Corrupt A Wish

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Granted. You say "Ni".

I wish for a guilty pleasure.

Granted. You get pleasure from sugar, but then you feel guilty so you workout to work it off.

I wish that I could get to sleep tonight.

Granted. You prick your finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel and fall into a deep sleep, and only true love's kiss can awaken you.

I wish to read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows before I go see it in theaters next week.

Granted. But you don't get tickets to see the show unfortunately. (are you seeing the midnight showing?)

I wish that my computer had more battery life.

I wasn't planning on going to a midnight showing. I wouldn't be surprised if tickets are sold out for the show that day, anyway.



Granted, but your internet connection slows down.

I wish to purge myself of all the anxiety I've been having since last week.

Granted. You're axniety has been replaced with depression which could last for about a month.

I wish I could do the barrel roll.

Granted. A gorilla sticks you in a barrel and rolls you down the street.

I wish that I had a pet gorilla that did exactly what I ordered it to do.

Granted. But it's gorilla mother is owned by your enemy and attacks you to get back her baby.

I wish I wasn't tired.

Granted. But you still have dark circles under your eyes, which means you still need more sleep even if your not tired.

I wish I could read everyone's innermost thoughts

Granted, but thoughts that talk nonsense shall come through the loudest.

I wish to join the Marine Corps Silent Drill Platoon

Granted, but you get fired for no reason.

(Aww man, I wanted to corrupt Maeko's wish...well, I'm gonna do it anyways: Granted. You see all their insecurities and problems, but you can't help them...and you see all their joys and elations, and can't celebrate it with them because then it'd be like: "Hey, so I was reading your mind, and I heard that you go the promotion, no, I am not going to ask you to take me to your leader, hey, wait a second!" )

I wish that I'll be able to run today despite being really sore and maybe already puling a muscle.

Granted, you bump into a hornets nest and they encourage you to run... fast!

I wish French bureaucrats could do simple arithmetic like 1 + 1 = 2.

Granted, but they're innumerate above said number.

I wish I get an A on Thursday.

Granted, you get an "A wot the heck?" written on your exam paper!

I wish for a fish smoothie.

granted, you get a fish swimming in the smoothie.

i wish I could see Albion at least once.

Granted, here is your tour guide:

I wish I was back in England!