The Really Bad Advice Thread

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If your stomach hurts, drink a liter of sulfuric acid.

To hide the bones of your enemies, dissolve them in pure Deoxyribonucleic acid.

(Note: the reference to "bones of your enemies" is strictly rhetorical. I would never harm anyone, and neither should you!)

take your turns really wide on blind curves.

floor it, especially when you're angry with someone in the car.

Don't forget to give your motherboard a good scrubbing with soapy water when it gets dusty.

When repairing your computer, never forget that every daughterboard needs a motherboard and a fatherboard.

If you have an ear infection, go swimming in the most chlorinated pool available, and dive underwater a lot without earplugs. The cool water will sooth the pain while the chlorine will kill all the bacteria inside your ear.

If you want to be cured of autism, drink bleach.

Make a forced hill start with a car known to have worm gear mounted.

If your hamster is ill, bury him in the ground and leave him there for 50 years. After that, dig him out and he'll be healthy.

Always drink plenty of alcohol before a big athletic event. It will calm those pre-race nerves.

Go outside wearing only shorts and T-shirt during the winter.

The best cure for boredom is to call the FBI and tell them you are about to blow up the White House.

Yahoo Answers is a font of profound wisdom and literacy. You can hardly do better to resolve life's most burning questions than to pose them to the erudite scholars there.

Potassium cyanide is the best cure for flu.