Which Conditions did you consider before AS?

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As far as significant mental conditions, I knew that I had suffered from depression. And even though that was self-diagnosed, there is no question about that. I have had significant depressive episodes for very long periods of time.

I knew that when I was growing up that many people would call me crazy and many different people would do and say mean things to me, and I knew that I had very significant sensory issues that other people would tell me I was exaggerating.

I had never met anyone who was like me, and I thought that I was actually crazy and that there was something wrong with me. I never considered looking at other people's explanations of what might be different about me, because I almost never consider the perspectives of other people.

I only found out about AS after finding this site.

Anxiety, depression, ptsd, shyness, just plain weird, ocd, social anxiety, agoraphobia, hypochondria, pmdd, overly sensitive.

I don't know what triggered it, but I had the thought of "maybe I have mild autism" but I never researched it and was hesitant to because I though people would think I was doing it to get attention. When I finally researched it and read about Asperger's... it just clicked. It explained everything "weird" about me. Sensory issues, social issues, emotional issues, medication issues. Instead of being in 11 different boxes I was in one with the other issues being caused by it. Which makes way more sense to me.

inatentive non hyperactive ADD, anxiety & depression. the funny thing is, my anxiety causes my depression which confuses doctors because they think it has to be depression causing the anxiety i think.

I was diagnosed with depression and an eating disorder. I also had a therapist blame my problems relating to others on my being raised by an alcoholic and having a turbulent home-life while growing up.

All three of these things were accurate, to an extent, but I knew they didn't explain the full picture. So, in my early 20's, I started psychologist-hopping, in hopes I'd eventually find a professional who could tell me what was 'wrong' with me. One suggested 'Avoidant Personality Disorder' and I became a member of an Avoidant Personality Disorder online support group, but what the members there were saying about their experiences didn't fully 'click' with me. (When I questioned his diagnosis of me, though, the psych told me I must just be 'in denial' about my personality disorder, lol).

One day a member of that support group announced he wouldn't be posting anymore because he'd recently been diagnosed with AS and felt his personality disorder had been a misdiagnosis. I had never heard of AS, so I researched it and it really seemed to fit. So, I went through testing with an ASD specialist and she confirmed it.

I've been diagnosed with social anxiety and generalized anxiety disorders as well as bi polar and anorexia.
I've been called a robot most of my life and I just thought it was a personality trait. It never occurred to me that I was insensitive until I married my second husband who has quite a long list of inappropriate things I've said or done. I never intentionally try to hurt anyone, unfortunately I often do. So for a long time I thought "Maybe I'm just a jerk!"

I was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety when I was 5, AS when I was 26, and PTSD about a year ago. I don't think any of them are wrong.

I had a Bipolar diagnosis for twelve years. The diagnosis never fit me well, but it was a relief to have a name for what I was experiencing. I always felt cheated that I experienced a great deal of depression but never the manic elation. I gradually took myself off of most of the medications. My girlfriend at the time suggested that Asperger's made more sense for me and the psychologist I consulted agreed.

Throughout middle school and high school I thought I was dyslexic and then figured I also had ADD and probably Anxiety and/or Bi-Polar disorder. RIght before I started looking into AS and High-Functioning Autism I was pondering wether or not I had a borderline personality disorder. . . None of these quite fit completely since it seemed like I had slight symptoms of multiple disorders but didn't have all the symptoms of one particular thing. I've known a few autistic children (severe cases for most of them) and growing up I always felt a personal connection to them but autism never occurred to me because for the most part I seemed pretty normal. It was only a few weeks ago that I stumbled upon some info about AS and it instantly clicked All of my symptoms finally fell into one category and there were even issues that I never thought were connected to any kind of disorder (isues such as eye contact, inability to maintain social relationships, etc.) I was actually really relieved to be able to place all of my eccentricities into one box.

First diagnosed with dyslexia (aged 13-15), then depression (aged 17-18) and finally aspergers (aged 19-20).

The depression is still with me (possibly linked to the aspergers)

On a more recent assessment (mid 20s) for dyslexia (to try to get extra time in exams) I was found to be above average in terms of reading and writing so this probably does not apply.

Last edited by xmh on 07 Sep 2011, 2:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

Hi everyone,
I have tried to sign up to WrongPlanet a couple of times, always lost the inspiration, but I will try to give this a shot.

I was drawn to this thread because I too, was 'clueless Aspie', if I may coin a term. I am 40, self-diagnosed 11 months ago and the shock still has not faded.

