WP story-- add on to it and it had better make sense!

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MADDuck yawned and rolled over. He didn't want to go to work, but he had to pay a parking ticket and had spent his check on rent, food and DVDs. He had a pain in his head, because he was out of Celexa and they still hadn't sent him more. He had a pain in his finger from when he had broken it a month before, after falling on it, after passing out, after getting brain fog, after feeling so depressed he thought he was going to drop dead. He had a pain in both his legs from when he had been pushed down the stairs by his boss, who had fired him the day before. He was depressed-- more depressed than usual-- and couldn't remember why.


Oh, yes. The fall down the stairs. Something in his leg snapping out of place. The boss firing him.


Silly MADDuck! Stupid, silly MADDuck! Here he was heading to work, and he'd been fired!


MADDuck sunk back into bed.


The phone rang.


MADDuck reached over and picked it up. He did not want to talk to his boss. He wasn't working for him any more, so why should he? He would give his boss an earful.


"Hello."


"f**k OFF! WHAT ARE YOU DOING, HARASSING ME AGAIN? YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A LAZY-ASS BUM YOURSELF! SAVE IT!" MADDuck hung up, embarrassed at his lack of creativity. This made him even more depressed and angry. He picked up the phone and chucked it across the room, breaking it and denting the wall, then the floor.


Well, to hell with it. He wasn't going to pay for the damn phone, or the damage to the wall, or the scratches on the floor, or the damage he had done to his cubicle at work the day before. Heck, he wasn't even going to get another job so that he could pay for his plane ticket to Cape Cod, where hios dear friend Ana54 and her friend username88 were supposed to be., un username88's new apartment. He would just find a way to sneak onto a plane. He'd seen it done in movies before. He just needed to be calm, that was all. To heck with nerves, and depression. He had never seen a depressed or nervous person in a movie do anything other than killing themself or making a fool of themself.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Username88 stood still, holding the phone in his hand.


MADDuck was really losing it. He had Ana all to himself now!


Or not? Username88's mood suddenly went down the toilet. What if MADDuck came, killed him, and took Ana? Cummon; the guy was off his... off his Celexa. Username rushed into the kitchen and started slashing and ripping open boxes at random. He needed to find the knives, and his paintball gun. As if an Aspie holocaust wasn't enough! Now this!


Icarus_Falling would be coming soon. He had throwing knives and several firearms. Real ones. EatingPoetry, Richardbenson and Trigger11 would also be arriving soon. That was good. They could distract the enemy with their built-in weapons-- their mouthes. Username88 enjoyed the fact that he'd be able to use them as weapons againstt an enemy, rather than having them use his girlfriend as their verbal punching bag.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Cultus_Diabolus sat on the beach, staring out at the water. He needed a boat. He had no car, and wouldn't be able to afford gas anyway. His free money from the government had been cut off. And he needed to get to the WrongPlanet emergency conference.


The only way he could hijack a boat, and not get caught, was to take the occupants or owners hostage.


He needed a gun.


And one or two partners.


Who else on WP lived in California?


Eire, ShadesOfMe, Sandra3, a newbie whose name he didn't remember, and a whole bunch of other people.


ShadesOfMe would help him. He knew she was underaged, so she probably didn't have or couldn't afford her own transportation. He didn't know about the others.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Aradford had rented the helicopter.


He was depressed.


Not too depressed to be trying to solve his problem, thouhg. Not too depressed to have gone over it in his mind 10 times and try to decide what to do.


Crash the copter into the parliament buildings, or jsut decapitate himself with the propellers?


His phone rang.


He picked it up. Maybe something in what that person said would be a sign of what he should do.


"Hello. Can I speak to Aradford?"


"This is him."


"This is Cervantes talking."


"Cervantes from WrongPlanet?"


"And I have Mish with me. Here, talk to her. I want to go work on my Star Wars movie."


MishLuvsHer2Boys got on the phone. "So are you picking us up or not? You said you'd rented a helicopter."


"I-- I d--?" Oh, of course! THAT was why he'd rented the copter. Why did he keep thinking it was to kill himself?


"We're at Cervantes's place... as you probably guessed," Mish said, looking with disdain at Cervantes's closed bedroom door. "We're waiting for your okay. We're not starting until you tell me you've got it landed, and where. You need to stay on the phone with me. I'll have it in my pocket. When you hear me saying 'Everyone into the back!', that's when you start toward us. You land right in front of the bank, and we all crowd in, and then we're gone. We go straight to the airport, where we get off, with the money, blow up the copter as a diversion, and hijack the nearest plane."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


TheMachine1 felt bad about leaving his family behind. But he had no choice.


There was an Aspie holocaust going on.


They needed to be together, if they wanted to survive.


The other community leaders were already at the notsosafehouse when he arrived.


