Any Aspies/High Functioning Autistics living on their own?

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I was a late bloomer so to speak. I moved out of my father's house at age 28. I feel that it was very bad for me to have lived with a parent that long as he stifled me from making friends and dating, plus babied me too much and slowed my maturing rate. He used to get jealous if I would come in late (as in 9 pm) because I went out with a friend and he didn't like anyone calling me because he wanted to be my best friend. I think he has Aspergers too.

I moved out with a roommate/lover and have to say it was a bad experience. Sharing living quarters with non-family is worse than with family. I felt she kept me from pursuing my hobbies, always bitched about what I was doing or eating and would not allow me to watch anything on tv I wanted too. She also complained everytime I had an asthma attack or breathed heavy. So its a matter of do you want to live with someone like that?

I'm much happier the past 9 years that I have lived alone (with pets). My place is not tidy and looks very much like a place that a person with Aspergers and Brain Injury would live in says my occupational therapist. But hey its home and I can sit here in the afternoon typing to you in my pj's with the tv also blaring while eating ice cream and there is no one fussing at me. I also have friends now that I was not allowed when I lived with my parents or with my roommate. That is friends that are eccentric in their own ways and don't come bug me at the door, but just call me when they want to go out for dinner or a movie or something.

So the best thing is like the others have said, secure yourself a decent paying job and find yourself a small apartment and live alone!! ! Getting a cat of course is optional, but is what most Aspies benefit greatly from. Feline companions are so much more pleasant than the average humans.

I much prefer living on my own. Living with my parents made me nuts, and alot of that was due to Asperger's. I had an apartment with a roommate, but it didn't work out. Since then I lived for about 10 years in apartments, and I recently got my own house. Even an apartment was too close to other people for me, I would hear them move around, and I couldn't play my music loud. Your own house is the best thing. I have so much room, that several times, I have taken in friends that needed help, but that is hard to handle. One of them was also autistic, which was easier to some degree. I am lucky to have a good career and income.

I moved out of home permantently when I was 19, left at 18 to return within months because I was not looking after myself and seemed to have a breakdown probably my first of many. I left by going to university, I argued so much with my folks it stressed me too much so after one summer at home I never returned. I have only lived on 'my own' for the last 18 months before then I have lived with room mates, friends, bedsits and the like. At age 30 I finally got a council flat (social housing low cost), I had housing support for a year which helped me settle in and keep on top of bills and problems so on. I just don't get on with living with other people because of the noise, the meltdowns, the upset in my routines. It is so good to shut the door and the world out to have a small space that I can call my own. I mess up some, I struggle to keep up with chores, slow to recognise and do anything about repairs (excutive disfunction and a depression/mania). I work and finally have a little money to make my place my own, I always by a little something for my flat each month from a funky purple shag pile £3 in a charity shop to a new big widescreen tele. This month buy was a mop and bucket, seriously took my this long to get a proper mop bucket but not before my floor is getting ruined from all the water from when I mop the floor. I don't understand why my sister stays at home, she gets so stressed by parents and is so obessessive moody all the time because she has to control everything with her ways and routines (another aspie!) she has a good job earns well, nice boyfriend whats money for freedom and sanity if you can't buy rent teaches you responsibility.

I require neither.

Be careful, though. I recently "escaped" from a low-income, disabled housing situation. The place looked deceptively nice, but it turned out to be a hell-hole! The acoustics were awful; you could hear other people's stupid televisions and stereos, etc. Plus, there were a lot of people living there with prison records, and drug problems. There were some tenants who would pull the fire alarm for fun, and the noise would send me into meltdowns, every time.

Not meaning to scare you off. There may be really nice places out there. I guess the low income element attracted some of the worst people. I found that instead of living in a place that was meant for low income disabled, that getting a private rental and asking for certain accommodations, worked a lot better for me.

I can't say I have ever lived "by myself" but I can easily say I live an independent life. Been living with my husband since I was 23 (fiance at the time).. but before that I lived with my parents. I was ready to live on my own since I was 18 but.. $$ was an issue obviously.

I left home when I was about 21 and couldn't stand to ever go back to that situation. I lived with partners and in group houses until about 10 years ago, when I moved out on my own with my son. Group houses were extremely stressful - constantly demanding of attention and exhausting. I made so many mistakes - like taking on too many renters because I couldn't say no, and ending up sleeping on the kitchen floor. Living with my son is as close to living on my own as I can get, and it's brilliant. Like some of the others here, the housekeeping gets left behind, but the space, and being able to have your own routines is brilliant. Money is a big thing though. I've struggled with motherhood and worklife over the years, but I've now found the perfect balance.

I moved to boarding school at 12 and never went home. Unlike some of the other folks, I liked my parents but I liked being alone more. I worked some miserable jobs to keep a roof over my head somtimes. I struggled with all the different house things until I made a schedule. It CAN be done.

I'm not quite alone now - I have a spouse and child - but I still have my own space and life within the house.

I am living on my own, my parents help out with bills, I help them out with work around the house. I am taking correspondence courses for comic book art. I have a part-time job which at least pays some bills. I am hoping to be able to submit some of my work to DC, Marvel or Image. Mr Jinx helps keep things from being too lonely.

