects me at work. We have certain processes for doing different tasks/projects and every now and then they change a portion of it. I almost always revert to the "old" way and do it wrong once or twice before I finally remember to do it all the time.

When I go places like the local zoo. I have to do things in a certian order or else I do not enjoy it. I must go into the gift shop even if I don't plan to buy anything. Then The birds MUST be seen first. It was bad enough when they demolished their fifty year old aquarium to make their stupid Flordia exosystem exhibit (in Ohio of all places) so why is is so bad to want to see the birds first? My neice and nephews are coming over next month and my mom wants to take them to the zoo and with little kids involved you can't do ANYTHING. I also get panicky if we get there past noon. If we get there past noon, it's not worth going. The whole day is runied. When I go places, I have to have the whole thing planned out and that plan must be followed to a T. Little kids under five are unpredictable enough. I think I'm just going to stay home and work on my art. When people take me there, they usualy know they better go first thing in the moring, and let me see the gift shop and go ahead and let me see my birds. When I was younger, there was some stepping stones near a bridge for little kids to jump on. I had to jump across them with out missing any and land a certian way and be the only person on all five stepping stones. If another little kid was behind me I had to start all over. On a crowded day it would sometimes take over an hour to let me jump across the stepping stones. If I didn't get to do it all alone, I would scream and cry for hours and get very agressive. People soon learned it was best to let me jump across the freaking rocks all alone because if I was the only one it did not take long and was better than having a black eye. I wonder if I am the reason they blocked the stepping stones off? Most people have learned it's just best to let me have my routine because I can get pretty nasty and scary if it is changed.

I used to get a little upset when routines were changed on me.
like during school holidays i would just walk around saying "i'm bored".

I dotn really have a set routine to say. No school so I am kinda whenever. However if you tell em you are coming at 1 and you are not there at 1 then I freak.

I hated school barbecues. They always made me feel uneasy inside and it took me a couple years to get used to it. I even hated it when one of my teachers would skip story time we always had after lunch. It just made the whole time uncomfortable then when we be doing something else instead. I even hated when I was five when majority of the kids in my class not show up so it changed everything in school for me that day. Class didn't go on as normally so we be next door in the other classroom. I considered those bad days. The barbecue, bad lunch time.

Yeah I hate that. Drives me crazy. Of course I don't expect them to be there at one on the nose because that is so hard to do. So I expect maybe they be there a few minutes early before that time or a few minutes after that time unless they gave me a call saying they can't make it or they are going to be late.

Change is certainly something that I have a hard time adjusting to. I like things to stay the same for a while but if a change is really needed, I'll eventually learn to tolerate it. i just need to get over the anxiety first.