Quatermass was arguing with a giant, hulking newbie who wanted him to change his name to Quartermass because he was a quarter of the newbie's size. Quatermass was arguing back that he'd ban the newbie if he didn't show moderators the proper respect and stop acting like a big bag mean machine to try and brute-force his way into a leadership position.


Calandale and MrMark were standing at a partition that held several bottles, pouring Vodka into their coffee, and Gwenevyn was comforting tygereyes and Graelwyn at once, her arms around both of them, as tygereyes cried silent teaers and Graelwyn sobbed openly. Flagg stood behind Graelwyn, awkwardly patting her on the head, silent tears streaming down his own cheeks.


There were about 100 members crowded into the apartment already.


Ana54 and username88 sat together, gripping each other's hands as though if thye let go they would fall into a deep dark depression and never come out. They stared silently in Gwen's direction, watching her comfort tygereyes and Graelwyn, listening to her telling them that they had to cheer up and focus, and take antidepressants if they had to,and giving username88 a furtive look as she said the part about the antidepressants.


"Calm down, Quater," MrMark said. "We have a speech to make." With one last Horatio-Caine-like glance over at the newbie, and a warning-- "Newbie, watch yourself--" MrMark motioned Quatermass over to the other moderators. MrMark, Alex, Quatermass, Calandale, Gwenevyn, TheMachine1, Flagg, Krex, and the other community leaders sat or stood at the front of the living room. There was jsut enough room for everyone. Smelena sat with her two older sons in her lap, while her husband held the third son on his shoulders. People stood on their suitcases to see over others' heads.


"This is like a cattle car to Auschwitz," Irulan muttered. "I wonder if we shouldn't just turn ourselves in and riot in the concentration camp. At least we'd have space to move."


"If you count being able to turn over on your shelf when the fourteen other occupants of the shelf also want to turn over, whilst craning to see and hear a person giving a speech while sitting in the rafters," Ana54 retorted.


"Oh, that sounds h-hh-horrible!" iamnotaparakeet said, shivering and causing three people in the vicinity to shosh hot coffee down themselves due to the awkward cramped conditions.


"OW!" Age1600 shouted. "f**k!" When she saw that it was iamnotaparakeet, she apologized profusely. "Oh, you ahve social anxiety too; so do I; I'm so sorry, Parakeet, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! Want a mint?"


She dug into her handbag for mints.


Iamnotaparakeet turned back to Irulan and Ana54 and said, "I-I-is t-th-that tr-ruhue?"


"I know everything about Auschwitz," Ana54 said.


"I know more," Irulan said.


"Who were the first four people to escape from the place?"


"Oh, come on, guys!" CockneyRebel said, moving closer to them and accidentally smacking UbbyUbbyUbby in the face with her huge purse. "Times change. It's not like we'll have privacy in our barracks like they did back then, where we can discuss and plot things. This is the 21st century! There will be cameras everywhere!"


Star nodded. "They'll probably use the GED on us."


"What?" iamnotaparakeet spluttered. "to prove we're stupid? They're stupid! Most of us graduated high school; we're way above the--"


"Not the high school equivalency test!" Ana54 said, laughing in spite of herself and the circumstances.


"The Graduated Electricity Device," Star said. "Or something."


"Or Decelerator," Ana54 said. "Whatever. It shocks people."


Star nodded wisely. "Skin shocks."


Greenblue looked confused. Iamnotaparakeet looked terrified. Irulan looked grim. CockneyRebel looked disgusted. Ana54 smiled, and username88 said "Oh my God, what is this exactly?"


"It's used at the Judge Rotenberg Educational Center," Star said. "They attach a box with wires and elect--"


"SILENCE! Quiet please!"


All eyes snapped to the front. The whispers, the stims, even the spazzes stopped.


Alex sat on a chair off to the side of the front of the room, his face in his hands, trying to look like he was simply exhausted as opposed to crying.


Calandale had to speak for him. MrMark and Quatermass stood slightly to the side looking set and grim, making the room sizzle with even more tension.


"Beloved WrongPlanet natives, immigrants and refugees. We are under attack. There is a price on all our heads. And several among us have already been murdered."


There were gasps all around the room. Sobs, demands to know exacly who was murdered.


Alex shot a furious look at Calandale through his hands. then he got up to speak for himself.


"Ne-never mind right now. We have to get-- hic-- out of here. One member-- a double agent-- sold us out. They know we're in Cape Cod."

"It's kind of late to split up and just go," someone was saying.


"Ex-actly. It's-- too late. We need to fight. Or go peacefully, but either way we want to stick together. Right?"


Everyone nodded, said "Aye," "Yes," "Oui," "Aye-uh." the WPers who didn't want to stick together simply hadn't come to the meeting.