Yep....he was one cool cat, that Mr Jinx!

I live by myself, but my parents give me some financial help. I also have a 2 part-time jobs and I go to school.

Even though I've been "on my own", working, and pursuing various degrees for over ten years, I have never been financially independent. During most of that time, I lived with boyfriends who charged me very low rent and helped me out in many other ways too.

The problem with that situation is that if you become unhappy in the relationship, you have to just put up with it and pretend to be content (which feels like a form of prostitution) or become homeless or call people such as relatives and beg for assistance. All options are degrading to at least some extent.

The other problem is that whenever you rely on anyone for financial help, they have the ability to exercise a lot of control over you should they choose to. I think that relationships that involve financial dependence have a tendency to become complicated by this problem in some form / degree (though it can be subtle).

Even though I am approaching "middle age", my family still has a bigger influence on my life than I would like. They get to say, "We'll help pay your tuition if you go for this degree, but not that one," etc. This has been a bad influence, but it has allowed me to survive without relying completely on men . . . (BTW, in my current relationship, we're keeping our finances as separate as possible and we may never live together.)

I am by nature far more independent than most people, but because of a few AS traits that tend to get in the way of normal "functioning", I can only hope that one day I'll be totally independent on a practical level.

I have taken a serious look around my house.....

eeek!! !

I have never purchased furniture!

OMG!! !

How did the furniture I do have - get here?

I don't remember!!

but who cares?

I'm getting rid of the whole sorry lot!

Zen.

(my new living room)
except I don't live there....in my living room that is....

(should I be ashamed?.....)

I ask this: as I look at a picture I have on the wall......of me and mine....(at the opening of the Go-train).....jeez!! !

I look like a big kid.....(a big kid with wrinkles)..........same buck teeth....

and - dang it....

no - furniture

I am a little (no - very freked out!! !)

......
whoooooosa......

there's a blue sky......


and the sun is shining....

if I want to sit down...
I can.....(anywhere....and all/where)


.....there is no hope for me....

I don't know how to buy furniture.......

but -

the outside of the house looks da**m good!! !

I moved out when I was 18. I moved into the college dorm. Came home for the summer. Then I studied abroad for a year-- went great and lived in university housing, in a house with others. Came home for a shorter summer. Then I got an apartment with a couple of roomates but we had separate leases and it was a place where all utilities were included and the place was furnished and they also did roomate matching. I lived there for three years-- it was the next most logical step for me. I did buy a few smaller bits of furniture. I got a rabbit.

If I hadn't gotten married after that, then I would have moved into an apartment where the utilities were not included and where it was not furnished and so forth. Maybe live alone.

But I did get married then and I moved into my husband's house-- we own.

The finances can be the most difficult part. That and the various chores and keeping up with stuff-- its so easy to be lazy about stuff or have trouble prioritizing. I think it is important to try and be strict with oneself. At least about the imporant things. And it is nice living on my own.

We have a dog. I can fit lots of ice cream in the freezer- we can eat dinner later in the evening, and sometimes I eat cookies in bed (but this leaves crumbs so then I usually want to change the sheets), and no one complains that I have too many books (well not much). While my husband does complain that I do fall asleep with the light on and then drop the book I am reading-- he doesn't yell about it regularily. And he never yells that I am clumsy like my mother did. And no putting up with roomates who don't do the dishes-- just tell my husband when it is his turn and I am not cooking anything until he does.

The second point is especially key.

I was dxd at 49. My parents died when I was 21 so I had to learn fast. I have made a lot of mistakes along the way and I got into deep financial messes. I have been the neighbour from hell with a yard and house that I could not keep up and even though I have learned a lot, there are still times when I can't cope but I would rather live like this than be dependent on other people. Living alone can be hard but there are a heap of benefits. I eat food I like, not food that is expected eg i like soup for breakfast. I like to eat the meat and then a few hours later I have vegetables. I like desert first. I can read while I eat. If I dont shower for 4 days, nobody complains. its worth the hassles of forgotten bills etc.

I got my own place 3 years ago at the age of 39. Prior to that I was living with a friend at his house for the cheaper rent more then i could not live on my own even tho I would have had issues. Lived with his mother-in-law after he remarried and the house they bought didnt's 't have enough room and that when he was going through is divorce with his first who caused issues with him paying for the house I loaned him quite a bit of money. After he lost it I moved in with him and his gf soon to be wife at an apt for 6 months till they bought a house. since he was into me for quite a bit I didn't pay rent at the apt or after I moved in with her for over a year. Finally decided that I needed my own place and other people thought I should to. She was a bit of a nut case and had wanted me to get a place with her kid who was on his own but had issues and didn't drive after a couple of dui's in a short time. I didn't want to do that even thought the plan was for me to say drive him to the supermarket and things like that but I would have wound up doing more then that plus since he was always home (wasn't working) I would have never had the place to myself. Was happy at the first place but 2 years after I had money issues due to some out of work issues. Moved in with my brother for several months which was ok and then got another place of my own and I'm very hapy being on my own. Can do what I want and it's nice when I'm not feeling social not having to deal with other people at home.