Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, but it will be aggressive, and your dog kills all your neighborhood pets. Your neighbors want your dog destroyed.

I wish I hadn't spilled half a bag of walnuts just know when I was trying to get them open to make a cake for Thanksgiving tomorrow.

Granted, but then you'll spill half a bag of sugar on the floor. Sorry about your walnuts.

I wish I had a pastrami sandwich right now

Granted, but it'll be gone before you know it.

I wish I wasn't so pessimistic!

Granted. Now your glass is half-full.

I wish I didn't have to eat.

Granted, but if you don't eat, you'll end up passing out, falling down and hitting your head on the floor. You have a concussion all because you didn't eat.

I wish I didn't have to take any medication for my health.

Granted. You no longer have to take medicine, but now you have to streak down the highway nightly dressed as a leprechaun in order to maintain your health.

I wish I had a boyfriend.

Well, that's different.

Granted! You have a boyfriend, but he doesn't treat you right. He turns out to be quite abusive not only physically, but mentally as well.

I wish to not have to dress up as a leprechaun in order to maintain my health.

Umm ... how are you supposed to streak while dressing up as anything?

In any case, your wish is granted. You're as healthy as a horse. Literally, because now you are a horse. But you'll have to run race after race after race to maintain your usefulness in being alive. Here's some music to help you:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoHECVnQC7A[/youtube]

I wish for a large Bavarian chocolate cake.

But that's the only thing that works!

Granted! Now in order to stay healthy you have to go to the main street during rush hour and stumble around in a chicken suit while you go buck-buck-buck. You have to do it during both morning and afternoon rush for it to work. Aren't you glad the public humiliation is over?

I wish I could find a real pixie

.....Sorry I wasn't quick enough.

Granted. The Magical Animal Pixie comes and turns you back into a human. Unfortunately, you still have to go back to your old job of being dressed up in a chicken suit going buck-buck-buck in front of always-cheerful commuters. You're welcome and you're welcome.

Plus, now there's one less horse in the world. The Magical Animal Pixie is sad, and is searching for another animal to take it's place. Now, which animal will volunteer...?

Oh look, here comes a turtle in search of a pixie. Talk about timing!! !

I wish I had a meringue pie to throw at someone's face.

Granted but... Stop looking at me like that... Hey, no no no no! I am not a target! Do not come any closer.... I gave you the pie, don't be so ungrateful.
*starts to run*
*chances a glance backwards; he's too close*
Tchk! *hides*


I wish Murihiku would throw it at someone else instead

Granted. He throws it at Shikari instead, who catches it neatly in her trunk, takes a large bite of it and lobs the remainder back at Murihiku.


I wish I could remain on holiday leave for three months more.

Granted, you have 3 months more. You will spend it being part of Animal Planet's Meerkat Manor series.


Skilpadde just remembers that she is a horse now, so she chases the pie soiled Murihiku (nice catch and throw, Shikari!) for a while. She nibbles a piece of pie off of him, whinnies and takes off like the wind

well, being a race horse came in handy now, but I wish I was a turtle again

Granted, you are a turtle. But now you have an itch on your back and you can't reach or even flip yourself over to scratch it. Poor turtle.

I wish the pixie would turn me into an NT with big muscles and a sports car.

Granted. You don't know your new strength is and you ruin the car when trying to open the door.

I wish to live on a deserted island that provides full shelter and a life's worth of food and fresh water.