"We need to vote," MrMark said, as he and Quatermass each looked at Alex and Quatermass touched his arm awkwardly to try and comfort him.


"FIGHT!" someone shouted. It was Samtoo. The others around him took up the chant: "FICHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"


"REVOLT!" Ana54 and Irulan shouted, looking at each other and grinning and giggling.


"I see there's no need for a formal revolt. I mean, a formal vote," Alex said. He wasn't crying any more. The fact that the Aspies, his beloved Aspies, were sticking together and revolting and not going to their fate, whatever it was, like Temple Grandin's cows to the slaughter, seemed to have put new life in him.


"They'll be calling in SWAT teams," MrMark or Quatermass said.


As if on cue, a siren wailed somewhere outside. Just one, though. That was good. Someone had probably just called the cops about the noise, nothing more. "We have to move fast. We have an hour. Maybe more, probably less."


Age1600 had finally found her box of mints. "Does anyone want a mint?" she asked, holding them up.


"Does anyone want some Valium?" KingdomOfRats asked, as he passed out whole boxes ofthe stuf. "I knew we'd need it, so I brougth the entire supply from the group home."


"f**k your drugs!" Kilroy shouted, as Richardbenson drained the last of his beer and looked toward the kitchen, and someone else took a handful of pre-rolled joints out of his pocket and opened his mouth as if to ask who wanted one.


"LET'S MOVE!"


Ana54 smacked herself on the head. It had been such a funny scene that she had stood there savoring it and imprinting it in her memory so she could tell people about it later. But now she was just as stupid as them. Stupider!


Richardbenson came out of the kitchen with a bottle of beer, downing it in five gulps, and then smashed both his bottles agaisnt the doorframe, showering people who were tyring to get in with glass. Forks, knive, rolling pin, pots and pans, all other utensils including spoons, all taken.


Ana54 grabbed a plate and pushed past people into the bathroom to smash it in the tub, as people were already smashing glasses in the kitchen sink.


Ana found Bigbang smashing up the toilet with a hammer. The sink was already gone, every single shard of it, and the cabinet doors too.


People all over were shouting.


"Leave the windows alone!"


"They'll catch us anyway!"


"They'll gas us! Leave them alone!"


"I don't have a weapon!"


"Use the faucet!"


"How'm I supposed to get it off the wall?"


Ana54 smashed her plate in the tub, getting bits of tile in her hair and one embedded in the top of her head as Netish and Bigbang smashed up the tile wall. Ana had to admire them. They already had hammers for weapons, but they were making sure everyone else had a weapon. Most people, Ana was grateful to see as she picked up the two largest pieces of the plate, had two or three weapons.


"We need an axe!" Netish shouted.


"What for?"


"To cut the pipes!"


"AAAAGH!"


"Get that taser gun OUT of the bathroom!"


Ana54 didn't see what difference it would make, as the water from the opened pipes was flowing down the hall, not only from the bathroom, but from the kitchen as well.


"He's USING the axe!"


"WHY?"


"To cut up the chairs!"


"DON'T CUT UP THE CHAIRS!"


Alex shouted over and over at the others to pile the extra weapons in the center of the living room. He figured the center was the best place, because if it was in a corner it would be close to the door or windows, which the cops or SWAT teams could come in through at any moment.


The pile rose to six feet high-- chair legs, pieces of broken plates and bowls and mugs and glasses, toilet and sink and tile and pipe, cupboard doors, forks, knives, spoons, other utensils, nooses made from strips of bedsheet and wastebaskets to use as shields or drop over the enemies' heads to disorient them.


"You broke the toilet? You broke the frackin' TOILET? How am I supposed to take a piss?"


"Use a cop's mouth."


"Piss out the window."


"Use the front of a cop's pants."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`


MADDuck spotted the sweet old man as soon as he stepped off the bus at the airport. Somehwo, he trusted him . Tears welled up in MADDuck's eyes. The man reminded him of his father and his grandfather. He went over to ask the man a favor. He got right to the point.


"Sir... I'm an Aspie trying to escape. Can you distract the poeple at the desk so that I can sneak into the back on the conveyor belt?"


The man, being old-school and fairly ignorant of technology, was happy to help an Aspie in any way he could.


MADDuck suddenly froze. He had a better idea, a more simple, obvious, one, one way less risky. He would simply wait in the bathroom for a TSA agent and assault him and take his uniform. It was against the law to have cameras in the bathrooms.


But he would need help. He said, "On second thought, can you help me with something else?"


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`


Username88 looked around the room, wishing he had a better weapon. He had no paintballs for his paintball gun, but it looked like a real gun to many people, so he had given it to a newbie who, eager to prove himself and establish himself in the Aspie community, ahd vounteered to be on the perimeter, the front line, one of the first the cops would get to.

