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The Really Bad Advice Thread

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SaveFerris
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29 Apr 2019, 10:30 am

Don't Drink and Drive!

You might spill your drink

Fat Mike wrote:
Before you get behind the wheel, just stop & think
You can take your chances
But there's so much to lose
Another bumpy road,
There's so much wasted booze


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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard


GreyGirl
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29 Apr 2019, 10:35 am

Fnord wrote:
1 pair of briefs per month:

Week 1: Wear normally
Week 2: Wear front-to-back
Week 3: Wear inside-out & front-to-front
Week 4: Wear front-to-back & inside-out


Fred from Big Hero 6?


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Last edited by GreyGirl on 29 Apr 2019, 10:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 10:36 am

If at first you don't succeed, just give up.
There's no sense making a fool of yourself again when you can just sit there and quietly mope.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 10:38 am

Don't jog and drink!

It makes your beer all foamy and flavorless.



GreyGirl
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29 Apr 2019, 10:40 am

Always bring your chainsaw and hockey mask with you on the bus.


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Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 10:41 am

The label on the aspirin bottle said "Take 2 Tablets for Headache" and "Keep out of reach of children".

The was no aspirin in the bottle so I hid from my kids in the attic.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 10:49 am

To avoid having to share with your date at a restaurant, spit on your food as soon as it arrives.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 10:49 am

GreyGirl wrote:
Fnord wrote:
1 pair of briefs per month:

Week 1: Wear normally
Week 2: Wear front-to-back
Week 3: Wear inside-out & front-to-front
Week 4: Wear front-to-back & inside-out
Fred from Big Hero 6?
No, my uncle Duane back in '67.



Antrax
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29 Apr 2019, 11:00 am

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make a lemon firing gun and take revenge on anyone whoever hurt you by pelting them with lemons.


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Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 11:15 am

Chicks really dig it when you talk about being a victim.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 11:19 am

Ladies, never be afraid to nag your man.

It'll make him so eager to get you to stop that he'll eventually learn to do what you want right away.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 11:22 am

When frying bacon, remove your shirt so you don't get any grease on it.



Fnord
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29 Apr 2019, 11:29 am

A dog park is a great place to play in the snow.



WildColonial
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29 Apr 2019, 7:46 pm

Antrax wrote:
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make a lemon firing gun and take revenge on anyone whoever hurt you by pelting them with lemons.


I don’t know, that sounds like pretty awesome advice sometimes.

If you have an annoying song stuck in your head, sing it to everyone you encounter.


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magz
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30 Apr 2019, 3:13 am

For autistic burnout, do a lot of new physical exercises. Nothing helps with sensory issues like fatigue and ache in muscles all over your body.


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IstominFan
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30 Apr 2019, 9:15 am

Singing an annoying song might irritate people, but it might be a good way of getting it out of your head-and into other people's. Earworm memory dump!

I actually do find physical exercise a good way to relieve stress.