Corrupt A Wish

Post Reply New Topic

Granted, but such requires electrodes hooked up to your scalp and your computer left on to run an electroencephalograph program that controls your TV's power usage.


I wish I had a time machine.

granted; the publishers of time gave you a washing MACHINE.


I wish my family wasn't so weird.

Granted. Your family is now so boring that you can't stay awake around them.

I wish for a monkey's uncle.

Granted. However, the monkey cannot remember exactly which tree in the rainforest of Borneo his uncle resides so you have to spend eternity climbing every tree to find him.

I wish for batteries that never needed recharging.

Granted. You have some dead, non-rechargeable batteries.

I wish for a steak dinner.

granted; you are served a wooden stake with mushroom sauce...


I wish for a chocolate cupcake with NUTELLA for frosting.....

{no matter what YOU say, you can't corrupt this wish 'cause I just baked & frosted 'em for a bbq tomorrow}

Granted. Your family eats them all before you get a chance to eat any.

I wish for a thrilling ride.

Granted: The ride turns out to be a merry-go-round that plays Micheal Jackson's "Thriller"

I wish my ex could find the right moment to break up with her boyfriend.

Granted. They do it in front of you, and they both end up hitting you.

I wish I could take an extra day off on Tuesday.

granted, you catch a 24 hour bug & are sick in bed all day (thus, you got an extra day off)

I wish for potato salad.

(I don't REALLY want you to get sick, either, ok?)

You get a raw potato stuck in a pile of lettuce.

I wish for some lime jello.

granted...it's in a box at the store right next to the lemon jello & the cherry jello.


I wish I could take a vacation.

Granted your vacation is with a coach load of 70 year old women who just want to play bingo for a fortnight in Blackpool, England.

I wish for my gutters to be free of moss so that the rain drains freely.

granted, all the squirells in your area have a moss eating addiction...once they clean out your gutters they will start begging on the street corner "hey man, can ya' help me get a hit?"


I wish I could have a book published.

Granted, however in the fine print your publisher has entitled themselves to 99% of the revenue from sales although your book sells well enough that you are now a billionaire.



I wish that I could travel through the solar system safely.

Granted, you are with a coach load of 70 year old women who just want to play bingo for a fortnight in Blackpool, England.

I wish people would "get" my humor!