Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, you are now the proud owner of "Cockroaches Our Us." No one comes to the store so you live independently

I wish to visit Australia.

Granted. You will be required to swim to get there.

I wish for all subwoofers to be tuened into dogs that ride in submarines.

granted.....all ur dogs dround

i wish i was a cartoon

Granted. You're now the sound vibrations of the song "I'm in Love with my Car" being played on the radio of a Studebaker.

I wish for fish in a dish.

Granted. It's still alive and you have to eat it.

I wish I had a Stalin clone and a Hitler clone.

Granted, they are now arguing who gets to shoot you.

I wish I had the sex drive of a dog.

Ew. It has been granted. You want to have sex everywhere on posts/poles/peoples' legs.

I wish I had not granted that wish.

Granted, That wish now applies to you.

I wish for the stars in the sky to be blue.

Granted. You now live in a blue mist, so everything looks blue.

I wish that my glasses didn't need to be cleaned.

Granted. They're now all so incredibly depressed that they're going out, one by one, in little bursts of interstellar sobs, and none of them are granting anyone's wishes, so all the innocent children of the world are crying too. Look what you've done.

I wish someone would bring me a nice bowl of homemade potato soup on a tray with a rose in a little vase.

Edit: d'oh, wasn't fast enough!

@Yensid: Granted, but now you're blind because I can't think of how that can go wrong besides that.

I wish that I had a wish. -shot-

Granted, but it was given to you by an eight year old who is obsessed with Halo and cusses as much as a South Park kid.

I wish that there was a super attractive, blue-skinned, pointy eared alien in your house that had a tail.

Granted, it's you.

I wish I wasn't so shy.

Granted. Now you run up to every person you see on the street, introducing yourself, hugging and kissing them, talking all about yourself, and asking them really personal questions, nonstop.

I wish people never got sick or injured anymore.

Granted, but then the population expands exponentially due to less need for money for healthcare, so we all die of famine and water shortage. Fun.

I wish our two dogs could live for as long as humans could.

Granted. People's life spans shorten to those of dogs.

I wish for the stars in the sky to be happy again.