Corrupt A Wish
tektek
Bronze Supporter
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Joined: 24 Nov 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
^^ oh dear, i grow an afro, complete with floral adornment, and succumb to weed for want of exploring musical creativity? ... must not stray from keyboard! lol
...but seriously, you make a good point in drawing comparison between keyboard proficiency and playing piano... i had not thought of it like that, thank you
~
i also find myself wishing that cats and dogs could talk, so i am sorry to do this...
your wish is granted, but with their new capacity for verbal communication dogs and cats soon establish almost absolute control over humans... interpretation of meows, purrs, and playful barks is open to error where verbal communication is capable of getting the message across.
say you don't want to buy a new cat-nip toy for "chairman meow" or a new chew toy for "fluffy destroyer of worlds"? no time for a belly scratch? no time to scratch behind ears?... prepare to be held to ransom for all the seemingly innocent things you used to do in front of your pets... like walking from the bathroom to your wardrobe minus a towel... sitting on the toilet while they are in the room... or farting while sat next to them on the sofa... omg! (hehe)
...your sweet little feline and canine companions may lack the capacity to type or dial a telephone number, however mashing a keypad to get directory assistance and request animal welfare is a breeze. double x
hehe
~
i wish i could rewind and pause life as necessary.
(yes, sort of like the Adam Sandler movie "Click" (link)))
_________________
"see without looking, hear without listening, breathe without asking" - W.H Auden
your wish has been granted, yet soon you will wish to travel back in time and reverse it.
the disaster of being able to pause and rewind time means you get everything you want, however the furious pace at which you work out categorically how to grant your OWN wishes backfires when everything stops working. The play button on your remote has been mashed beyond recognition or function, and you are therefore eternally fated to either a completely frozen world or to gradually going further and further back in time. Kind of like creating your own black hole.
I wish that I didn't get told off by admin in the middle of the night for having a silly long signature. Surely 6 lines is not enough for some people.
tektek
Bronze Supporter
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Joined: 24 Nov 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
i was actually wanting to ask about your signature... its origins and significance to you but then it was gone
(so i hate to do this...)
granted, but due to the rules on signatures being relaxed soon enough all the wonderful inhabitants of this wrong (but oh-so excellent) planet begin to include vast swathes of text from classic literature, entire transcripts of plays and operas, and pages and pages of quantum theory... the WP servers begin to crumble under the excessive load of carrying so much extra text with each individual post... and WP goes offline
hehe
i wish that i had been up early enough this morning to exercise (especially after such a big lunch)
_________________
"see without looking, hear without listening, breathe without asking" - W.H Auden
Yes, yet your form of exercise does generally involve heaving rocks from your roof to strengthen your arm and typing muscles, which this morning would have meant the party revelers still there from last night would have been killed
Your corruption actually made sense.
Re signature: Yes, well do ask, I mean, I'm obviously doing wrong planet for Christmas break this year, so..
My signature was just something I scribbled (well in this case typed on the laptop) when I had a bit of insomnia and woke up at that glorious time - dawn. There's always birds outside my window and they talk a lot more when no one's around (I relate )
I wish that (although I love theory) I was a girl who could perform physical feats such as putting together pedestal fans that arrived to stave off the summer heat. Seems God forgot my practical necessities brain region.
_________________
.. one day
in murky water mild,
where Wednesday lay
A Thursday child ..
tektek
Bronze Supporter
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Joined: 24 Nov 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
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My signature was just something I scribbled (well in this case typed on the laptop) when I had a bit of insomnia and woke up at that glorious time - dawn. There's always birds outside my window and they talk a lot more when no one's around (I relate
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... are you running away when your break is over? no more Off the Wall quizzes on WP?
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in saying that, i will have to reduce my participation level on WP when i return to work... all work and no fun. (boooo!)
granted, but unfortunately the region of your brain that would typically be associated with practical skill was in fact associated with additional language and additional creativity skills... that prime real-estate is now commandeered so you can assemble pedestal fans (and Ikea furniture
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...your capacity for spoken language and creativity is not so much diminished as it is now confused... very confused... you are now fluent in swahili and portugese (and only swahili and portugese) and write only in beautiful cursive sanskrit... you now also feel strangely compelled to direct your creative energy to painting garden gnomes with early germanic medieval livery designs... you have almost become a sort of human rosetta stone.
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~
i wish that i could skip continents to follow seasons that i like.
