500 ways to get kicked out of any TARGET

Post Reply New Topic

1. Do cartwheels while naked

2. Put a "CAUTION-WET FLOOR" sign in order
to keep people away from any carpeted area

3. Make out with a mannequin

4. Look at a security camera and moon the security camera

5. Pretend the fitting room is the restroom

{Most of these I got off of another site...so feel
free to add on to this list, folks.}

6. Start having sex on a lawn recliner. You don't necessarily need a partner.

7. Scream "Repent Sinners! The end is nigh!" at everyone who walks in the door.

8. Dress like a gang-banger and ask everyone you see to fill out an application to join your gang.

9. Take a photo of the female cashier's breasts whilst masturbating furiously and gurning.

Will someone volunteer to test these?

10. Go to a quiet, secluded area and
have an argument with a lady your age,
then when finished, shout in a bad accent
"NO, I'M GOING BACK TO MY PARENTS!"

11: Dart around the store suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible"

12. Leave a trail of tomato juice, chocolate syrup, or both from the fitting rooms to the restrooms.

13. Walk past a store worker and whisper, "Code Pink, register 5, check it out".

14. When someone brushes up against you, scream "NO! BAD TOUCH! BAD, BAD TOUCH!"

15. Stand in the middle of an aisle and whine like a puppy.

16. Look at a female sales-person's name-tag, and ask her, "What did you name the other one?"

17. Tell a female sales-person, "I'm looking for the new guy - Michael Hunt. Have you seen him?"

18. Take 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

19. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

20. Walk up to an employee and, using your most official-sounding tone of voice, "Code three in housewares".

21. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

22. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to the aisle where the Depends undergarments are stocked.

23. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

24. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

25. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

26. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

27. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

28. Hide in a clothing rack, and when people browse through, yell "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

29. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO It's those voices again!"

30. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while; then, yell very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! A little help, please?"

31. Go into the toy section with a friend and grab a couple of lightsabers and begin the most epic battle the world has ever seen!

32. Dance in the most obnoxious manner you can think of.

33. GO STREAKING!

34. Reenact the dream sequence from any movie that has a dream sequence.

35. Look at a security camera & pick your nose.

36. Put porn magazines in the toy section.

37. Go pee in the fitting room.

38. Flash old people!

39. Steal from someone else's shopping cart!

40. Pretend you're a TARGET employee, make an annoucement
on the PSA and say "For the next hour folks, everything in electronics is free!"

41. Get a buddy and crash into each other with shopping carts.

42. Follow people around and ask for autographs!

43. Have the most epic shopping cart race.

44. Smoke a joint in the restrooms! Remember to flush the joint
down the toilet when finished.

45. Flip off any TARGET employee who approaches you.

46. Declare yourself the "express lane police" and start severely berating anyone who shows up with too many items in their cart.

47. get items from housewares and furniture and set up a living space in the electronics dept.

48. swap all the clothing on the male & female mannequins.

49. open all the LEGOS in the toy dept and start playing with them.

50. get a winter jacket, go to the frozen foods in the grocery dept, remove the shelves from a cooler and climb inside and just sit in there.

51. light a real campfire in the camping dept.

52. Plant yourself at the front door and stare suspiciously at members of the opposite sex.

53. Host a barbecue in the outdoors section.

54. Go around the store, asking if anyone has seen the Target dog.

55. Grab a pair of lingerie and ask random people if they think you would look good in it.

56. Smoke cigarettes in a Non-Smoking Area.

57. Carry a "DEATH TO ALL JUICE" sign in front of a juice bar.

58. Treat all free-taste counters like you would an all-you-can-eat buffet line.

59. Dress up as Adolf Hitler in a Jewish province.