Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, she's planning on it, but in order to afford it she needs three months rent in advance.

I wish my favorite time of year weren't so fleeting.

Granted, your favorite season lasts all year long, so there's no food (e.g. your favorite time of year is summer, when all the crops are ripening -- except there was no spring, so no crops were planted and fertilized!)

I wish more people would home-school (the school buses are havoc on traffic!)

Granted, but the kids are given poor education and America loses all its skills to China. ... Hmmm wait a minute

I wish to take a nap shortly.

Granted. You awaken in the year 3001. Enjoy being a fish out of temporal water.

I wish I had a device to retrieve the lost episodes of Doctor Who.

Granted, but it turns out they're absolutely awful and deserved to be forgotten anyway.

I wish that Breaking Dawn ends how I want it to end...

Granted, but due to an interim plot twist that ending is no longer satisfying.

I wish my interview goes well tomorrow and that I will be moving soon.

...Granted....

However, in order for the ending to be as you wish, the beginning must also be changed. Since the original intent of the storyline has now changed, your interest in it has also never been established.... Since you never established any sort of affinity to it, your original desire to post it as your wish also never existed. In which case the 45 seconds you took to type out your response has been altered within the time continuum creating a 45 second delay in anything and everything that was and will ever happen in your life.
This results in you never meeting your soul mate, never landing the gig you wanted, and never meeting the dozen or so true friends meant for you to meet along your life, etc.
In fact, this alteration in time results in you ultimately living a life you were never meant to live from this point on, but since you never live it you never notice and don't even notice that it was altered in the first place. The only clue is a message on a board talking about imaginary wishes and the unsettling thought in the back of your mind that it is quite possible for the course of your life to have been completely altered through your own ambitions without you actually knowing about it or having a concept about it till this very moment.
........Of course if you hadn't thought about it, it probably would be more likely to exist. Since you are thinking about it, it makes it that much less likely to be a probability for you....or does it?
Eventually you think about it so much you give yourself a headache and decide the wish really wasn't worth it in the first place.

I.... wish dreams could be videotaped.

Gah! Double answer!

Granted ... however, you took so long dreaming out that wish that the camera ran out of batteries and all you got was something about Breaking Dawn and it ending 45 seconds late, and what was the point?

I wish to go to sleep now. And sleep WELL! despite the dark chocolate ice cream at bedtime, and all its caffeine.

Granted, but the caffeine gives you nightmares about 45 second breaks in the dawn... or something.

I wish I could watch any live-action scene from history on my TV. And see what REALLY happened.

Granted, but it shows the scene from inside the person rather than from a particular angle outside.

I wish I could save states, like SNES emulators do.

Granted, But I have no idea what your talking about so you end up following various politicians as they attempt to "save states"

I wish brain freeze was contagious so I could give it to people who laugh at me when I get it.

Granted. Now everyone has brain freeze. Permanently. I hope you're happy.

I wish I didn't have brain freeze thanks to your wish.

Granted. Except now you have no sensory information to tell you when to stop sucking down that Slurpee, and you give yourself brain frostbite.

I wish I could sleep on a grassy knoll and not roll off.

Granted. You get trampled on by two guys about to shoot Kennedy instead.

I wish that I could travel to alternate dimensions using written words, TV shows, movies, etc as a guide.

Granted. Except you enter a dimension just like this one except chocolate tastes like broccoli.

I wish I was best friends with the giant kool-aid pitcher from the 80's commercials that would bust through your door and turn everything into a fruit-punch flavored party.