The Brutal Honesty Thread

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Ok, this thread will insult people on the forum and I prepared to take the wrath of administrators.

I am going to be brutally honest in this forum and while I may and possibly will insult other members, it is not intentional. With that disclaimer out of the way have you found out that being brutally honest in say high school misconstrued as oppositional defiance?

Or, perhaps brutal honesty as being mean and insensitive?
Or perhaps brutal honesty as being lack of empathy?

Since this is a topic about brutal honesty and how it relates to Aspies, please be brutally honest and please insult me.

Blah. Honesty is not insulting, dishonesty is. Like "you can't handle the truth" is how people treat you when they are dishonest.

To be brutally honest...

My relations say this phrase a lot.
We don't sugar coat anything talking amongst ourselves.
Lots of satire directed at people who like to "keep up with the Jones'".
We comment on other people's behaviour and consider it strange sometimes saying:

"Why do people..."

Any brutal honesty is very humorous and dry, unless it's an argument.
If any of us have something on our minds we'll say it exactly with no filter.

I thought that everyone talked like this.
I guess I was wrong.

you can be honest and not be insulting. there is no 'either/or'

and currently I don't think of any examples.

oh. *insults op*

If by brutal you mean going out of your way to make an honest statement you’re probably right. I believe that sometimes it is better not to say anything, but if you are asked and you make an honest statement than that isn’t you being brutal but the other person being masochistic.

i love being brutally honest. polish is needed when dealing with this baby

While I am extremely pro-honesty, I am personally against "brutal honesty". To me, the main difference is brutal honesty is going out of your way to say things that are going to be hurtful to other people when it is not necessary.

I knew a bully at school who would constantly tell me how ugly I looked, how I sucked socially, how nobody liked me, blah blah (to be fair, one of the better bullies I had), and then excuse her actions with "I'm just a brutally honest person". She did this to other people too.

Walking up to someone in the street and telling them they're fat and ugly = my definition of brutal honesty, and unnecessary.

Your friend is trying on a dress in the store and turns to you and asks you what you think, and you tell her the colour doesn't suit her and she might look better in red = honesty.

I'm not brutally honest unless they ASK for it. Then I let 'em have it because... they DID ask for it after all. One of my highschool girl-friends (not girlfriend) would use me as a sounding board that way. She appreciated that I always told her exactly what I thought of something.

Consider it a gift -- a clarity of insight, really. But it is a light that SOME others cannot stand to see.

Last edited by ViperaAspis on 15 May 2009, 12:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

I think the brutality qualifier is pretty interesting...
I'm brutally honest when I get to the point where I just don't give a good GD if I hurt the other person's feelings... rather enjoy the sense of superiority and power to be able to hurt someone...

These are not my finer moments, for sure. That's the god's honest truth and I have no room to feel sorry for myself when I become a community pariah after such callous treatment of another person.

Having my mother tell me no one would ever want me, I belonged in an institution, and that I was disgusting impressed upon me the harm and hurt that 'brutal honesty' does. I'm sure she just felt she was being straight with me; these were truths I needed to know.


I'm working on gentle honesty, clarity, and restraint. Not that I've accomplished it just that it's what I'm working towards. But recognizing that my truth is subjective, not absolute, is helpful.

And honestly, this is an interesting subject...

Sometimes I'm brutally honest. I don't walk up to someone and tell them they are fat or ugly or they look like a hobo. When I see a picture of someone, I don't say they look ugly or fat or a hobo. If they asked for my opinion, that's different, same as if a person in the street asked what I think of them. I say what comes to my mind about them.

I've had a long history of putting my foot in my mouth and I still don't get why someone would ask for an honest opinion and still feel insulted by it if it's negative when they've asked for it but I'm actually sort of sensitive so I've learned to sugar coat things a bit. I was never doing it just to be insulting.

sorry, this is a violation of the WP rules, Bozewani. You knew that the mod team (Administration) would find and give you grief, but you can't ask for insults on WP.

this thread is locked


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