Have you or anyone you know been raped?...

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No, you want a girl to throw herself at you. It's very different.

A woman raping a man would be doing what she could to make him frightened and make him hurt. That's what rape is -- it's about having power over someone else and making them afraid and hurting them. Sex is used as a tool for that end but rape is about more than just the sex. Rape is about destroying someone else and I have a hard time believing you want anyone to do that to you.

sadly yes 3 of my siblings when we was in foster care, not me. its 9 of us

I don't think anyone can destroy me. I'm not MrGlassMind.

So you really do want a woman to injure and frighten you? I just don't get that.

I'm going to say something that might offend some readers, but I think it is necessary so that MrDiamondMind will learn to be less flip about this issue...

MrDiamondMind jokingly says "I wish I would get raped. My a girl."

So, MrDiamondMind will be okay with someone drugging him at party (making him not remember anything) and having them insert phallic devices into his anus (the action will be done by a female). He wishes that he would wake up - knowing from pain and bleeding that he has been violated, but not aware of who. He may feel ashamed about this violation and not report it to the authorities.

Perhaps MrDiamondMind will be walking home and will be forced into a van. He will be held down by several assailants, punched and kicked until he vomits. A female assailant will roughly kick him in the genitalia and then simulate sex with him. Then another female assailant will use a phallic device and roughly insert it. MrDiamondMind will not know whether his assailants plan on killing him or not.

Does this sound like fun MrDiamondMind?

Rape is not "sex." Rape is an act of violence.

Please do not get the two concepts confused and try to have more sensitivity when commenting about serious issues.

Unless this has to do with how this affects AS-related issues, this should probably go into either the Adult or Women's Discussion folder.

And Canadian Rose is right, it's about power.

I fully agree with CanadianRose. http://www.fathermag.com/news/rape/spokane.shtml

I agree with you on both counts.

Have you or anyone you know been raped?...

Yes

Nuff Said .

I think MrDiamondMind was joking.

And, I'd hate to get raped. I do not know anyone who has been though. Sex is kinda' gross.

God, that poor man. It makes my rape seem like no big deal by comparison.

What you have described is an extreme form of rape. It can be a lot milder. It can be as mild as pressured into vanilla sex. The one I want executed on me doesn't have to be that light, but I didn't ask for your extreme example either. I guess what I would want is just for some girl to hold me down, be aggressive, ignore anything I have to say, and perform a normal act of sex on me. She could threaten me with a knife or something if she has to feel safe. As long as she doesn't cut me.
Also, I don't think I'm being insensitive to anyone. If anything you're being insensitive to me; I've never been sexual - not even close.

Whether you were originally joking or are now talking about rape fantasies, this is not the thread to do it.

But what you describe is not rape; it is a BDSM fantasy. By definition, wanting a girl to do those things -- and nothing more violent, painful, or dangerous -- is not rape. Rape is when something happens that you don't want.



Just because you're a virgin doesn't give you a special right to make light of traumatic crimes against others.

I assure you, as someone who has been raped, the kinky, titillating "rape fantasy" that some people have is much different than being actually raped. Rape fantasies are based on feeling needed, so much so, that the object of our lust can't contain him/herself. Actual rape is based on terrorism.

The rapist is only interested in hurting you, the sex is only incidental, it is being used as a weapon, just like a gun or a knife. In a fantasy fulfillment, we are all right and know that we will be safe. In a real rape, you don't know if the rapist will kill you or leave you with life-long injuries. It is only horrifying; there is lustful feeling on victim's part at all.

But this is where the guilt comes in; some victims wonder if they felt even the tiniest bit of enjoyment at all or if they asked for it somehow, and if they decide that either of those possibilities are at least a little true, then the victims begin to hate themselves, which adds emotional anguish to the physical injuries.

The thought of being ravished might understandably be a turn-on, but real rape is nothing but a terrible experience in every way.