Smelena had actually brought along a hot poker, which she was keeping hot with a lighter. All username88 had was a fistful of sharpened branches and a small radio that was very loud when you turned it up as high as it would go. Maybe he could shock or confuse an enemy by sticking it near the enemy's ear.


Sassyaspie had a sword and a long, thick branch from outside. Pandors had one of Icarus's throwing knives and a kitchen drawer, whcih could also be used as a shield. Syzygyish had picked up all the shards of glass and porcelain and putthem in a plastic bowl, to throw in an enemy's eyes if need be. Brittany2907 had a knife and pepper spray, Ana54 had the two big plate pieces and a can of spray paint Samtoo had given her, as well as several more weapons in her pockets, including a lethal knife she had made out of sharp pieces of cardboard from a milk carton taped together. Likedcalico and Gwenevyn sat on the floor making shanks out of razor blades and plastic toothbrushes, with the help of lighters.


Everyone was crowded inside away from the windows. The admins were standing in front of the pile of weapons. The people with the best weapons were on the outside of the crowd, closest to the doors and windows.


But nobody had thought to pile the luggage in front ofthe doors or windows.


Star, Ana54, Syzygyish and TheMachine1 noticed each other looking from the luggage to the windows or doors, and caught each other's eyes, and each knew what the others were thinking. They rushed over to the luggage and started piling it up. Some others ran to help them.


Likedcalico jumped up nd started screaming something about food, and dumped the contents of the nearest suitcase out.


Clothes and makeup.


Samtoo and Alternative dumped out another one. Aha! Ramen noodles.


Samtoo, Alternative, AnonymousAnonymous and Netish stood together a few minutes leter, looking around nervously as the sound of sirens filled the surrounding streets. Samtto caught Ana54's eye and waved her and username88 over to his groiup. Samtoo looked sad. This somehow reminded Ana of her friend Kalister1, and then she remembered her other friends and looked around for them. She spotted Kalister pacing back and forth in front of the puile of weapons, holding a BB gun, knives strapped onto his belt all around his waist, and Greenblue pacing bavk and forth in the wide living room doorway, his pockets bulging with objects that were fairly large.


"Greenblue! Kalister! Over here!"

Thats a little much to read :/

This would make a great graphic novel; I think you just topped me in terms of long posts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Icarus stood and watched the frantic, hopeless din, and cursed his luck; sharp sticks and ceramic shanks? <sigh> He knew these poor people, his adopted brothers and sisters, were doomed. Oh, they’d put up a fight, fight like hell tooth and nail… But they were doomed. Icarus had spent years preparing, training, stockpiling for that time when the s**t finally hit the fan. But for once in his life he was caught unprepared. He expected a gathering of aspies, not a round-up into the cattle cars. What the hell was happening? How could this be happening? It just didn't make sense... In any case, his best equipment was left at home, many things that would be useful in a standoff like this: gasmasks, body armour, sniper rifles, thousands of rounds of ammo... Not enough to fight the government toe-to-toe; but enough to engage in some costly asymmetric skirmishes, enough to raise the cost of declaring war. But as it was he’d only brought along what he normally carried; a 10mm pistol and 4 folding combat knives. Luckily those throwing knives and tomahawks were still in his Jeep from his last practice session, and he’d brought them inside and distributed them; but it was so little to do so much… He didn’t even have a spare clip of ammo with him.

Icarus bummed a beer off richardbenson and sat down between him and Syzygyish; the beer was a Pabst Blue Ribbon, a weak lager not at all to his taste. But he sat and tried to savor it regardless; he savored the irony that the last beer he ever tasted would be a crappy one, but was thankful for the beer all at the same time. He sat and savored the moment, and let his mind wander….

He remembered in The Matrix how when the rebels were trapped on the upper floors of a building, how they'd escaped by climbing down through the wet wall. He went into the bathroom that his comrades had already demolished, and noticed that there was indeed a space behind the wall where the pipes were. He pulled some more of the smashed wall away, and peered into the tiny space. Shining a pocket flashlight down into the space, he noticed that it went down a couple of stories and stopped; it would be a tight fit, but Icarus only smiled at this thought; one of his specialties was infiltration, which involved a lot of slipping through spaces supposedly too small to get through.

Icarus was pondering where the tunnel might lead (if anywhere?) when there was a commotion outside. The sound of many sirens, the flashing of red and blue lights. He glanced out of a crack in the barricade in front of one of the windows. Wow; lots of police, and some that looked like military. National guard, maybe? But they had strange black uniforms on. They also had one of those big APCs fitted with a ramming prow so that it could be used to breach buildings.

“Damn,” Icarus muttered. “ With that thing they’ll be able to come in right through the front wall.”

