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The Really Bad Advice Thread

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mezzanotte
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09 Jul 2014, 4:02 pm

The piñata game is a lot more fun if you blindfold all the kids, arm them with Louisville Sluggers, and let them all play at the same time.



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09 Jul 2014, 4:09 pm

Always stick your hand inside any shoe you haven't worn for awhile -- especially if it's been in a closet -- to check for poisonous spiders.


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jrjones9933
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09 Jul 2014, 4:15 pm

To earn the respect of your subordinates, yell and curse at them at every opportunity.



VegetableMan
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09 Jul 2014, 4:22 pm

When you're in a fast food drive-up window, and the order isn't being processed fast enough to suit you, honking your horn will speed things up.


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smudge
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09 Jul 2014, 4:37 pm

Pyroclastic flow heading towards you? Just duck and cover.


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VegetableMan
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09 Jul 2014, 4:45 pm

If you eat broccoli with baked beans, you won't become flatulent.


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What do you call a hot dog in a gangster suit?

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Last edited by VegetableMan on 09 Jul 2014, 4:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ThetaIn3D
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09 Jul 2014, 4:48 pm

Cream soda and chilli paste are the perfect combination for an upset stomach.



Campin_Cat
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09 Jul 2014, 5:09 pm

mezzanotte wrote:
The piñata game is a lot more fun if you blindfold all the kids, arm them with Louisville Sluggers, and let them all play at the same time.

LOLOLOL TOO funny!! ! I truly was LOL!! !


SHOCKING, but it really IS okay to fly a kite in a thunderstorm.



mezzanotte
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09 Jul 2014, 5:34 pm

Cover yourself with sneezing powder before stepping into the dentist's office.



VegetableMan
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09 Jul 2014, 5:48 pm

Tabasco sauce works wonders on almost any fabric stain.


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09 Jul 2014, 6:11 pm

No home really needs a water heater..

Save money....just turn it off.


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Prof_Pretorius
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09 Jul 2014, 6:15 pm

When at the airport and those pesky agents are asking you nosy questions and poking through your carry-on luggage, just slap one of them. They'll respect you after that.


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VegetableMan
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09 Jul 2014, 6:19 pm

Quote:
When at the airport and those pesky agents are asking you nosy questions and poking through your carry-on luggage, just slap one of them. They'll respect you after that.


Making jokes about bombs in your luggage will bond you to them, as well. They have quite the sense of humor.


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ThetaIn3D
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09 Jul 2014, 6:26 pm

Similarly, while in flight it is advisable to meander around the cabin poking people, and asking them if they are the air marshal.



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09 Jul 2014, 6:27 pm

When boarding a flight to Ireland, be sure to wear a beret and dark glasses.



Campin_Cat
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09 Jul 2014, 6:31 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
When at the airport and those pesky agents are asking you nosy questions and poking through your carry-on luggage, just slap one of them. They'll respect you after that.

ROFL----I LOVE it!! !



If you lose electricity during a thunderstorm, checking to see if the power is restored yet, is a simple test: just stick your finger in any light socket----it helps if you wet your finger first.