Corrupt A Wish

Post Reply New Topic

Granted, but you get attacked by a giant gorilla at the top.


I wish I was the greatest musical genius the world has ever known and was part of a well-loved rock band.

Granted but you do drugs later in life.

I wish I can have some ice cream.

Granted, but it's worm flavored ice cream.

I wish I could have some more free time to do whatever I wanted without guilt.

Granted. You are locked up, but you can do whatever you want to do, inside of your cell.

I wish for the secret of life.

Granted. You have learned the secret of life but now must spend the remainder of your very long existence on the run from nefarious government agencies who wish to take the secret from you by any means necessary.

I wish somebody would make me a coffee. No milk, two sugars.

Granted; they make the coffee but trip before they get to you and consequently spill the coffee all over your best business attire.

I wish that parents and children could live in harmony.

Granted. The Children have control of the parents.

I wish you got a baby kobold to take care of from Chitheria Tempus.

Granted, but as this genie doesn't know what a kobold or a Chitheria Tempus is you got a baby tiger shark to take care of instead and when you went in the water to feed it it unfortunately tore off and ate your foot.

I wish I could eat anything and never get sick from it/have an allergic or intolerance reaction to it or gain any weight.

Granter. You are now the lamest superhero in the Legion of Superheroes: Matter Eater Lad

I wish People would only speak the truth.

Granted. You get a bunch of religious people preaching their version of the truth to you.

I wish jalapenos weren't so spicy.

Granted. Now they are tasteless.

I wish I could teleport into the real world characters from other fantasy worlds.

Granted. Now the world is overrun with My Little Ponies and Teletubbies.

I wish for a bottle full of good luck.

Granted, but you drop it and it breaks.

I wish for something to do all day whilst everyone except me is at school.

Granted, you spend all day trying to open a broken door.

I wish for a happy birthday

Granted, but it sets up a high expectation and birthdays for the next 10 years all seem terrible by comparison.

I wish I could speak foreign languages.

Granted. Your next birthday will be very happy. It will also be your last. Muhahahahahahaha!

Edit: Too slow. Ok for the foreign language wish:

Granted. You are now able to speak Cornish allowing you to communicate with roughly six hundred people, all of whom also speak English.

I wish for a nice new house with all bills paid.

edit again: reworded.