The reason I decided to make this my first post here was the absolutely, incredibly - near identical stories to my own. Nearly every single post on this thread touches on some part - some in whole - of my story. I can save myself a ton of blather and tangents by just pointing to a few posts. I should also mention, this is a theme with me and WrongPlanet. I occasionally come here to read the forums to sort of 'confirm' the diagnosis, and I am never, ever failed.
I know what I am now, but I suffered a life of horrible sadness. I always knew something was up, but like others here, was more or less just convinced that I was 'quirky', 'unique', 'a mad-scientist type'.
As more and more in my life went wrong, the problems just never quite seemed to really match up with simple depression, schizoidism, bi-polar, borderline personality, social anxiety - all of them matched, with the exception that the typical treatments never really cured me of, well, 'me'.

It has caused me intense depression because I am high functioning, i.e. highly intelligent. I have been told all of my life that I was an underachiever, a loser, basically, a bad person. I love learning, I love electronics and computers and programming and everything aspies seem to lean towards - but I could never make a single buck doing any of those things, because, to be blunt and put it in very simple terms - I am not NT. I'm just not and I refused to be before I even knew what the hell Aspergers Syndrome was. I am me, and I was proud of it until recently.

Recently, my country let me down. I won't get political, that is off-topic and pointless, but my country let me down and I am ashamed to be me anymore.
I was a hard worker earning good pay in an underemployed profession that i just happen to like. I settled in about 18 years ago and the pay has simply tanked since 2001.

I really just had to post when I saw this from kotshka:
'When I finally learned about AS I felt first an overwhelming relief as I finally knew with 100% certainty what was wrong and always had been wrong, that I wasn't crazy, that I'm not a hypochondriac. This was slowly followed with horror at the realization that there's not much I can do about it. There's no real treatment, and most of my problems will stay with me forever. Schizophrenia and narcolepsy can be treated with a pill. AS just takes a lifetime of training that can never be fully effective.'
-- That is sort of my feelings in a nutshell. It took a couple months to really sink in, I even delved into intense research on schizoidism and Borderline personality - nope, differentiating diagnoses confirmed - you are AS sir.

I must say though, had one shrink diagnose me as Schizophrenic and that scared the bejeesus out of me at the time (about 20 years ago). I started studying the DSM after that, and became my own doctor. I mainly thought I was depressed with psychotic features at worst, if even that. After a lot of research, years and years of research - I self-diagnosed with 100% certainty (with childhood history included). I am proud to say I have not had a single symptom of Schizophrenia since that diagnosis by that quack.

Knowledge is power, and that quote from Einstein by vintagedoll is where it's at.

Well my family always made me feel like I had a character defect growing up because I was different so I kind of bought into that for a lot of years until mid 20's. Then I started having really bad anxiety attacks for about 10 years and thought I was a social phobe. Then I was depressed alternating with shut down for about 15 years. Then I found WP and thought wow, I've been beating myself up for 50 years, it's time to stop and breathe a bit, there may actually be a reason other than I'm not trying hard enough. The more I read, the more it makes sense. For the first time in many years, I am trying to relax a bit and reconnect with people including my family and it's slow but good.

I've read you can have both ADD and Aspergers simulteanously. I was diagnosed with ADD and certainly fit much of the criteria but also certainly qualify for Aspergers. BTW, I'm jealous your status above your avatar reads "velociraptor". Not fair!

Which conditions did I consider? avoidant personality disorder was the one that fitted the most

I was diagnosed as having schizophrenia as they didn't know what else to call it. Noone really believe that's what it was but noone was willing to change it, 7 yrs ago i worked it out for myself. Took until a fortnight ago to get it confirmed that I am autistic.

I'm still fighting to get rid of the schizophrenia diagnosis but im hoping it won't be hard to convince them now i have this diagnosis instead.

Extreme shyness and general bad attitude as a kid/teen.

Teen/young adult was still the shyness/[social] anxiety/depression, agoraphobia and panic disorder.

My mum also told me last week that she suspected I was a little autistic as a kid but because, I guess, it was the 80's and 90's jack all was done about it. Apart from having hearing tests all the time.

Like many others - I always knew there was something. So I always blamed my parents. I asked myself why they hadn't crewed up my sister though?! I then decided it was because they loved her and hated me!

I carried this belief for years because I knew there was something - and I didn't know what else it could be.

Over the years while my sister was happily married and being a great mum, wife, friend, home maker, etc, etc.
I was failing in relationships - unable to keep ties with family and friends. It was hurting very much and I was just so upset and angry - it was so unfair - I knew that I just couldn't help it! I didn't have a clue how to keep people close!

The best part of life was my son (though I do want to point out that this meant a huge amount of responsibility and constant exhausting effort to be a grown-up) here was this little person who didn't know that I was weird - so he didn't go away. He stuck around.

At this point I'm starting to go on about my history too much so to cut it short and leaving big gaps I started to think Avoidant personality or Borderline personality disorder by my 40's. I can't remember what led me to Asperger's but I ended up here about year and half ago. And yes light bulbs were going on left right and centre

The good thing is I'm not so angry with my parents now - they didn't know!