_________________
"see without looking, hear without listening, breathe without asking" - W.H Auden
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why, thank you for your kind suggestion
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I suspect I will be back for more quizzes.. I certainly would not like this much gaming time to be a permanent fixture in my routine.. but actually, I am looking at going back to study this year so waiting to move in a month or so. Probably only looking after animals 'til then ( 2 cats, and I foster dogs). I will be a mature age (read loser *ahem*) student; but it may actually work now that I have some insight into perhaps why I didn't finish any of the (3-4) degrees earlier.
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...your capacity for spoken language and creativity is not so much diminished as it is now confused... very confused... you are now fluent in swahili and portugese (and only swahili and portugese) and write only in beautiful cursive sanskrit... you now also feel strangely compelled to direct your creative energy to painting garden gnomes with early germanic medieval livery designs... you have almost become a sort of human rosetta stone.
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You can, however the plan gets mangled up with the addition of Ozzy Osbourne as navigator and planner to your travel crew. He manages to schedule your arrivals in a distinctly off-season way; specifically you wind up spending winter in Iceland and losing your fingers to frost bite. There is no one to blame (specifically, to point the finger at *giggles*) so you are forced to retire on a remote equatorial rock in the middle of the ocean where you resemble a sultana and shout bitter tirades at any passing seagulls or humans.
Either that, or you would need very very very long legs and you wouldn't be able to sleep properly because no one would know of a big enough bed
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I wish that I did not have such a penchant for causing unusual suffering in the corruption of wishes in this forum.
edit - quote
_________________
.. one day
in murky water mild,
where Wednesday lay
A Thursday child ..
tektek
Bronze Supporter
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Joined: 24 Nov 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
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returning to study is a good thing, especially because you have more understanding of the direction you want to take and the approaches that will work for you... and it is a far cry from being a loser... i don't mean to tell you what's what but i must say please don't put yourself down
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...and if you don't mind sharing, what are you going to be studying?
also, i must also confess i was thinking that you were going to disappear without a trace... leaving me to be eccentric (read:crazy) by myself (oh, no!) and posting on a semi-regular basis (read: compulsive) in the Off the Wall forum... and i was
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~
Either that, or you would need very very very long legs and you wouldn't be able to sleep properly because no one would know of a big enough bed
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~
granted, but without your causing unusual suffering in response to this thread people would stop being impaled by their own fanciful wishes (figuratively speaking)... the trend of only offering inoffensive responses would snowball into other threads and result in only the most saccharine responses being made in every thread... and then in real life. individuals would carry this trend into their daily lives, censoring their humour, suppressing any urge for witty repartee, suppressing the urge to challenge authority
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those in power with less than honourable intentions note and seize on this sweeping change in how humanity reacts and indeed behaves... with no challenge, there is no competition... with no competition there is only Big Brother. soon enough humanity is dressed in grey polyester, miserable in their existence - in their now conditioned monotonous and synthetic cheer, their indifferent painted on smiles, smelling of oily thick and sickly foul mind pickling gin; unquestioning... the spark of humanity is gone...
...and then the TV rating season finishes and with it finishes Big Brother... the spark of humanity re-ignites somewhere in a township of Johannesburg and a wave of random practical jokes ignites what once was - people emerge from their dreadful waking nightmare as there is nothing on television except re-runs of "who's the boss", "full house", and... "webster"
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...so you see, it's actually very important that you continue as you are, causing unusual suffering in this thread, humanity would go to the dogs otherwise
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~
i wish that i could just up and go to Japan for 3 months of spring.
(that would be lovely)
_________________
"see without looking, hear without listening, breathe without asking" - W.H Auden
returning to study is a good thing, especially because you have more understanding of the direction you want to take and the approaches that will work for you... and it is a far cry from being a loser... i don't mean to tell you what's what but i must say please don't put yourself down
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why thank you, that is sweet. and .. right
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Hm. the big question. the dreaded question. I have an ususual set of interests, so I applied for study in both the scientific field and the musical field. I could perhaps apply for art, too. There was a problem with the audition tape I sent in (bit of a long story
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I like interacting with you too
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~
granted, but without your causing unusual suffering in response to this thread people would stop being impaled by their own fanciful wishes (figuratively speaking)... the trend of only offering inoffensive responses would snowball into other threads and result in only the most saccharine responses being made in every thread... and then in real life. individuals would carry this trend into their daily lives, censoring their humour, suppressing any urge for witty repartee, suppressing the urge to challenge authority

those in power with less than honourable intentions note and seize on this sweeping change in how humanity reacts and indeed behaves... with no challenge, there is no competition... with no competition there is only Big Brother. soon enough humanity is dressed in grey polyester, miserable in their existence - in their now conditioned monotonous and synthetic cheer, their indifferent painted on smiles, smelling of oily thick and sickly foul mind pickling gin; unquestioning... the spark of humanity is gone...
