Older Aspie, what skills did your parents teach you?

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MsTriste
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04 May 2007, 9:17 am

sinsboldly wrote:
Mescalero wrote:
You had silverware?

Maybe a regional language confusion. In US we call all utensils silverware, regardless of whether there's actual silver content.

Quote:
"clean as you go is the sign of a pro," is how I learned, Mescal when you cook, keep a dish pan going in the sink and just wash and rinse and put measuring cups and tasting spoons and what ever into the dish drainer. Dump out the dishwater when it starts to get translucent and losing it's bubble. Use hot water and pretend you like the bubbles and then swab out the sink when you are done and if you think about it, put a table spoon or so into the drains after you dump the final dishwater to keep the drains sweet.

make sure you have a good broom, one with an angled brush bottom and a dust pan that doesn't have a gap between the flat part and the floor ( usually a rubber flange edge) and sweep the kitchen floor and use a damp sponge mop to get the crusties off near the sink and where ever you have chopped stuff, mixed stuff and in front of the sink. That will at least start some good habits, and you can do well to preseverate with good habits.

the one think you have to remember is NEVER LEAVE IT UNTIL LATER.

There is no 'Later'


Merle


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calandale
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04 May 2007, 10:07 am

The biggest thing that I learned from
my folks was violence. Not that either
of them comes close to what I am,
but my dad acts far more violent
than I do, and my mother is truly
sociopathic. This turned out to be
VERY helpful in getting me through
HS, without going on a killing rampage,
but hasn't been to great since.

I also learned to be certain that anyone
I'm with is damned near perfect for me,
as they are such an awful match.



lemon
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04 May 2007, 3:40 pm

mother (not the real one, but the one who raised me) : useful:
sewing, knitting, typing, baking cake, tidy wardrobe and cupboards, keep the bath and toilet clean, how to clean the cupper things( handy when it comes to cleaning my trumpet), to be polite,not to spill food nor money, speak with a decent accent, not to give in easy, giving arguments, be strong as a woman, she realised that she did certain things wrong in our education, the fact that she told me that made a whole difference for me. (unfortunatly she died years ago)
but also (not very useful): how to depress
and certainly not : how to treat your husband or how to raise children

father (her husband): a little filming, how to run away from things, how to charm people and how that can rescue you, sawing(?not sure whether that's the correct word) wood,
socialising (a little), the cosiness of watching television together(occasionally), the fact that you can do your own projets how small they might be (even if they don't become a huge success)
unfortunatly: smoking (me for more than twenty years, and he now has lungcancer)



9CatMom
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04 May 2007, 10:14 pm

My mom introduced me to books and reading practically from the time I was born. She always talked to me as if were an adult, and didn't use mushy baby talk.

Our family always had pets. They were my constant companions throughout my life. They still are.



Eclair
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04 May 2007, 10:54 pm

9CatMom wrote:
My mom introduced me to books and reading practically from the time I was born. She always talked to me as if were an adult, and didn't use mushy baby talk.

Our family always had pets. They were my constant companions throughout my life. They still are.


"Manners"...they were apparently very important.
Not to swear...again, see manners.
Be nice to people....again see manners.
Sharing...again see manners.

Well, they tried to teach me anyway.

They taught me what practical things they could, but I've always felt very different from them even though they tried their best for the most part.

I think I hatched from an egg.



postpaleo
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04 May 2007, 10:57 pm

Always look both ways.

Took me a while to see he ment it in more then one way. Lol, the irony.


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mv
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14 Mar 2012, 8:55 am

BazzaMcKenzie wrote:
Mescalero wrote:
Any tips on keeping on top of my dishes, much appreciated

get 2 dishwashers. Then you don't need cupboards for them. lol



I have only one dishwasher. It looks exactly like me. :wink:



BuyerBeware
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14 Mar 2012, 7:09 pm

My Aspie Dad taught me damn near everything I know.

A lot of what he didn't teach me, my NT husband and my stepmom, who is neurologicallly atypical in her own way (she had a stroke as a toddler and unknowingly lived her whole life with literally half a brain), did.

Daddy taught me a hell of a lot. Changing tires, balancing a checkbook, cooking a nutritionally sound meal, keeping house, that I could actually do stuff.

But probably the most valuable thing he taught me was to like myself the way I am, never mind if people are laughing at me behind my back (or to my face, for that matter). And if they want to diss me, in Daddy's words, "f**k 'em if they can't take a joke."


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Az29
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15 Mar 2012, 4:25 am

Eclair wrote:

"Manners"...they were apparently very important.
Not to swear...again, see manners.
Be nice to people....again see manners.
Sharing...again see manners.



^This and also my parents taught me that it was okay to be different.

My dad was very very anti-drugs and made it clear we would be in huge trouble if he ever found out we touched so much as a cigarette. It worked because I have never touched drugs and see no reason to, I did try smoking (peer pressure) but didn't like it and alcohol was another passing phase. My brother tried his best but all of his peers were taking drugs and smoking so he ended up having weed a few times and is now a smoker. He did his best to hide it from my parents though, I knew he was smoking from around age 15, he didn't dare let my parents know until he was about 23 and even then he was a bit wary about smoking infront of them. It's funny really because both of them were heavy smokers (my mum still smokes a little now, my dad quit about 6 years ago).

They were both very adamant that we had to get married and settled before having kids and that a happy marriage was one of the most important things you can have. Again quite hypocritical because they divorced when I was 8 because my dad cheated, I guess they didn't want me and my brother repeating their mistakes.

My parents didn't teach me anything practical, my mum couldn't cook (not from scratch, she would chuck chips in the oven and beans out of a can), she wasn't very good at sewing or anything like that so never taught me. My dad is very good at building/fixing things but never shared that knowledge. The only practical thing he taught me was how to re-format a computer and how to build one.


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tomboy4good
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15 Mar 2012, 3:48 pm

My parents taught me to be self-reliant. Oh wait! I learned that on my own too. Sorry, bit of sarcasm. I grew up in such a dysfunctional home that I had to learn to take care of myself or else. It wasn't a fun way to grow up as I had no one else that I could rely on. I am self taught in hygiene, cooking, cleaning, art, reading, photography, etc.

My dad is an aspie as well. He taught me all about his special interest, antiques, which he drilled into me even though I had zero interest. I learned all aspects of the business: running it, dealing with customers (though he wasn't always wonderful at it-mom was better at schmoozing), repair/restoration, etc. I still hate antiques some 25 years later. I dunno what mom was other than being difficult to get along with...oh wait, that was me! 8O


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Aspie Score: 173/200, NT score 31/200: very likely an Aspie
5/18/11: New Aspie test: 72/72
DX: Anxiety plus ADHD/Aspergers: inconclusive