Interview with an Aspie...

Post Reply New Topic

My longtime mentor and I worked on this video together and I thought some people here might find it of interest.
(I'm the young lady being interviewed )

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pa7_NU-cAjA

This resource is now being used around my elementary/high school district as part of a series of vignettes about educational strategies for people with autism. Yay!

If not for the odd way that you talk, and the way you CLEARLY know people that are like I am, and you say you have had similar experiences, I would NEVER have guessed you have AS.,

Take that as a compliment!

You seemed to come across as affable and gregarious. In other words, a regular extrovert.

BTW I forgot to say. Your five rules are GREAT!! !! !! ! FINALLY! Someone has TRUTHFULLY distilled it down to 5 and publicised it. It is SO simple, yet most seem to discount such obvious logic.

Last edited by 2ukenkerl on 21 May 2009, 10:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.

you talked so effortlessly. teach me, teach me. pretty please...

I have never been able to make eye contact when I talk. It's always been a monotone, and the latter parts of my sentenses usually sound like murmurs that other people have to ask me to repeat.

Do you talk to other people like that as well, or are you just so comfortable with her because you've known her for so long?
I could never maintain eye contact like that while talking at the same time. I could look them in the eyes while they're talking, but if I talk while looking into their eyes, I begin stuttering.
As some people have mentioned here, you come off as perfectly normal... maybe you shouldn't even be concerned about your AS anymore!

I loved that video!
That's going in with my major quote-able folder, like Jim Sinclair.

I personally can do okay with eye contact unless I'm having to describe something, then I look off to the side, because the person's eyes make me forget my train of thought. What I wouldn't be able to do is to mentor another person. That's WAY too social for me. Then again, I'm an extreme introvert. I could probably handle being interviewed, but just barely. And that's me at 41. At 21, I would have been shaking like a leaf and choking on my own words out of nervousness. I was a total spazz!

After watching this, I looked at a few of your other posts, anneurysm, because I was curious about how AS presents in you. I honestly didn't see any signs of it in the video, and even what you say about your experiences about reciprocity sounds pretty typical. Not that I'm saying you can't have AS...obviously you know yourself better than anyone else, and you have subjective experiences that we don't see. But I'm not seeing any hints of AS in your posts, and your online aspie quiz came up with an NT score. So, it would be interesting to hear what it is that lead to an AS diagnosis for you. It appears that you are accepted as being on the spectrum, so there must be something. I'm just not seeing it. (Then again, there are a lot of things that I miss, which are obvious to other people.)

Again, I hope this doesn't sound like I'm saying that you aren't on the spectrum. I can't possibly know that. I'm just curious.

You are incredibly lucky, to have all of those opportunities.
You are lucky to live in the United States.

All I've ever had is negative understanding of AS and people (especially close family) telling me to deny it. We weren't given proper physically provable medical information either about this so called "condition" either. We weren't given any sensible guidance. I guess this is why we doubted it and fought it. They were just told that something was "wrong" with me.

I've been bullied and ostracised because of the AS label, which is why I'm afraid to seek help now. I was seen as a negative label, not as a person. Nobody in my country understands in a positive way, so it's fruitless asking them for help. There isn't any sensible help for women in my country anyway. It made me and my family feel angry that people could categorise me with little physical medical proof.

That's why the word "syndrome" makes me feel upset because of how I was treated and this is why I never use it .

I'm baffled as to how you can talk about this word in such a positive way.
Every time I hear it, given my prior experiences, I feel like I've been punched in the stomach.

I'd have meltdowns or whatever and people seriously wouldn't bat an eyelid or tell me that I had depression. That was because I was good academically: my parents thought I'd be okay if they just let me study alone for years and shoved books and money under the door. I wasn't, so I left education. I just became lonelier and lonelier. It just grated on me not being able to get into groups and seeing everyone else have a good time. Now I'm just an agoraphobic prisoner in my own house.

But then again, other members of my family behave in this way, so they think it's perfectly normal and say that I shouldn't draw attention to myself.

How did you even walk into a shop to buy your clothes?

If you are indeed AS, then my social issues are much more severe, more severe than I realised. I thought I was mild or borderline.

