Corrupt A Wish

Post Reply New Topic

Granted, but then you will always smell like garlic.

I wish other people could see what I see.

Granted but they'll see everything you see all the time. No privacy anymore. If you see it, the world sees it.

I wish to never have uplink implant that makes me accessible all the time (like you see in some sci-fi).

Granted. You get a shut-down implant, which makes you shutdown-able at any time.

I wish I could have a huge round of applause.

Granted. *applauds like a maniac*
Just know that I cheered at gunpoint though, so it wasn't sincere.

I wish I had an admirer.

Granted! You do, but your admirer turns into a stalker.

I wish math would solve its own problems.

Haha! Yeah, if only! Granted, maths solves its own problems and all those nasty sub-categories of maths will never need to be learned by another maths hater ever again. Sigh! Now everyone can spend time on things worthy spending time on instead of sweating over a piece of seemingly unsolvable and incomprehensible maths.

I wish I could come up with a single negative thing about maths solving its own problems.

Wish granted but you will always be negative
I wish people had better attitudes.

Granted! They are better, but not by much.

I wish my stuff would magically put itself away.

Granted. You stuff magically puts itself away. Guess what? You're now unable to find any of your stuff because it's so well hidden.

I wish the era of glam rock was upon us once again.

Granted. Glam rock returns. With its peculiar clothes, it’s greatly associated with the LGB movement for some people. The Westboro Baptist Church arranges protests at every glam rock concert they learn of, and soon concerts turn into street fights. The good news: WBC is finally gone, with the surviving members put in mental institutions where they belong. The bad news: After the next election GOP outlaws glam rock in the US. And it didn’t even last long.

I wish I could’ve met my great-grandmother.

Granted. You meet her when she has just been conceived, and is busy undergoing cell division...
...you don't exactly have a stimulating conversation.

I wish my house could tidy itself up.

Granted. Then it kicks you out for making the mess in the first place.

I wish I didn't have money problems.

Granted! You have no financial issues whatsoever, however, you have problems in every other area of your life.

I wish for it to not be bad bad weather this weekend like the forecast says it will be.

Granted. The weather is lovely but you won’t have time to enjoy it, you’re far too busy trying to find all the stuff that magically unpacked itself and ran off to hide.

I wish I had remembered to take bread out of the freezer yesterday

Granted! You remember, but it some weird reason the bread takes a whole week to defrost.

I wish someone would to my grocery shopping for me tomorrow. I really don't feel like going.

Granted. You talk someone into going for you, and they return with a bag full of delicacies: Rat poison, chlorine, detergents, lye and a bar of soap. Don’t eat it all at once!

I wish I had something easily available that I could eat.