Someone came on a loudspeaker. “Autistics: We have your compound completely surrounded. You have no chance to resist, and there is no escape. You are hereby ordered to come out, one by one, with your hands in the air, and submit yourself for 'processing'. You have 10 minutes to comply before we escalate this action.”

Many of the younger folks started getting very frantic.

“What will we do?”, cried ShadesOfMe.

“They’re going to drag us off!”, yelled AnonymousAnonymous.

“How will we fight them?”, calmly asked RainSong; Danielismyname stood next to her in silence, and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

“We’re gonna kick some ass before they get us!”, roared samtoo.

MrMark, Alex, Quatermass, Calandale, Gwenevyn, TheMachine1, Flagg, Krex were huddled in a corner, speaking in hushed tones. Maybe they would come up with something; maybe not... Perhaps they were contemplating surrender; but what would surrender mean?

Icarus knew he had to do something; his instincts told him he’d be better off on his own; his training and background in stealth and infiltration were being wasted sitting here, waiting for the impending strike; he felt useless, just sitting here. Then divine inspiration took him; Loki had planted a crazy plan in Icarus's mind. Chances were he’d get himself killed or worse, but he remembered something Cat once said in Red Dwarf. “It’s better to live an hour as a tiger, than entire lifetime as a worm...” (And also the ironic Rimmer corollary, "Who ever heard of a wormskin rug?")

Icarus strode across the room to where Ana was trying frantically to direct perimeter defense. Icarus grabbed Ana, spun her around, and gave her a long, passionate kiss. “For luck.” He remarked to her look of astonished surprise. Username88 looked rather annoyed at this spectacle, and Icarus tossed him an apologetic glance. Then, Icarus cried out, “See you all in Valhalla!” And without a further word, he ran into the bathroom and dove through the hole in the wet wall, and disappeared down the pipe tunnel…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good fortune,

- Icarus uses the enemy’s assets against them…

A group of newbies was arguing. They had all volunteered to be on the front lines to prove themselves, but now they were all trying to get each other to go first. A shoving match ensued. Ana54 shouted, "Icarus!" Username88 was shaking. Kilroy was swearing over and over. "f**k, f**k, fuckity f**k! Shite! Damn!" It was almost as though he had Tourette's.


"They're climbing the walls!" someone shouted.


"Where the f**k is Icarus? We need him!"


"He bailed out on us!"


"He what?!"


"He's Icarus. He doesn't do that."


"I saw him escape through the bathroom wall."


"Who else did?"


"Nobody."


Ana and username88 looked at each other and grinned. There were no traitors. No cowards. Icarus was doing something to help them. They knew him better than to think he was a deserter.


GoatOnFire came into the room carrying two pots full of steaming water. "Ana!" he called. "Hurry the f**k up!"


Ana and Username dashed forward and grabbed the pots of boiling water from GOF, username almost slohing his down himself in his nervous hurry.


The newbies now sat huddled under the window, clutching the good weapons. "Give them to someone who's got guts!" Ana shouted at them. Samtoo was already asking one of them politely for Username88's paint ball gun, while Netish grabbed a rifle from another one. A scuffle ensued and the newbie accidentally pulled the trigger, discharging a bullet into the ceiling. The people upstairs screamed. It sounded like a married couple. Ana and Netish hoped they weren't hurt. The newbies were too scared to care, and Samtoo was too busy shooting out the windows, which Alternative and AnonymousAnonymous had opened after disarming two newbies together, one by one. Alt had a M-16 and Anon had an AK-47. Ana54 looked at it jealously and hoped Anon was a good shot. He was doing pretty well. Ana didn't know what to do with her pot of boiling water. She hoped someone would come soon before it got cold.


Someone fired a tear gas canister up through the window.


BANG!


"I got him!" Netish shrieked.


There was nobody alive outside any more. They all had at least one shot to the head, and they were all lying still.


"More will be coming," Ana said miserably and unnecessarily.


They looked out. Even the cowardly newbies got up to look. A long line of people were walking down the street in the distance, escorted by people in black vests. An old man and woman supporting each other and crying. A woman with one baby on her back and another in her arms. An old woman with a walker, a grandmother holding her 5-year-old granddaughter's hand, a geeky boy with greasy hair and Harry-Potter-like engrossed in a newspaper. He should be in here with us, Ana thought.

Im sorry, you know Im not going to be able to take this seriously and end up totally f*****g up the story where everyone dies or something

Ha, yeah, I feel like no matter how I start my segment of the story, it will end with a cosmic demon war.

Oh dude, come on! You're just gonna let me get away with kissing Ana like that?


Where do you think I'm headed with this? Ragnarok cometh! (There's a custom-made sticker on the back of my Jeep that says that. )

And no, Icarus is not running away; he does have a plan; but he'll write more about it on the morrow...

