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Can you relate to the defintion below of DPD?
Definitely. Most of my characteristics are listed. 29%  29%  [ 10 ]
Somewhat. I think this might explain possible behaviours. 41%  41%  [ 14 ]
No. I am independent and self assured. 29%  29%  [ 10 ]
Total votes : 34

i_wanna_blue
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25 May 2009, 10:42 am

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Dependent Personality: People with a dependent personality routinely surrender major decisions and responsibilities to others and permit the needs of those they depend on to supersede their own. They lack self-confidence and feel intensely insecure about their ability to take care of themselves. They often protest that they cannot make decisions and do not know what to do or how to do it. This behavior is due partly to a reluctance to express their views for fear of offending the people they need and partly to a belief that others are more capable. People with other personality disorders often have traits of a dependent personality, but the dependent traits are usually hidden by the more dominant traits of the other disorder. Sometimes adults with a prolonged illness or physical handicap develop a dependent personality.



Quote:
Diagnostic Features:

Dependent Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by an over-reliance on others that leads to submissive and clinging behavior and fears of separation. The dependent and submissive behaviors arise from feeling unable to cope without the help of others. This disorder is only diagnosed when these behaviors become persistent and very disabling or distressing. This diagnosis should be used with great caution, if at all, in children and adolescents, for whom dependent behavior may be developmentally appropriate.

Complications:

Complications of this disorder are increased risk of: depression; alcohol or drug abuse; physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. Occupational functioning is impaired if independent initiative is required. The individual avoids positions of responsibility and becomes anxious when faced with decisions. Social relations tend to be limited to those few people on whom the individual is dependent.

Comorbidity:

Mood Disorders, Anxiety Disorders, Adjustment Disorder, and other Personality Disorders (especially Borderline, Avoidant, and Histrionic) frequently co-occur with this disorder.



Can anyone relate to this type of behaviour?



whipstitches
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25 May 2009, 11:27 am

I really doubt that I have this disorder, but I do sort of wonder if I could really take care of myself on my own for very long without having some sort of major issue come up. My mother helped me out a lot so that I could remain self sufficient, but now she is dead. My husband more or less has stepped in and "cares" for me. I am capable of working, but I think that more of my issues are explained by traits commonly associated with AS. I met and married my husband a few years before my mother died, so I haven't really had to "try" to make it alone. I guess that is why I don't know if I can do it or not...... :shrug:



Fudo
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25 May 2009, 11:30 am

i didn't read through properly as i can't concentrate atm, but this sounds quite like me..



serenity
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25 May 2009, 11:42 am

whipstitches wrote:
I really doubt that I have this disorder, but I do sort of wonder if I could really take care of myself on my own for very long without having some sort of major issue come up. My mother helped me out a lot so that I could remain self sufficient, but now she is dead. My husband more or less has stepped in and "cares" for me. I am capable of working, but I think that more of my issues are explained by traits commonly associated with AS. I met and married my husband a few years before my mother died, so I haven't really had to "try" to make it alone. I guess that is why I don't know if I can do it or not...... :shrug:


Pretty much the same with me. I don't know if it would qualify as having a disorder if one genuinely has problems with certain life skills. I would think there would be a difference between someone who could take care of themselves, but for whatever reason psychologically they believe they can't. You're not supposed to be able to qualify for a diagnosis of AS unless you have significant trouble with at least one of 3 major areas of life. I guess that it wouldn't make sense to me to get a further diagnosis of DPD, because you have difficulty.

I have often wondered how I'd fare completely on my own. I don't have the support of my family (they're currently not speaking to me for what reason, I don't know) but I do have the support of my husband. I don't have any trouble being able to make decisions, but there are some things that I do have trouble doing that would impact my family greatly if I were the only one around to take care of those things.



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25 May 2009, 12:06 pm

I think I have some of the characteristics, but the "disorder" doesn't fit me entirely.


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i_wanna_blue
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25 May 2009, 1:34 pm

I agree. Most people will probably not be officially diagnosed with a personality disorder but may have a few characteristics especially since it's linked to Anxiety and Avoidant personality disorder.



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25 May 2009, 1:43 pm

Well I definitely can relate to the fear of not being able to take care of myself on my own, but I don't let people take advantage of me even with this fear and don't feel dependent or submissive, just very angry and disappointed with myself. So I don't think I could be diagnosed with this even thought the fear is most definitely there.



