Corrupt A Wish

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Granted. But it blows up immediately on attempting to fly downwards.

I wish for a grape (peeled).

Granted. You get a angry peeled grape, after peeling your skin off it says:"How do you like them apples, eh?"

~

I wish for less annoying roommates.

Granted. Your 'room' is a sleeping bag in middle of the Sahara Desert.

I wish apples smelled like pears.

granted, but the apples would taste like pears to



I wish i had a kitten

granted. you now have a kitten with a genetic disorder that makes it grow at five times the normal rate

I wish i could meet my favorite character.

Granted. I think that your favorite character is the Terminator, and he is now after you.

I wish that Amazon would ship my package faster without charging me extra.

granted, your package is now super-heavy and headed straight for your face!



I wish i was athletic

Granted. You are now a great high jumper; however, you are really, really clumsy at everything else.

I wish that I could speak and understand all human languages.

granted, you can now STUTTER and understand all human languages!



i wish i had better self-control

Granted. You've been placed in a straitjacket in a sound-proofed room.

I wish I could speak better Dutch.

Granted... you now speak Fries (a local dialect), which means most dutchmen don't understand you.

I wish the seeds I just sowed would start sprouting (but evolve normally otherwise).

Granted. They sprout all over reality, corrupting it.

I wish I could cross the REBEL YELL Event Horizon.

granted, but you'll be blind and deaf to the whole experience!


I wish i could sing!

Granted. You can now sing like a songbird. You also talk like a songbird.

I wish that my neighbors would be quieter.

Granted. You killed all your neighbors in a drug-induced rage you don't even remember.

I wish our local symphony director would get into symphonic metal.

Granted. He is now wearing a Sousaphone.

I wish that my project manager would get a severe case of diaper rash.