25 Apr 2009, 10:14 pm
The socializing required in being a parent is a nightmare. It took me more than a year just to be able to drop them off at school without being shattered for the rest of the day. Talking to their teachers still fills me with dread.
However i do not regret having children. I'm not going to have anymore even though I always dreamed of having a huge family (as in as big as the Duggars!
) but I am well beyond my capacity with the children I have.
If your dream is to have children... do it! But space them apart if you are willing to (if I could re-arrange my life I would put 5 years between all of them... but the ones close in age tend to latch onto each other and be good friends, so maybe I shouldn't wish to change that)... and recruit as much help as you can... teachers, babysitters if you can afford it, grandparents, your husband/ partner. Don't hesitate to farm out the job as much as you can so that you can retreat and recover.
To the person who mentioned "overpopulation," reproduction in the developed world is below replacement rate, the only thing holding up populations in europe and britain is immigration and their children... but that is another thread.
03 May 2009, 4:23 am
I wish our reproductive rate was below replacement, we're already far too many to even replace. We need to diminish quite a bit to return to a world that supports civilizations that provide mental sustenance, not captivity.
Anyway, it's probably obvious that I agree with TobyZ, I'm against everyone having children (just a child is ok) at this point. If you would like to satisfy your desire to nurture, work in a day care or become a preschool teacher. Apply to be foster parents. Even adopt, sure. Especially with the mental problems you describe, why cause another to suffer? Let's take care of the people already here.
On a personal value level, I don't think simply wanting children is a good reason to have them. You're not creating a child, you're creating a person. Many people create more of themselves for selfish reasons. 
