Corrupt A Wish

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Hesitantly granted, but you accidentally stab yourself.

I wish I could cook.

Granted! You can cook Liama beans.

I wish for my cell phone to stop vibrating.

Granted, it doesn't work at all.

I wish I had liama beans to cook.

Granted! The can explodes and the lid slices your throat open.

I wish for senior project to be non-existant.

Granted, but you have to do more community service.

I wish I had pot stickers.

Granted! People now accuse you of being a stoner.

I wish I had some skittles, or a grape pixie stick.

Granted but people accuse you of snorting the pixie stick.

I wish I had Swedish Fish.

Granted, it's fish straight from the atlantic ocean off the coast of sweden. Raw.

I wish for my cat to not smell like marijuana, courtesy of my brother... -.-

Granted, it smells like his friends puke.

I wish I had an MSN messenger thing.

Granted! You download it and it causes your computer to catch a virus that causes it to explode upon the next time you turn on the computer.

I wish my back didn't itch so much.

Granted! Richard Simmons itches it for you.

I wish my dad didn't stress me out so much.

(i lol'd at your corruption)

Granted! Your mother stresses you out .01% less instead.

I wish for Rammstein to make more music asap.

Granted, but they do a collaborative performance with Britney Spears.

I wish SunChips weren't scratching my throat right now.

Granted! Richard simmon's privates are instead.

I wish for Simon Pegg to make a new movie.

Oh God. You had to say that.

Granted, but it kind of sucks.

I wish my cats would stop playing right near the edge of the loft.

Granted! They fall off and die.

I wish for a new baby kitten.