Corrupt A Wish

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Wish granted, but the point you were working so hard make with said book will be missed by the general public and even some intellectuals will miss it too.

I wish it was tuesday right now.

Granted. It is now 12:00 am on Tuesday forever.

I wish authors would portray autism more accurately in their books.

Granted. No NT will understand what is written.

I wish stores were not so crowded.

Granted. They soon have to close down due to lack of business.

I wish my Internet would never go offline again.

Granted. You are stuck with the 2006 version of it.
I wish it were snowing.

Granted. No historian can agree on what exactly happened that day, but the results were catastrophic. Some say president-elect Trump caused a panic in Russia with an ill-worded threat they took as a declaration of war, others say it was an error in an alarm system somewhere. When night fell, an eerie silence came with it. The streets were empty and not one light could be seen throughout the cities. In underground shelters, people huddled together, taking comfort in each other as they had lost everything else. Above their heads, in the midst of the ruins, the first snow of nuclear winter fell.

I wish I had the cash to pay my late bills.

You have the cash, but you are unable to move them into a bank account, forcing you to store them in your own house, where dollar bills are stacked up everywhere. You are literally swimming in money. It will cause a lot of distress for you, and your friends won't like you because they see as an arrogant rich eccentric.

(Hope you pay the bills btw)

My wish: Have the time and energy to travel around the world

Granted. You have the time and energy, but not the money.

I wish more people on Tumblr would reblog my posts.

Granted, you're forced to produce NSFW crap content.

I wish enough money.

Granted. You have enough money to buy a gumball.

I wish Christmas was decommercialized.

Granted. Christmas is all about spending the day digging ditches and lugging heavy stones.

I wish my brother wouldn't yell so often.

granted. sits in your room all hours of the day, follows you and stares at you menacingly, all while saying not a word.

i wish my name was Verderd Cirrhwol.

Granted, if you can handle jokes about it sounding like a disease, cirrhosis of the liver!

I'm going to regret this, but I wish I could go to a tennis tournament

Granted but you are killed in a tennis riot.

I wish I had a time machine.

granted. you are now in possession of front row seats to witness the heat death of the universe.

i wish my name was "bevakasha laetitia horvat".

Granted. However, Bevaskasha is actually the name of an evil genie, so whenever someone says its name in vain (aka, whenever someone says your name) a fairy dies somewhere.

By the time you are nineteen years old, all of the fairies in the world are dead.

I wish I could have a Rockruff!