When is it too late to "make something" of yourself?

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To Yakuzamonroe and Korts,

Have you ever seen It's a Wonderful Life? George Bailey doesn't think he ever made anything of himself because he didn't get to travel the world, and he had to work at the Building & Loan without promotions. He didn't earn much money and he felt like his life was a series of misfortunes. Without spoilers, George learns that his morality, charity, goodwill, and ability to learn from trial and error is all that's important in life. His life has affected many others in a positive way, and he is loved.

I absolutely agree with the premise of the movie.

Like you say, people can be eminently useful in many ways.

I think it’s never too late to pursue what you want to and what you’re passionate about. Grandma Moses didn’t start her painting career until she was in her 70’s.

I agree that everyone can contribute something. Even those who have significant or profound disabilities can positively impact the people around them to a great extent.

The only real success I have ever had in my life was that of love. That part of my life will forever be precious to me so I treasure those memories. Though with age and every passing moment, even those memories have begun to fade with time.

I want to thank everyone for their posts here. It really helps in helping me form a vision of what I think "making something" of myself should mean.

In so far as answer the question proposed in the thread, this video comes close:



I have a part-time job that pays decently well. It's not a lot (part-time, duh) but it meets my needs and I get a lot of time for what I really want to do - reading fiction and about literary theory and philosophy, writing, voice acting and, of course, getting much needed exercise. Personally, I think I want a life where my time is my own and give only A BIT of my time to work and spare the rest for my hobbies.

Wow! I guess I should feel proud I figured some of this important stuff out ... only took me just over 35 years ...

This was on my mind for a while too. Just I put the same question so that where is my place in the world or in society. I think that you can't make something out of yourself, because it is really relative so and too abstract what you mean when you say that you are somebody or achieved something. Yesterday accidentally i found a documentary about BS jobs and it really gave a perspective on sucsess. Some who has a 'great' job, with a super salary can still feel her/himself worthless if what he/she is doing doesn't make sense.
I think the solution would be rather that you should feel comfortable and useful in your occupation, and then it doesn't really matter if you have a high status job, and you live the high life, or 'just' work as a volunteer at an animal shelter. I don't say that it is easy to find our purpose, but once you got it everything else will seem to be meaningless (the social status, the salary, what others think about you)...

Out of pure curiosity: I've been thinking about this for the last half year, year: What do you think who contributes more to society, or who is more worth?
A, a high status bank manager/owner with a lot of money, a steady job
B, a homeless, without job, living of begging

And why?

I think I have a huge problem with judgement

I think that basing self-value on social status of a job is very common. I do not like this approach because it makes the value dependent on the outside perception of other people. Or what they see as useful. I prefer to value people for who they are as a person and how they treat their environment ... honest, true to themselves, caring, fair, responsible towards the environment and such stuff. What makes a person a personality. Same as I would like other people to like me for who I am as a person and not for the job or possessions that I have.

What is this, contribution to a society? Is it another value? Who has a say in what is good and what is bad? And what is their right to say so based upon? Is it based upon the amount of taxes one pays - then what about people with a good salary and an even better tax adviser? Is it about what one get and gives in return? I have huge difficulties to quantify such stuff. Therefore, I do have a problem in "rating" who contributes "more" to a society.

Maybe the bank manager who has a "high status" is a real as*hole at home with his family. I have met such people. And maybe there is a reason why the beggar is homeless. I've been homeless for a while in my life, too, and now have a well-paying job since 20 years. How you want to judge that? Just don't judge people, please. I have met homeless people who have been rejected so often in their life that they gave up struggling to be part of this "society". Some homeless people use the money they can get to buy alcohol, it is a short-time getaway from a terrible reality. Some homeless people use the money to feed their companion dog.

I have the same problem with rating people by the usefulness of a job, there is no absolute "value" to it ... think about a bank manager vs a garbage truck driver ... I saw first hand how important garbage removal jobs are when I was in Naples, Italy and these guys had been on strike for a while

Exactly. What I wanted to say is that, that you can't make something out of yourself because there isn't a standard description who is a 'somebody'. We all grew up in a world where people are judged upon their social status, on how much money they make, what their title is. A CFO or a whatever manager considered to have a higher status, and with it a higher income, than a nurse, or a teacher. But still you can go on with your life quite well without managers, but teachers and nurses are essencial, and we haven't talked about the load what the lifestyle of someone with a higher income (usually) puts on the environment compared to that of an average, or even a homeless person.
This was a tangent topic in the documentary I've mentioned before (it's worth watching https://www.vpro.nl/programmas/tegenlic ... tbaan.html it is in dutch but mostly they speak english I understood it despite of I barely speak any dutch At one point there was a survey, or research mentioned practically about the contribution to society, and they found that every pound that a banker made destroyed 7 pounds, that what it costs the public sector to repair the damage made by the actions of the banker ( a good example for this was here in Hungary when banks gave out loans in swissfranc and when the franc increased in value the depts multiplied with it too, the banks were making huge profits on the increased depts, and yes they payed the taxes for that, but in the end a lot of people lost their homes, and then the society had to jump in to minimize the damage but this was still devastating), and there is the other thing that each pound spent on a teachers loan, generates 7 or 9 pounds profit to the society. And still traditionally a banker is considered to have a higher status than a nurse, because we measure the succes, and worth of a human being in the money they make, the car they drive, and how good the title they posess sounds.
So I think what I mean is that we can't make somebody out of ourselves, we just have to try to find our way to be happy, and feel ourselves useful, and maybe try to minimize the damages on the way.

I work at a secure, stable employer that has good benefits. To make a long story short, when I first started I never understood how anyone could be depressed at such a position and how so many have alcohol or other addiction issues (seems to be a common theme in all my jobs). It is clear to me and I would never tell my son to follow in my footsteps (living the 'safe' life) and am getting more aggressive in going into entrepreneurship. My #1 regret in life is that I didn't 'swing of the fences' because I was terrified of failure. While I didn't exactly fail in life I could not in any way be considered a success story. Sure I get a steady roof over my head but at what cost to my mental health?

I am fortunate that I kept at my "safe" position, since I have a guaranteed income of more than what I'm making now after I turn 62.

I just don't have the entrepreneurial "flair" in me.

I don't know your exact situation, but I think this is a common trap and sooner or later everybody ends with this feeling.
It sounds like a conspiration theory but so far what I observed is: Usually children want to be a firefighter, a nurse, a policeman, doctor, teacher they want to help, to be a kind of a hero (usually badly paid jobs), as we grow up the pressure starts to build up that we have to have some kind of a career, a degree, a steady, well-paid job, status(?), then we choose a college according to these expectations, and maybe we still have intentions to make a difference, to achieve something, or not. Then when we get our first job its just a relief that we could fit in, you can earn money, and save up for a car or whatever meaningless sh*t, and most people don't really care about that maybe what they are doing isn't make a lot of sense. Than the time just goes on and one day you wake up as a 40-50 year old and you don't understand where have your dreams gone... well you wanted to make a difference... and boom mid-life crisis.
The trap: you have a family to take care of, bills to pay, maybe depts, you can't just quit, and chase your dreams right? So the solution: alcohol, a new car, a mistress, whatever...
I think I've gone trough something similar, just as a 24 year old, I also choose the safe path, till I had a mental breakdown because of the meaninglessness of what I've done so far with my life. But I'd like to believe that it is never too late to change this, even if it means financial insecurity and maybe you have to disappoint others.

In many parts of the United States and Canada, a car is an absolute necessity, not a luxury.