Good fortune,

- Icarus is eyeballing that ACP...

Yes, I agree, it would make a good one.

That would be interesting actually.



How about adding some adult content?

Syzygyish observed the room.He couldn't believe Aspys were shouting.
He analysed the situation.
"Silence" he thought.
"Silence is our friend.Silence is our nature.
Ah well,it's a spectrum,I suppose.
But stategically,we need silence!Or is it tactically?


So this is it.I'm going to die in a noisy hail of bullets"

Syzygyish wished he was back in his room.
With his dictionary.

He considered communicating his silence idea,but didn't want to the attention.

Icarus bummed a beer off richardbenson and sat down between us; the beer was a Pabst Blue Ribbon, a weak lager not at all to his taste.
"Where's mine you rude *****'s!" thought Syzygyish.

He considered the bowl of broken glass he held.
Worthless,for a weapon.He eyed the girl with the samurai sword enviously.Sassyaspy.Six months of Kendo & Iado to his name.Shouldn't have quit.He hoped she had skills.& that she didn't drop it...
He took the bowl of boken glass & placed it under the couch.
"Safety first!" he thought,thinking about automatic pistols & that movie...Cassern? he couldn't stomach & hadn't finished.

Icarus got up & walked out.

"...When you gotta go you gotta go!
Good luck finding a comfortable position on that broken toilet..."

He analysed the situation.
"Looks like I picked a bad day to give up smoking!"
he laughed sarcasticly "Looks like I picked a bad day to give up quoting movie one-liners"

He analyses the situation.
His fingers were trembling.He did his anxiety test & folded the middle finger down into the palm.
It spasmed spastically.
"On a scale of one to ten!" he laughed sobbingly at his own joke.

Icarus crashed past back into the toilet.
"How did he get out of a room with one door..." wondered Syzygyish
"and I'm glad I didn't have any of that beer!"

He analyses the situation.
"I haven't been on Holidays for thirty years & the first time I do I walk into this mess!
I don't know anyaspy here,literally just walked through the door.
I'm an Aussie!This has got nothing to bloody do with me!
Damn that Ana54,always whining at me "Come to America!Join the commune!
Why did I listen?
Boy,do I know when to walk into a room,or in this case,a fascist regime.
Maybe all is not lost!Maybe the Rebel Alliance will take back Washington!
I never thought I'd say it,but God save Bush.
We only need to hold out for a few more hours.Maybe!
& what's with the anti-aspy aggenda?"

Someone fired a tear gas canister up through the window.
BANG!
"I got him!" Netish shrieked.
There was nobody alive outside any more. They all had at least one shot to the head, and they were all lying still.
"More will be coming," Ana said miserably and unnecessarily.
They looked out. Syzygyish couldn't believe anyaspy could be so stupid.
"It's America & they've forgotten about snipers?"
He crawled on his belly to the wall & peered through a bullet hole...

Immediately machine gun fire opened up & Aspys were flying everwhere...

Syzygyish rolled over & his eyes fell on the pile of weapons again & widened with awe...
Welcome to America,home of survivalism!
A group of Aspys were sheltered behind it & he briefly locked glances with the most beautiful
young lady he had ever seen.He dragged his gaze away,feeling that same old 'can't look them in the eyes' shame...
Syzygyish thought about what he had seen through that bullet hole.
& he thought about the aspys here,huddled in groups,whimpering in disbelief,raging genuflective defiance,numb nihlistic silence...
and that ataractic young lady,calmly comforting & protecting
"I will not softly go into that dark night" he swore grittily,
"if nothing else I can stand in front of Fate's grisly hate"

Elbowed through the trash to the weapons,grabbed something small with a long magazine
Machine pistol?Find the little button by the trigger,push it over,back to the wall,arm in an arc,extend weapon through window,punch trigger!Fire blind!


Nothing happens.The safety was off.
"Typical"
Punches the button again.This time there's the satisfaction of his hand being hammered hard & the agony of crunching violent sound
"Shut the **** up!" "Don't waste ammo!"
"Why do ppl allways have to yell at me!" sighs Syzygyish forlornly
"Can't use a tool without training!" he shouts back.

He's ready now.
Whatever happens to this little huddled mass of Americans,
he knows he is their knight
"I'd rather be Batman" thinks Syzygyish

"Yeah,the Dark Knight versus the dark night!"

He lies there,regarding his little group of adopted refugee's & his princess unknown.
He analyses the situation
"**** it" he thinks "we're all going down,do it,doughnut,what have you got to lose?"
Still, intending a shout,all he can manage is softly
"Hey, I'm horny,can anyaspy spare 3 minutes."
& forces himself to look her in the eye.

