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Thank you Greentea.

Open dialogue is the technique I use since it is required for every technique I've ever used. So yeah, that would be included.

You can claim your marriage is perfect and does not have guilt trips or rewards going on in it all you want, but I'm a doubting it. I could be wrong, but still I'm a doubtinher.

Her model was only a small wittle portion of my whole picture.

I do have experience being on welfare as stated. So my opinion, validated. Working 40 hours a week for a corporation to support your family...again validated. Been there and done that. Nature of marriages whose core nature is nothing like mine, then it isn't a marriage you speak of, or it's probably more dysfunctional than what I'm dealing with because see, I deal with my problems rather than pretending they don't exist or pretending I'm on such a high horse that I'm too good to deal with them.

and on


I can't really speak my whole mind here. But to sum up that arguments is basically, you are not a mom so therefore you wouldn't know everything being a mom entails. Saspie does not sound like an idiot to me. I really believe if she wore my shoes for a week, her opinions would be very different than what she's stating.

To suggest other factors at play is disingenous? No, what really lacks sincerity is when someone tells you that you are wrong and you are a horrible person for handling a situation the way you are handling it, and I know absolutely nothing about your situation nor do I want to and because of you, I really don't want to, and to be honest, I just don't think I can handle your situation so I avoid it, but I still have a strong opinion about what you should do.

I do know I'm doing my best at raising my kids. Other people's opinions do matter though, and your best isn't always good enough. You do or you don't in this world. THere is no such thing as try. Doctors, Landlords, social workers, etc. all of them have an opinion about my ability to take care of my family. If their opinion of me is shy of decent, they are required by law to start the process to have my abilities investigated by complete morons in a completely political and biased world who have the power to remove my children from my home no matter if my kids need it or not (we call it CPS). it won't stop there. When my kids are in the school system, everyone's opinion of me will reflect on my kids (the way they view my kids, and the way they treat them). Law enforcement (very small town here) will be the same way. It's called creating an image of yourself, and it's very important in an NT world, but you are more than welcome to jump on the Aspergia bandwagon if you don't like it.

You are staying in a crappy relationship. It is very different to what I would do. I would not tell a man to change or I'd leave him. I'd leave someone so as to not change them. People rarely change.



I can say what I want. I think your methods are unacceptable. It's my opinion. You don't agree. Big deal.



That is not a technique, that is my opinion. If you do not like it, you cannot just claim I am using some psychological trick on you. That doesn't make sense. I could say the reverse about you but I think it is fine for those to express their opinions. I am not attacking you, I am attacking your methods. You seem to have a real problem with someone disagreeing with you and I cannot work out why... I never said my mother was better than you, I used her as an example of how things can work out after marriage break ups. But of course, she is my mother and I think the world of her so if you must know I do think she is better than you, but she is better than all mothers I know

Anyway you keep reading things into my posts that simply are not there. I say exactly what I mean but you keep saying I am implying things. I really dislike to talk to people like that as it is so unproductive so I'll leave it here.

Whether you realize it or not, and whether you intended it or not, you still use the same methods that you argue are awful methods to use.

Those are some really wild assumptions. Where did I say that my relationship doesn't have issues? How did you get the idea that I feel that I'm "too good to deal with them"?

I think I get it now. You're frustrated and backed into a corner, so your only option is to fling mud. Why are you so desperately trying to prove that you are right to people who simply aren't going to agree with you? It's probably better off for this thread to simply end.

So are you saying your approach to the argument being, "I"m right and you're wrong, end of discussion" is much more successful than my appraoch? At least in your approach, whose the dog and whose the master is much more obvious.

There's that saying... it goes like this:

I've already gotten my hands muddier than I would like. Have a great day.

See, now you are making me hungry. I love pork

Either way, I have no problem with people disagreeing with me. But it's one thing to say, "well I don't care for how you put it" or even "that advice isn't for me," but it's another thing to say, "You are all these bad things for saying this or thinking that." You and a few others didn't just disagree with me. No y'all judged me. Sorry if I stood up for myself there and threw some mud your way... I was only returning what was already yours.

I was just eating the chicken club from McDonalds, and they cooked that bacon to perfection. Now I really really want another one, but like without the chicken and cheese...yeah, just the BLT, and better on a McMuffin than that bun. MMMMmmmmmMMMMmmmmmMMMMMmmmmmm..