Corrupt A Wish

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Granted. Now you have faster economic recession, smaller income and bigger loan.

I wish I was happy and nothing/no one could get to me.

Granted. You spend the rest of your life in a happy dream.

I wish for for a free cruise to Europe.

Granted! Here's your paddle. Be sure to blow more air into the inner tube every so often and return it by tomorrow! I need it for my pool party.

I wish I never had to do any yard work again.

Granted. Everything in your yard dies. You now have a desert, but you don't have to do any yard work.

I wish for a little bit of hope.

Granted. How about a micron of it?

I wish WP will welcome me back.

Granted. The Witches Penguins welcome you back.

I wish that I was asleep.

Granted, you enter a deep, endless, and dreamless sleep. Forever waiting on a cliche prince to come and wake you.

I wish that my d&d group would get together more often.

Granted, one of your friends invents Star Trek type replicator technology which you can use to supply yourself with food and drinks and rare metals to pay the bills with while you play RPGs indefinitely.



I wish that my wife and I will live for centuries in good health and get to travel the solar system and perhaps even travel to other solar systems.

Granted; by then you will see the end of the world, the end of everything, and by then, you two will no longer have a place to live, and you will live in sadness.

(I'd personally consider this denied personally, though, for your own sake.)

I wish for some food to break the fast.

Granted, your hagis with kimchee & a side of balut is waiting for you at the table.


I wish my cats would play nice.

Granted. They play nicely together, and destroy everything in your house.

I wish for a longer, long weekend.

granted, you get an email tomorrow telling you not to go to work Monday because you have been furloughed.


I wish I had a banana split.

You get one, but all of a sudden develop lactose intolerance.

I wish that my desktops wireless card wouldn't lose half of the packets.

Granted. Now it only loses 49%.

I wish for a cup of perfectly chilled water.

Granted, however, it is supercooled water, so once you try drinking it, it instantly freezes to ice the moment the glass is moved; so consider it denied, since you can't drink ice, anyway.

I wish for an instant fix to all life's problems.

Granted, but it only lasts an instant, and then a new set of problems appear.

I wish for a drinkable, cold glass of water.