My dress sense, well I don't really have any. If I nobody sees me, I don't have occasion to dress up right:lol:

Wow your a very good speaker, you seem very well composed, friendly and pleasant. You hadnt said that you had aspergers I wouldnt have thought that you did. The only symptom that I noticed is that you were a bit overly precise on the details when you were talking about yourself which is something I do as well. I wish my communication skills were that good.

I think AS makes most of us socially awkward and maybe somewhat socially anxious, but not necessarily anti-social.
It is a lot of the external factors that make quite a lot of Aspies unhappy and depressed.

If she can talk like that, she can definitely walk into any store and get anything she wants, given that she has enough money.

For me, I like to shop for clothes sometimes. I usually look at items on the Internet and go to a store to try them on and pay at the register - not much social interaction. I usually go to places like gap and banana republic. Never went into a fancy boutique though.

I usually wear a solid colored shirt with a knit vest with some bold horizontal stripes over the chest, or a short sleeved plaid shirt with a solid polo shirt. sometimes a casual blazer over a shirt or t-shirt. I'm pretty skinny so I must layer. Print ads tell me what to wear - I'm a walking zombie. I've never been able to wear a suit though.

you don't look like you have it at all.

What are peeps with AS supposed to look like then?

Good video anneurysm. And she might do her shopping on the internet.

good stuff! i agree you seem quite at ease in the interview, but that's a good thing.. inspiring

Agrees.

Genuine bad luck and who we're exposed to.
Nobody's really immune from that.

Also situation.
If you live with disabled relatives in a place that's in the middle of no-where where nothing goes on, it makes communicating and going out with other people (miles away sometimes) much more difficult.

I can shop for basic groceries and basic "have a list, read it, buy it and get out" stuff.

But shopping centers and busy supermarkets...ouch.
There's just too much noise, people and awful music.
I can't concentrate unless someone accompanies me to make sure I don't get lost.

It's very stressful and exhausting.

The women's section of clothes shops is pure hell and I avoid that part at all costs. Makes me wish I was a bloke. It'd be much easier and less stressful to shop.

I was never really invited out by other girls on shopping trips anyway.
Plus, I don't think I'd have been allowed too.
There'd have been:

"Oh it's too dangerous. You'll be abducted by child stealers. You'll be run over. You'll meet one of those horrid kids from school and they'll beat you up. You'll lose your money. You'll miss the bus. The world is a frightening and dangerous place for a poor defenseless little child like you. You can't leave the end of the road on your own until you're 21."

From the family.
Like this inspired my public self-confidence *sarcasm*

They just provided me with stuff, so I never had to buy anything or "endanger" myself. This probably did me more harm than good in the long run. They thought it was the best thing for me not to be killed; avoid horrible people and have a million gifts showered upon me. If they didn't constantly throw money at me, they thought they were being "bad" parents.

Is that being "over protective" or wanting the best?

Thankfully there's mail order and the internet.

I like iTunes particularly.
It means I don't have to go into a noisy record shop and feel isolated/embarrassed/anxious.
I can just pick whatever tune I like (within reason) from the comfort of my own home. It's not like downloads can ever run out of stock either.

I never heard about social awkwardness until recently.
One relative swears that he's Mr Brilliant, but would fit this description. He makes jokes, interrupts, boasts and talks about himself a lot, so just ends up irritating people. Yet he thinks he's the greatest social person that ever lived. So for a while I believed him .

If something's invisible and doesn't ever get mentioned, how's one supposed to know about it?

So uh...wear men's clothes? Most of them aren't that different at all. I do it all the time and no one notices.

Shhh!

Don't give my secret away.

Oh and unisex practical clothes.
Those mail order catalogues are fantastic for those.

There are however, some clothes that I have to wear because I'm female. These cause the most trouble and anxiety when I visit the clothes shop.

Talking oddly? That's the first time someone's ever mentioned that...I talk fairly normally as far as I know. What about it striked you as odd? But otherwise, thank you!

The extrovert thing is also disputable...I come across that way with the right people. Put me in a room of clique-ish teenagers and I'll literally freeze.



There's actually 10 rules, but they had me list 5 because there was a time restriction on the video. Dang. I would have listed them all if I could!