...and then the TV rating season finishes and with it finishes Big Brother... the spark of humanity re-ignites somewhere in a township of Johannesburg and a wave of random practical jokes ignites what once was - people emerge from their dreadful waking nightmare as there is nothing on television except re-runs of "who's the boss", "full house", and... "webster"

...so you see, it's actually very important that you continue as you are, causing unusual suffering in this thread, humanity would go to the dogs otherwise
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~
(that would be lovely)
that would be lovely and in regret, I inform you that although you cotton on to Jetstar's japan sale (incredible bargains ! !! ! fly with us ! !! !), your personal secretary miscontrued your instructions and flies you to Japan for OUR spring, not theirs. You miss out on lambs and things, but still manage to romance a Japanese spring chicken
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After this you give up overseas travel indefinitely and stay at home learning how to make minestrone and other soups.
I wish that I had a real wish (everything is pretty good now. 'bones' is on soon
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_________________
.. one day
in murky water mild,
where Wednesday lay
A Thursday child ..
tektek
Bronze Supporter
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Joined: 24 Nov 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
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thank you for sharing
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science, particularly math, and music sound like a great combination for you
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~
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After this you give up overseas travel indefinitely and stay at home learning how to make minestrone and other soups.
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...but somehow mastering minestrone makes it all worthwhile
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~
granted, and so the WP "real wish randomiser" (TM) pops into existence... this new contraption takes the fuss out of wishes and ads a touch of random (as indicated on the control panel) via the recently created infinite improbability engine... as seen here (click).
unfortunately, as with any new technology, there are a few problems with calibration... and the infinite improbability engine is very good at its job description - only the most improbable occurs when it is active... you engage the machine, soft and unnervingly cheery clicks emanate from within and in the heartbeat of a honey-eater the pony that you once thought you might like to have as a youngster... is sitting in front of you on a giant ottoman trimmed in what looks like living tennis ball fuzz, speaking at (grr!) you in Catalan (the language of its native Andorra) and breaking into heavily accented English to refer to itself in the third person and to demand (hoof pounding the ground) that you fetch it as many copies of the children's book Grug as are available (click)... for its dinner, as that is all it will eat.
there is no return address for the pony.
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~
i wish i enjoyed swimming as much as i do actually like the ocean and water... i seem to only have got it half right.
_________________
"see without looking, hear without listening, breathe without asking" - W.H Auden
Granted... But when a big massive heat wave comes? thats hardly any water to swim in, just pure sand sand sand sand sand....
I wish I could get some multiplayer games on my psp?
_________________
BACK in London…. For now.
Follow my adventures on twitter: @superboyian
Please feel free to help my aspie friend become a pilot: https://gofund.me/a9ae45b4
As soon as your wish is fulfilled, the sheer ecstasy makes all the neurons in your brain burn out that represent what a psp is, what it looks like or what to do with it. You are psp-blind and unable even to hear or read the word. And now your wish is granted.
I wish I knew what a psp is.
Granted. You now know what a PSP is, and the horrible and mediocre games that plague it, and you can never remove that information from you're psyche. (I hope no PSP fans take offense to that, I just really don't like it).
I wish that Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep would come out already.
I wish that Kingdom Hearts Birth by Sleep would come out already.
Granted. However as soon as you start playing it you are transported back to 1983 and find yourself playing pacman on an Atari and you go "WHAT THE ...????????"
I wish i could sell souls, like bottle them up and sell them to people, i'm still fuzzy on what the applications would be but still i'm sure i'd make a fortune =D
_________________
"Whatever you do in life will be insignificant but it's very important that you do it because no one else will."
Granted.... But when you was selling souls, you suddenly realized you sold your own soul to another stranger, now you seem zombified
I wish I never had said that above ^^
_________________
BACK in London…. For now.
Follow my adventures on twitter: @superboyian
Please feel free to help my aspie friend become a pilot: https://gofund.me/a9ae45b4