Corrupt A Wish

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People admire your ability to chew fingernails most.

I wish labor unions were more efficient.

granted, and corporations fall under your grace, and so does the economy. without greed there is no progress.

i wish, that my life was full of love with the mate of my choosing.

Wish granted. After all, you really imrpessed me on our date.

I wish that progressive metal did not have showoff high pitched vocals.

Granted. The high pitch vocals are now sung throughout and are the norm rather than showing show.

I wish clouds moved like the wax in a lava lamp

Granted, but now the weather is constantly changing, and you get wet and and sunburned.

I wish for Christmas in August.

granted- and for x-mas YOU get a sunburn

i wish i wish i hadn't sat on that fish

Granted, but instead you sat on a small set of spikes.

I wish I hadn't overslept this morning.

Granted, you didn't oversleep this morning, you've actually slept for 48 hours and isn't the day you think it is.

I wish for a pet barnacle.

Wish granted, but it soon becomes a parasite on your body.

I wish Shaquille O'Neal was a good actor.

Granted, but I've still never heard of him!

I wish I understood what everyone was talking about.

Granted, but then you become a clone of everyone else around you constantly.

I wish I could levitate.

Granted, but you're hit by a landing 747.

I wish my bank account had an infinite balance.

Granted. The bank dissolves, with you losing all your money.
I wish to transpond to wherever i wanted to go.

Wish granted, but oil leaks into the ponds (I assume transpond means to go between ponds.)

I wish I had the power to destroy antimatter.

Granted, but someone comes in and flushes. Additional details available upon request.

I wish there was more exploration of resources in the oceans.

Addtional details please.

Wish granted, but it causes an nternational submarine shortage.

I wish the devil was real