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25 May 2009, 2:04 pm

There is f*****g way I have DPD. But sometimes I have this paranoia that certain people are trying to give me DPD, or think that others think that I am not fit to make my own decisions and such. Which makes me feel really sh***y a lot of the time.



whipstitches
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25 May 2009, 2:28 pm

serenity wrote:
Pretty much the same with me. I don't know if it would qualify as having a disorder if one genuinely has problems with certain life skills. I would think there would be a difference between someone who could take care of themselves, but for whatever reason psychologically they believe they can't. You're not supposed to be able to qualify for a diagnosis of AS unless you have significant trouble with at least one of 3 major areas of life. I guess that it wouldn't make sense to me to get a further diagnosis of DPD, because you have difficulty.

I have often wondered how I'd fare completely on my own. I don't have the support of my family (they're currently not speaking to me for what reason, I don't know) but I do have the support of my husband. I don't have any trouble being able to make decisions, but there are some things that I do have trouble doing that would impact my family greatly if I were the only one around to take care of those things.


I agree that not being able to tend to certain areas of life effectively and not "wanting" to tend to your life are really two separate things. You mentioned "wondering how [you] would fare completely on [your] own" and I totally relate to that. My major problem area in life has been employment. I more or less got sucked into the university and stayed there for about 10 years. I am WAY over educated and now have massive student debt, but I have no skills to find work. I had intended to become a professor, but I didn't finish my PhD because I more or less snapped when I learned that my mother was dying. This in turn flung me into a deep depression and I know there is no way that I would be able to function on my own right now. I have a lot of education, but I only have a bachelors degree to show for it. I can't handle the sensory issues that come along with most service jobs and I do not suffer fools very well at all. I would have a hard time being "a team player" in most service jobs. Most office environments have been very stressful because there is an expectation that you will "socialize". I just don't know what to do with myself right now so far as employment is concerned. I have been unemployed for about 4 years now and really do depend on my husband for support. My family has encouraged me to return to graduate school to obtain a masters degree because I was able to get a full scholarship. Since I won't have to borrow any additional money, there really isn't much to lose. I just hope that I will be able get some manner of beurocratic position when I am finished. I have a degree in geology and studied surface water and ground water systems in grad school. Hopefully I will be able to add "extensive knowledge of water policy" to that via graduate school and become a little more employable. This time I am going to see if I can get some assistance finding a job because I don't think that I will be able to do it on my own. I just can't seem to network and I am always looking in the wrong places for work. :cry: I tend to see this is the most severe issue that I have in life because it really is the difference between being able to make it on your own and being a dependent. I would love to have a nice job to go to everyday that didn't make me feel nervous and self concious and antisocial. That is sort of why I thought being a professor would suit me.... it's okay to be really interested in something and no one really thinks too much of it if you are a little weird.



MattShizzle
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25 May 2009, 2:30 pm

Sounds a lot like me.



AnonymousAnonymous
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25 May 2009, 2:48 pm

Sounds a lot like my older NT sister.
The probability she is Aspie is growing by the week.


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poopylungstuffing
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25 May 2009, 3:08 pm

My partner is actually diagnosed with this...or was as a teen..



Lecks
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25 May 2009, 10:14 pm

I exhibit some symptoms but I let others make decisions for me mostly because I'm lazy as hell.



25 May 2009, 10:19 pm

Sounds sort of like my ex.



Michjo
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26 May 2009, 12:43 am

I find it very difficult to choose between things. The apple or the orange? they both scrape down my throat, they both taste like metal, i'll still feel hungry wether i eat or not. I tend to get people to make decisions for me, with no emotional colouring it's nearly impossible for me to pick between two equal things. I'm certainly not clingy and i don't go with other peoples point of veiw to avoid offending them however, i have a tendancy to push people away even though i know i wouldn't cope on my own.



Psygirl6
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26 May 2009, 8:15 am

I have some of the characteristics especially in my 20's and somewhat now. But that did not happen til I was forced to live in a group home,where all of the things that i great at taking care of myself, was "controlled by other people. I was forced into learned helplessness, but at the same time, i was forced to do things and/or get in trouble if I did not show and/or have empathy, sympathy, and/or understanding to the other clients, especially if they were the ones who hurt me.
It is from being "controlled" , when I did not need it and at the same time having people around me lack understanding and be very mean to me where i just gave up.