Corrupt A Wish

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You get exhaustive 24-hr pro-privacy media coverage, but the press can't get any stories about it. There is a complete media ban on pro-privacy.

I wish for a method of remote-troutslapping to punish people who forget to post wishes!

Granted, and you have just been slapped since no corruption of previous wish.

I wish more people wrote without the use of the letter "E"

Your wish is granted, but they start forgetting to post corruptions to the previous wishes.

I wish hot chocolate were fat- and calorie- free.

Granted! But it now tastes...bland.

I wish I could be on The Price is Wrong.

Granted, but now water has 1000 calories per 8 ounce glass, and it is all you can afford.


I hope there are lots of participants here in the games today.

Wish granted, but they are the mods shutting us down for having too much fun.

I wish my fiance's fiance visa would be approved in an expedited fashion.

Granted, but now he wants to marry someone else.


I wish someone would invent really cool hearing aids with dinosaurs printed on them.

Granted, they are indeed cool - they have a chiller unit attached to each one and are plenty big enough to have pictures of dinosaurs on them. Trouble is the mains electric lead means you can't stray far from a power socket.

I wish I didn't need to keep switching between different pairs of spectacles (one for reading and one for distance)

Wish granted - as your eyes have been plucked out by hungry crows, you no longer need any spectacles at all.

I wish I could easily lose 10 pounds without the help of a devastating disease, tapeworms, or famine.

Easy to lose ten pounds. At today's exchange rate that is around $17. Put a check in the post addressed to me

I wish it was Friday

Granted. But for some odd reason, you have switched bodies with Ash Ketchum. Have a freakish Friday.

I wish I could build a working Pokémon capturing device.

Granted! But there are no pokemon to capture with it

I Wish I could have

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check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted. Lateral tilting mechanism zealously misfunctions one out of every three tiems, throwing you onto the floor, usually, it seems, on an angry chihuahua.


I wish my son would fall asleep earlier at night....

Granted. But as soon as he falls asleep he starts mumbling eerie phrases in Aramaic.

I wish aspirine had an instantaneous effect.