"Sorry,I'm a lesbian." she says







"Typical" thinks Syzygyish.

No man, it would be some real gruesome evil s**t. I would certainly get banned

"No,let me rephrase that"
thinks Syzygyish

"Bugger"


"Bugger,bugger,bugger"


Syzygyish analyses the situation.

"bugger,bugger,bugger,bugger,bugger,bugger,bugger"

Syzygyish tries to look at his ? princess
Thats funny

Syzygyish can only look at the ceiling
he wonders if looking out that bullet hole was revealing

suddenly he remembers how cold he
didn't want to be
"I'm sorry "



Syzygyish suddenly starts laughing

Meanwhile in Britain, the British Aspies of WrongPlanet prepare to join the Americans to fight with them.

TheAPERSON and deep-techno were on the plane to America. They were passing the time to join the war by playing Metroid Prime Hunters so that they would be ready to shoot anything.

Suddenly, a huge explosion is caused. The enemy had targeted the plane and the plane was crashing down into the atlantic.

Just when TheAPERSON and deep-techno were going to die, Anubis came to the rescue. He did several backflips over to the engine room and pulled out a spanner.

"Do you think he's going to be all right?" asks the APERSON.

"Yeah, he'll be fine, " was deep-techno's response.

But there wasn't much time left and Anubis was struggling...

Halfway across the country, more Aspies stood in front of the heavy steel double doors, whispering and waiting.


Poopylungstuffing pretended to be talking about how she had a cold and was sickened by the fact that her boyfriend Flakey didn't know where she was. She coughed up a nasty ball of phlegm and spat it into her water bottle, which was already half-full of phlegm, to use it on a guard when their plan went into action.


They all knew that they were probably going to be gassed. The fact that they were underground-- way inderground, no windows-- was suspicious enough. Even though they were told that they had to wait for the cafeteria to open, they knew that the cafeteria was probably a gas chamber.


Ed Almos was having a hard time containing his fury, and Jason Larsen looked ashamed and embarrassed and sad for some reason.


Poopylungstuffing sat down next to him on one of the faux-leather couches, which had iron frames that were bolted to the floor. "Cheer up," she said. "There's no point in being depressed." Poopylungstuffing knew that they would need all the help they could get to kill some of the guards before they were killed themselves. Depression could seriously harm their performance.


"I'm Scandinavian. Germanic," Jason said miserably. "I feel like some of my relatives may have given these people ideas."


Poopylungstuffing coughed up another ball of phlegm and spat it into the water bottle.


Suddenly, she had an idea.


"Thank you, Jason," she said, as Ed Almos sat down on his other side.


Jason looked puzzled. He had also started fidgeting when Ed had sat down next to him. He didn't know what to say to a Jew. He was so ashamed.


But Jason's admission, combined with the ball of phlegm Poopylungstuffing had just happened to cough up right then, had given Poopy an idea.


"Listen to me, Jason," Ed was saying. "First of all, you're not a German. Second of all, so what if you were? There are and were many good Germans. And look at these Americans! Third of all, whatever your relatives did or didn't do is not your fault. You're your own person, responsible for nobody's actions but your own."


Poopy passed by them and headed toward the perimeter line of guards with machine guns, past Batista90 who was sobbing into her hands that it was all over, while Siuan sat next to her with her arm around her trying to comfort her and whispering something to her to cheer her up, probably about the plan they had come up with on the bus on their way to this outpost.


Past Reodor_Felgen, GoatOnFire, ASPERGERSJOHN, The_AS_Man, Kiss_My_AS, Yog-Sephiroth and ahayes, who were standing together in a tight, sloppy circle like a bunch of insecure high school boys at a party, muttering to each other in a low voice, every few seconds breaking out into what they hoped sounded like hysterical, hormone-driven laughter at a joke that was probably dirty, hoping the guards would think they were simply a bunch of harmless boys and immature men telling dirty jokes, but were talking low because they didn't want the women to hear them.


The_AS_Man broke away from the group and walked casually over to Doc Daneeka, who was sitting alone on a couch drinking Gatorade, trying to look natural, and sat down next to him. "These people are plotting to grab a guard and hold him hostage, and use him as a human shield," The_AS_Man said, pointing at them and looking at them and rolling his eyes, so that the guards who stood around the room's perimeter, glowering down their noses at them, was assume this was something perfectly normal-- that The_AS_Man was simply disgusted with the dirty jokes of the other males, and was now doing a bit of manly gossip about them with Doc_Daneeka.


