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Summer_Twilight
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11 Oct 2012, 10:27 am

Hi,
I was wondering how many other people in here have been gone without ever having a special someone in their lives.

I happen to be one of them who has never had a special someone in life ever. I see most of my other friends and they seem to have had that opportunity. How many of you have had that?



PTSmorrow
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11 Oct 2012, 10:34 am

I've been living with a woman in my early twenties and hated it. Afterwards i knew at least that I need my own territory and can't share it with a biped. Affairs are okay for me, but I'm basically not interested in a relationship.



Summer_Twilight
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11 Oct 2012, 10:54 am

It usually does not bother me but lately, it has been bothering me that I have never hate a special someone.



redrobin62
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11 Oct 2012, 12:14 pm

<--- Perpetually alone.



Summer_Twilight
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11 Oct 2012, 3:06 pm

I don't mind being single now actually. However, I am sad that I never got to opportunity to go out on dates in the past during the last 14 years of my life. I don't understand why no one has taken the initiative to ask me out.



ghoti
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11 Oct 2012, 3:12 pm

Always alone. Never had a relationship nor dated. Don't mind that that except for the constant reminders that i should be happily married with children at this stage and those reminders can be depressing though it shouldn't because they are just trying to push their values onto me.



Summer_Twilight
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11 Oct 2012, 3:47 pm

It sometimes upsets me that I don't have someone because my best friend is married with a wonderful husband. I would like to go on a double date with them with a nice guy.

My friend and their husband go on neat adventures



poopylungstuffing
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11 Oct 2012, 4:46 pm

I am the polar opposite and it can still feel lonesome



kinako2
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12 Oct 2012, 2:56 am

Wanted an LTR once upon a time, as much as being happy. Stopped when I realized my ASD and other conditions were overwhelming and began to withdraw for fear of being rejected yet again.

Been so long since my last LTR ('98) that it's more or less give-or-take if it happens, but I do feel lonesome from time to time, and know my social skills are far underdeveloped from the isolation. Therapy will give tools and skills to use them.


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ALguy1957
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12 Oct 2012, 3:05 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Hi,
I was wondering how many other people in here have been gone without ever having a special someone in their lives.

I happen to be one of them who has never had a special someone in life ever. I see most of my other friends and they seem to have had that opportunity. How many of you have had that?


I was never even interested in dating or women until after a cousin got me on facebook. At least now I use dating sites and have met a few nice women, even got intimate with one for a few months. And I was already 52 whan I started all this. But I really do want someone to grow old with now.



Summer_Twilight
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12 Oct 2012, 11:56 am

I had a major meltdown 9 years when one of my sisters brought her first boyfriend over to my parents house. My mom and my sister wanted to introduce him and I wanted to meet him too. However, my dad was worried that I would get jealous if they brought him around. Yes, I did get jealous and over reacted.

At the same time, my sister was not very considerate when he came over. She hid behind the bushes near the front door and waited when he came to to door. I went to answer it when he knocked, and that was when she snuck up and gave him a hug. She also snuggled all over him in front of me while acting really cocky and patronizing. "Sis, you're really cool. *Snuggle, snuggle* This touched my buttons to the core. So I said some things to her that were not nice.

I also admit here that I was frustrated that I did not have a chance to have that special someone.



MrStewart
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12 Oct 2012, 11:09 pm

Have not dated or had relationships. I never wanted to connect with another person like that. The concept is sort of alien to me. It's not that I don't understand the appeal, just more that for me, in my life, I don't see how or why that would be a good thing for me. In my teens and early twenties I wanted to have sex at some point just for the experience, but at the same time worried that I would be very uncomfortable with that level of contact. Not just the intimacy, but the actual physical contact, proximity, worries about whether the other person is adequately hygienic. The desire to try that has decreased in recent years. I am happy to be alone for the rest of my life. Would prefer it that way.

Most distressing part of this is family. My mother in particular. Prodding questions. Blatant appeals for more grandkids. Shut up, you already have two! I'm off the hook on that! :x

Perhaps a pet, at some point, would be productive. Something that has thoughts and feelings of its own living with me. I could manage a cat, I think. I had dogs at home when I was a kid. I know that one of those would be more responsibility than I am capable of handling. A cat. Yes. Will consider that.



Palakol
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13 Oct 2012, 1:11 am

Sometimes I still think about it. I just don't see it happening though.



muntanmion
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13 Oct 2012, 4:34 am

I'm 58 years old, and, except for brief periods of dating people years ago and assorted other sexual experiences, have never really been in a relationship. Haven't made any attempts in those directions in nearly two decades, and have adapted well to this reality. I live by myself, am self-supporting, and had the companionship of two adorable dogs for most of that time, which made it easier. I used to feel agonizingly lonely, and burned with envy at the seeming ease with which other people I knew met lovers and mates. Luckily, I've had enough friendship, stability, good meds, amusements and mental health resources within reach to have made much of my despair about being a "Forever Alone" fade away.

Interestingly enough, I feel far more capable of having a relationship with someone currently than I ever did. I've worked my balls off over the years to acquire better "executive functioning" habits and develop social skills that I was deficient in when I was younger, as well as persisting in looking for and finding skilled help for my personal collection of comorbidities (otherwise known as my "family curse"), mild Asperger's being the latest trophy on that shelf.


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hurtloam
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13 Oct 2012, 4:26 pm

I've never been in a relationship. Sometimes I feel sad that I haven't had that opportunity, but i'm happy living on now own, so I can't complain. It seems natural to be on my own now. I don't know how I would cope with a relationship.

The thing that really gets to me is when well meaning relatives ask, 'so have you found a man yet?' it makes me feel like a failure.

I'm not sure I will ever meet anyone I can stand enough to be around everyday. Any roommate i've had in the past has been difficult for me to live with. I know it's not the same, but it makes me suspicious about whether I would actually enjoy a relationship.



kittygirl0811
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13 Oct 2012, 4:31 pm

I've been on a few dates when I was 18 but none since then (I'm 35 now) and I've never had a long-term relationship. Most of the time it doesn't bother me but sometimes I do get lonely.