Corrupt A Wish

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Granted. The rack also makes short work of your neck muscles, hip muscles etc.

I wish for a giant falling 3-ton anvil above my head. (good luck corrupting that...)

Granted, the anvil falls, narrowly missing you but flattening your computer instead.

I wish for something splendiferous to happen.

It does. And then you regret it.

(:roll: What can I say, I used up all my creative juices robbing the green grocer)



(I didn't just say that)

I wish I hadn't just admitted to using a banana to rob the grocer of all his grapefruits. A girl needs something to go with her bacon, doesn't she?

Granted, but Crackling splits on you to the police anyway... despite stealing an apple for him.

I wish for a banana split.

Me too! Granted, but I get to eat 3/4 of it.

I wish I didn't have to work with crazy landlady today.

Granted, you get to work with crazy landlady every day of September instead.

I wish it would stop raining!

Granted, you've traveled back in time to about a month ago.

I wish I could find some beet seeds.

Granted, I'll send you the packet I found today ... dated 2002 and stored in an uninsulated shed year-round....

I wish female physiology weren't so damn ...... cyclical, or something. Ick.

Granted; it is now linear, tending towards infinite ick per second.

I wish female physiology would become cyclical again.

Granted, it cycles annually, with the seasons, like might make some damn sense. Hell with the monthlies.

I wish ... sugar didn't lower my tolerance for wine. Because dark chocolate, oh yes. Oh yes.

Granted but dark chocolate no longer exists


I wish I was smart, fit and sexy.

Granted! but sexy is a variable term your only sexy to 90 year olds and above... have a good day!

I wish for more time in a day...

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Granted your watch runs fast. There are now 25 hours in a day.

I wish for a productive day tomorrow.

Granted, a truck (lorry) drives through your front fence and you have a very productive day mending the damage.

I wish my landlady's depression will go away, poor girl.

Granted, now she's annoyingly chipper. ALL THE TIME.

I wish my daddy was all better.

He's all better. Better than you will ever be at anything, and won't let you forget it!

I wish my chipper-all-the-time landlady will take that trip to visit her daughter and granddaughter in Canada next month like she's thinking of doing.