Elective mutism

Post Reply New Topic

Today I had an idea, to stop talking altogether at school. That way, people can't twist my words and use them to start untrue rumours about me. And if I write everything I need to communicate in a notepad, I can show people evidence of what I actually said.

And that way people would get the message and quit trying to talk to me.

And if this one b***h tries shouting random insults at me in the corridor again, I don't need to bother shouting an insult back, one rude gesture can communicate everything I could ever want to say to her.

Is anyone here elective mute? Is there anything I haven't considered?

Sorry but I don't think that will work

My response would be "I'm sorry, but you seem to be mistaking me for someone who cares."

If she keeps at it come back with "Why do you keep mistaking me for someone for cares. Are you slow?"

If she comes back again ask her if she would like it in sign language.


Don't let the horrid thing/girl get you down. She is just too insecure in herself and needs to give you a hard time to make herself feel special. Sad really.

That would work for that one particular problem, but that's not the main reason I am considering stopping talking.

It's the fact that people twist everything I say and start untrue rumours about me. And nobody has anything better to talk about, apparently, because the rumours don't die anywhere near as quickly as they did at my old school.

If I have to be honest, selective mutism in your sense will not work. Often during situations like this we try to react in a way that will be harmful to our attackers. Then only do we realise that what we planned isn't working, because it's not benefiting us.

Is purposefully being silent gonna make your life easier? If not than don't do it. It can't be everyone that twists your words around, so if you want to be silent amongst those few that are, that might work. As for the girl being nasty to you: Show her that she doesn't affect you and be even nicer to her. It's crazy enough to work.

Yes, it will make my life easier.

Ah, I think I see now. It's a new school so you are a novelty. Don't worry. Small minded people have nothing better to do than pick on the new kid. I went through it myself when I started a new school (many, many years ago) so obviously kids haven't changed. When someone new comes along I found that they got bored with me and started picking on them.

Don't let the losers get you down

elective mute? No, but I'm selectively mute but I don't mean to be.

I'm pretty much mute at college, and it certainly doesn't help me. In any way.

Rumormongers will be what they are whether you are mute or not. Gossip is a terrible thing, but you know the truth. Be strong in who you are, and don't let them get you down.

Best of luck to you whatever you decide.

Also-- because I didn't talk in school and acted odd everyone thought I was a brain-dead pothead. They'll just make some other rumor.

Kids thought I was a lesbian when I was in high school. These group of girls asked me in my choir class and I said I was not and they said they heard I was. My mom told me it was because I'm always by myself. WTF, how does it make one a lesbian when they are by themselves? How the heck does it give people that dumb idea? Wouldn't I be flirting with other girls or hitting on them if I were? Impossible to tell if someone is or not if they are hardly with anyone.

i took the same path once.but it didn't make life any better.i became more out of sync with society and people and turned to be a freak who don't have minimal communication skill.
you may say you will communicate with others outside of school.but school is the biggest oppurtunity to learn to cope through life.so don't waste time by being mute.it will eventually make one crazy coz people can't help but express their thoughts,feelings.
if you want to get out of the problem of rumours try finding other solutions for this.watch other people .how they handle when people twist their words and spread rumours about them.learn from their strategy.

I disagree with this strategy, if you spread rumours around, surely you're being as bad as them and stooping to their level?

I agree with observing others though to keep a check in case things do get out of hand.

It's just not me to spread rumours about other people.

If someone does say something nasty about me I either ignore them or say:
"Oh that's interesting." and move on.

In my experience, most decent socially competent people are well brought up enough not to spread rumours.

They realise sensibly that it doesn't do anyone any good and is a waste of time that could be better spent doing other more productive things.

I believe that I must be selectively mute or whatever. I still had to force myself to talk when required though, even when it was tough.

It's funny, but in my house, the pace of communication is much more relaxed and interactions are far less social than in the outside world. Perhaps, those that are selectively mute have shy parents themselves or feel uncomfortable in social situations that they're not used to because they haven't had the relevant social experience or the kind of disposition that functions well in overcrowded social settings.

Just a hunch, but I believe that some people just simply aren't built for intense, prolonged, crowded social interactions. Mutism may be their only means of coping if the surrounding social environment is "out of their depths". Perhaps if there wasn't such a strong expectation to be social, these people would be happier.

I was a selective mute in my school days. People still said things about me. They thought I was deaf lol.
Becoming an elective mute won't really get you far. My experience might be a little different, because I couldn't control my mutism, but I never got very far with not talking; no friends, never left the house unless to wander my street in a circle and I couldn't even order my own food.

Agrees with this.

It can make you feel pretty "out of it" actually.

I went MOSTLY mute a while ago, and I think it helped in some ways. I did it because I realized I felt embarrassed after most of the things I said, so it definitely helped with that, LOL. And people stopped paying attention to me, not right away, but eventually, so they didn't go out of their way to bother me anymore. It also made me seem smarter and nicer, I think, because I would only say something if I was absolutely sure about it, and I would never say anything mean. So by high school, I never got picked on at all.