Which Director Should Film Your Life?

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Sofia Coppola

Your film will be 58% romantic, 29% comedy, 60% complex plot, and a $ 43 million budget.
With few films under her belt (The Virgin Suicides, Lost In Translation, Marie Antoinette, Somewhere) as a writer/director, she's already highly respected and connected -- her dad, Francis, directed all The Godfather movies and Apocolypse Now. Sofia's good at making the romantic drama that is your life with poignant sullen moments of introspection. You saw how she stylishly handled Marie Antoinette's life, no? And who didn't have at least a lump in the throat at the end of Lost In Translation? She's already won one Academy Award for her writing, now she'll be the first woman to receive one for directing -- YOUR FILM!

Edward D. Wood, Jr.

Your film will be 0% romantic, 26% comedy, 63% complex plot, and a $ 37 million budget.

Ed Wood will get your film done waaaaay under budget, and will likely make it into a classic film of all time -- for all the wrong reasons. Let's face it, your life isn't terribly exciting to begin with, and it needs some camping up. His resume includes classics such as Plan Nine From Outer Space and Glen or Glenda? He's not afraid to tackle controversial topics, and may insist on portraying a transvestite in your film -- even if you've never seen a transvestite before. He was immortalized in the Academy Award-winning Tim Burton film, Ed Wood -- go see it.

Sofia Coppola

Your film will be 38% romantic, 35% comedy, 61% complex plot, and a $ 48 million budget.

With few films under her belt (The Virgin Suicides, Lost In Translation, Marie Antoinette, Somewhere) as a writer/director, she's already highly respected and connected -- her dad, Francis, directed all The Godfather movies and Apocolypse Now. Sofia's good at making the romantic drama that is your life with poignant sullen moments of introspection. You saw how she stylishly handled Marie Antoinette's life, no? And who didn't have at least a lump in the throat at the end of Lost In Translation? She's already won one Academy Award for her writing, now she'll be the first woman to receive one for directing -- YOUR FILM!

"Roger Corman
Your film will be 8% romantic, 26% comedy, 79% complex plot, and a $ 47 million budget.
An action-complex tale about a complex character that is you..."

Cool. Though after seeing Lars von Trier's Melancholia last month (where he "materialized" some of my dreams), I'd prefer him to film my biography. It could end the same way Melancholia does. He could do it 5 times better now, on a $ 47 million budget (of course I don't think that art can be "bought"... I'm just kidding, cause this is exactly 5 times bigger amount than the one he had at his disposal - $9.4 million according to Wikipedia)

a blind/deaf one.......to get the whole picture!

Michael Bay. I wouldn't feel comfortable with a director filming my life unless I despised his work utterly.

Steven Soderbergh

Your film will be 39% romantic, 18% comedy, 80% complex plot, and a $ 62 million budget.
Filmography: Sex Lies and Videotape, Traffic, Ocean's Eleven, Ocean's Twelve, Erin Brockovich, and various other homemade independent films. He may just want to follow you around for a few months and construct a film out of that. Your humor is either dry or non-existant, but your life is somewhat exciting romantically because you're "bad." At least you'll be surrounded by the best-looking people who will be cast as your friends, who in real life are probably just as good-looking. Then when he wins the Academy Award for your film, he won't have to make anymore "Ocean's" films.

Woody Allen

Your film will be 28% romantic, 49% comedy, 44% complex plot, and a $ 51 million budget.
Be prepared to have your life story shot entirely in New York City -- though lately Woody's been loving shooting in London. Also, your music soundtrack is all jazz from before 1949. Filmography: Annie Hall, Manhattan, Stardust Memories, Everyone Says I Love You, Match Point, Scoop, etc. Woody has released one film per year consistently for the past 35 years. For the past 15 years he's been trying to make films like his older, funnier ones, just like characters in his Stardust Memories film suggest throughout. Scarlett Johansson will star.