Corrupt A Wish

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Granted. However, you will have to sleep.

I wish for a room filled with copies of Title 26 of the tax code.

Granted, you now have to complete other people's taxes for a living.

I wish for a sammich.

Granted. It is moldy and filthy and exudes eldritchly abominable odors.

I wish for eternal youth and life.

Granted, but you're a robot that assembles cars all day.

I wish for a decent video game about dragons.

Granted. It takes place in a sweet setting (in the context of ethylene glycol tasting sweet).

I wish for rational perfection.

Oh, they're bringing back the classic Spyro? Hells yeah.

You're now rationally perfect in an irrational world. Have fun with that.

I wish for moneys.

Granted. You get two pebbles with square holes, redeemable only on Yap (where Y is roughly close to the vowel U).

I wish for The Precious.

I wish for an ice cream cake.

Granted. By logica troglodyta, laganum mendacium est. You get a mendacium.

I wish for a ring made of Rhine gold.

As long as it's an Ice-cream lie with the little chocolate crunchies...

You get a non-magic Rhine gold lipring.

I wish it was time for dinner...

Granted but there is no food available

I wish to be NT

Granted. You are the sum of all humans divided by the number of humans.

I wish for a Joule.

Granted. You think of mind-warping architectures from the depths of the sea. Wa that puddle a brain?

I wish no one else's wishes would be corrupted.

Granted. Only yours are corrupted.

I wish people would make sense when they post things...

[Come back and corrupt that wish!]

Granted. They make all sorts of new senses and another Slaanesh situation occurs.

I wish for a 10cmx10cmx10cm cube of anthracite.