The_AS_Man continued: "They're going to pretend to get into an argument about girlfriends in a minute. They'll go their separate ways. Then Lucas and Edal-- Ed Almos-- will go over to the group near the cafeteria, and say 'WHAT did you say about Suzetka?' Then me and you will go over to the other group and say, 'What happened? Suzetka is dead! Why did they f*****g slander her?' Then I run to the caf doors and say, 'I wish they'd open up! I'm f*****g hungry!' Then I'll tell them that I'm here now, to go away, and you come running to my defence but say 'Just drop it', and the anti-Suzetka group will say 'We have every right to stand in line for food! f**k off!' So the other group will say, 'We can line up now!' and everyone gets in line. And that's how we all have an excuse to stand around together. We grab the nearest guard and disarm him, they start shooting and we use him as a human shield. We grab as many of them as possible. Some of us will die. I know that. But if any of us want a chance, we have to do it."


Poopylungstuffing already knew of the plan. Btu she was going to distract them. She was going to ask them all kinds of questions, annoying them until they threatened her, then she would pretend to get angry at them and kick one of them in the balls, and force him to swallow the slime in her water bottle. The other guards would hopefully move out of the way, not wanting to step in the vomit that would surely result, and Poopy would step over him and run up the stairs, hopefully to freedom.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`


Malachi_Rothschild was getting out of there.


He was on a plane to Israel, where he would recruit kibbutz people, who would obviously be sympathetic to their case and their cause. He was excited about being an Israeli and Aspie soldier. He had a chance to fight for the two groups he belonged to, at once. Malachi grinend with pride.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Makelifehappen, you're under arrest under the Mental Health Act."


"WHAAAT? Just for walking down the street?"


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"Militarybrat, you need to get off the base. You know you can't live here anymore. It's too dangerous. We could get arrested ourselves for not turning you in. Please leave right now. Write to us, but don't tell us where you are We love you. GO! We will make up a story about you running away."

No, some mod would just delete it. That happened to the longest post I ever posted on WP, I spent over an hour on it, it was in the adult section in a thread entitled "the most disturbing thing ever". I gave them the most disturbing thing ever and it was deleted soon after I posted it.

-------------------------------------

The aspies of the world were obviously in a bad position.

GoatOnFire had an idea. He said "listen up people. Pray to me and you shall find an answer."

Most looked skeptical, however they were desperate.

Most of the aspies began to pray to GoatOnFire. Then all of a sudden a huge and impressive ghostlike representation of GoatOnFire appeared.

Ragtime and iamnotaparakeet were incensed and started to complain about blasphemy. The other aspies praying to GoatOnFire asked him what they should do.

The ghostly GoatOnFire's voice boomed "you fücking idiots. Only God answers prayers." and then the ghostly GoatOnFire flipped them the bird and disappeared.

Then everyone looked at the physical version of GoatOnFire in anger, except for Ragtime and iamnotaparakeet, who looked smug.

The aspies started to pray to God, but it wasn't working. In anger they looked at GoatOnFire and said "now what?"

GoatOnFire said "are there no Mormons here?"

Ragtime and iamnotaparakeet became angry again. "but that isn't the correct way."

GoatOnFire responded "don't you know anything. Watch South Park, only Mormons can get in to heaven."

The rest of the aspies responded "you do it GoatOnFire!"

GoatOnFire responded "but I'm not a Mormon."

"WHAT?!?!?! How can you say that that is the way if you're not a Mormon."

"Don't ask questions, human."

A fight appeared like it was going to break out, the many atheist aspies looked enraged. Until somebody found a copy of the Bible for the Church of Latter Day Saints lying around somewhere.

The aspies gathered around it and tried to figure out how to convert to Mormonism. Ironically, the Wiccan Kilroy was the one who succeeding first in converting to Mormonism.

Kilroy prayed to God, and this time He responded.

"God. Is that you?"

"NO s**t SHERLOCK."

"sorry, God are you answering our prayers."

"YES"

"so, are you going to help us out of this mess?"

"MY ANSWER IS... NO"

"What?!?!"

"PSYCH!"

"So you are going to help us?"

"NO, I'LL SEND JESUS THOUGH."

Then Jesus Christ appeared in the room in a brilliant flash.

Most of the aspies looked in disbelief. Then some spoke up and asked "what are you going to do."

Jesus responded. "Well, there's not much I can do for you in my human form. I can turn this barrel of water into a barrel of heroin and then we can all get high, though."

Then the aspies started to party, although a few refused to take drugs with Jesus and they got worried, "well what are we going to do to get out of this mess?"

Jesus suddenly like he had read their mind and stood up and said "ok, what we need to do to get out of this is... Arggh! Screw you guys, none of you are true believers! And I'm not coming back until the Rapture which is still a few years away" Then Jesus disappeared. Under the influence of heroin Kilroy forgot that he was now a Mormon.

The aspies then got mad at Kilroy who was folding under the pressure, until he came up with an idea. "Hey, aren't some of the member of WP not aspies? Maybe we can contact some of them on the outside for help..."