Corrupt A Wish

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Granted! You're diagnosed with schizophrenia.

I wish they'd stop puking all over the backyard.

Granted. They're crapping all over the backyard. (Why the hell are they trying to get all acked up on milk anyway? haha)

I wish I weren't so dang hungry.

(they're high. i dunno.)

Granted! You eat mushrooms.

I wish I wasn't so damn stupid.

Granted. You're too smart to function.

I wish you would admit to being totally jealous of my cheesiness.

Wish not granted, I will never admit that!

I wish you realized how truly cheesey I am.

Granted. But I bet your cheesiness is no match for my cheesiness.

I wish I had fondue.

Granted! But it's burnt and tastes like dried up french fries.

I wish to remember to charge my iPod.

Granted, but then you forget again.

I still wish I had good food. I haven't freakin eaten in like, 9 hours.

Granted! But it doesn't satisfy your hunger.

I wish for better social skills -_-

Granted, but those are the only skills you have.

I just wish I had skills, period.

Granted! You can sing like william hung.

I wish I didn't have work tomorrow.

Granted. You have school tomorrow.

I wish the books I want to read came out sooner.

Granted! They already came out and you accidently read spoilers on them.

I wish I was still into writing.

Granted. You write works of crap.

I wish people would stop judging me.

Granted! There's no people for you to worry about being judged by.

I wish you lived in Seattle. -.-

Granted, but you live in China.

I wish there was never any traffic.