Problem and "solution"

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I just set the bomb under your couch it's going to blow in 1 minute.
I have a lot work to do today. so I have no time to lurk posts in this planet but I want to but it's not possible..so how can I forget this site for 8hours?

Solution -- Just think how much we suck for not coming up with a solution before the eight hours are gone.

Problem -- I can't stay here a minute longer right now.

Solution: think of the scariest thing in your life, and your minute will become an hour.
Problem: I'm out of bacon(end of the world, I know).

Solution: Help yourself to some from this thread, viewtopic.php?t=290762
Or this one, viewtopic.php?t=269029


Problem: I'm in my local library at the moment, using a computer. What can I do about the noisy, misbehaving half-witted children and adults in the same room, who are making it so difficult to concentrate?

Solution: be noisier than them, usurp dominance!
Problem: there are too many idiots in the world, how can we brighten them up?

Solution: Light off some fireworks near them. Then they'll be brighter and funnier.

Problem: North Korea.
(Yep, how would you solve this problem?)

Solution: just nuke it, nobody will miss those commies.
Problem: South Korea says it's being bullied by North Korea, but nobody believes it. How can I get South Korea to stop complaining to Obama about this?

Solution:Give it a good spanking

Problem:I can't think of a problem.

Solution: use the problem-inventing machine.
Problem: your dog barks loudly and hurts my hearing.

Solution : Plug your ears with sound proof ear plugs.

Problem: If my boyfriend has a girlfriend what to do?

Solution: Do what Monica and Brandy did in the 90s.



Problem: Forum threads I like keep going dormant.

Solution: Write something funny to add to the thread, or deliberately irritate someone ]

Problem: The moon is not bright enough to light up my room at night

Solution: Slap it until it learns to shine better.
Problem: I posted on this thread and now it's going to fester at the top my "recent posts" list.

Solution: Play the word games, and it won't fester long.

Problem: There are people who think Porky Pig is kosher.

Solution: Convince them all to convert to Islam.

Problem: I have the same thing for lunch every day.

Solution : Switch it up for breakfast.

Problem : My brother teases me all the time.