Accepting and Forgiving Previous Screwups

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androbot01
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02 Nov 2016, 5:56 pm

cathylynn wrote:

Shahunshah wrote:

androbot01 wrote:

Shahunshah wrote:

Have you ever considered moving from where you currently are, it looks like you consider your neighborhood to be quite dangerous.

I do (well, just the building - the neighbourhood is in transition) and I would, but things are in the process of changing. The building is scheduled for massive renovation and dealers never stay anywhere long.

What about the neighbor who owns the cat however?

i thought they were one and the same with the drug dealer.

They are. Girl's in a bit of a mess. She cries a lot.
Haven't seen the cat, but it was brought up in another thread that he might be chipped.

Shahunshah
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03 Nov 2016, 2:57 am

androbot01 wrote:

cathylynn wrote:

Shahunshah wrote:

androbot01 wrote:

Shahunshah wrote:

Have you ever considered moving from where you currently are, it looks like you consider your neighborhood to be quite dangerous.

What about the neighbor who owns the cat however?

i thought they were one and the same with the drug dealer.

They are. Girl's in a bit of a mess. She cries a lot.
Haven't seen the cat, but it was brought up in another thread that he might be chipped.

Well some things are worth a bit of a risk. If you succeed in this you will be able to take the cat to new loving home.

Shahunshah
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04 Nov 2016, 5:32 am

Hey Androbot have you seen the cat since when you last spoke?

androbot01
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04 Nov 2016, 10:19 am

Shahunshah wrote:

Hey Androbot have you seen the cat since when you last spoke?

I haven't seen him since last I mentioned. It's possible he has taken off and found another home.

The girl is in real trouble. I think she is being coerced by a larger group of dealers.

I've been thinking about my previous screwups and I am slowly seeing how my past behaviour has been effected by my mental processes. I know it's not politik to say but the medications I am taking allow me to see the flaws in my previous thinking.

Shahunshah
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04 Nov 2016, 10:37 am

androbot01 wrote:

Shahunshah wrote:

Hey Androbot have you seen the cat since when you last spoke?

I probably should have said this before but I think now, calling the cops may be warranted. It looks like the situation has become very serious.

As for the medications I think that is highly possible. For me when I was less clotted by negative thinking I was better able to be reflective and see how my thoughts were flawed.

androbot01
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04 Nov 2016, 10:46 am

Shahunshah wrote:

]I probably should have said this before but I think now, calling the cops may be warranted. It looks like the situation has become very serious.

Well, I talked to a Sergeant already because I am sure I spotted two wanted people, but they've moved on now. Anyway, as I was discussing it with him, he told me that the girl across the hall is known to them as is her violent boyfriend. The Sergeant said the landlord knows and is taking steps to get rid of them. He said to call 911 if I feel threatened and I thought I was going to have to last night. There must have been 5 guys over there fighting and talking about getting guns. All quiet so far today though. They are more active at night. I must say that this is an interesting study in human behaviour.

kraftiekortie
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04 Nov 2016, 10:48 am

It's a fine education, indeed......

androbot01
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04 Nov 2016, 10:52 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

It's a fine education, indeed......

The funny thing is that I'm not scared. I actually kind of like my place (except for the mold.) I do worry about the cat.
The whole thing is temporary as they will start building and renovating soon. If this becomes a decent building, with this location, if I can get a new unit at the same rent, that would be awesome.

Shahunshah
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04 Nov 2016, 12:00 pm

androbot01 wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

It's a fine education, indeed......

Me too. I find their is often an element of drama which I do enjoy. I can't stand to see people mistreated however.

Eclipse247
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06 Nov 2016, 1:19 pm

I know how you feel re. screwups. I'm now reviewing past actions and working on remedies but its a mountain to climb for me.

androbot01
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06 Nov 2016, 1:29 pm

Eclipse247 wrote:

I know how you feel re. screwups. I'm now reviewing past actions and working on remedies but its a mountain to climb for me.

What sort of remedies are you thinking of?

Eclipse247
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19 Nov 2016, 7:21 am

Avoiding repetition, acknowledging screwups, recognising poor executive function, asking others opinions regarding major decisions, stepping outside of any false self that reacts to NT behaviour, learning to love self and beware of reasons for Aspie screwups, don't use alcohol to reduce anxiety (use chamomile), learn more about AS, harness AS as a positive rather than let it screwup my life any more than it has for the last 10-12 years of burnout fallout, be aware that NT's are not in the habit of offering good advice or support unless asked, be aware of object blindness whether physical or emotional ie be aware of the elephant in the room whether it be good or bad (not easy). Acknowledge there is a higher power and look out for synchronicity to guide you. Google Jung and synchronicity if you don't know what it is.

Theodiskaz
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19 Nov 2016, 2:06 pm

androbot01 wrote:

but I can't seem to forgive myself for my past behaviour and experiences.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Yes. I had a sort of epiphany 6 years ago when I realized what I curse I had been upon my family. I forgave myself as a necessary first step to not suiciding. Everyone I asked gave me permission, all the people I'd hurt, which I felt little inclined to take. I had to be convinced, and usually no one persuades me to change my mind about anything, unless I want to. And I didn't want to. The idea was that I would now have the opportunity to become a blessing in their lives, if I forgave myself, stopped crying, and crawled out of my room. The epiphany made me want to die, but I did it. I hopefully forgave myself.

Do it. It's a good big picture, long term move for you to make, in my opinion. Be encouraged.

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androbot01
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19 Nov 2016, 2:59 pm

Theodiskaz wrote:

...Do it. It's a good big picture, long term move for you to make, in my opinion. Be encouraged.

I try not to let the memories bother me. I try to keep moving forward in a positive direction.

MaxE
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24 Nov 2016, 1:59 pm

androbot01 wrote:

...Were you in South Frontenac? It's gorgeous out that way.

I had to Google the definition of "South Frontenac" but when I see that it's basically everything to the immediate North of Kingston, yes that's where we were. An insane number of lakes and shockingly remote in places considering it is closely surrounded by dense population centers. One place we stopped was Westport. I saw some boats from Montreal there. I believe it's possible to sail there all the way from Montreal, via Ottawa, which is an amazing concept (of course these were motor boats not sailboats). You would be amazed how ignorant most of us are of that area, most knowledge ending at the border.

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androbot01
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24 Nov 2016, 2:33 pm

Yes that's the place...lot's of lakes. I've not been as far as Westport but I hear it's lovely. The river is part of the Rideau Canal system. People spend a lot of time traveling it in the summer.
There's a lot of neat little villages and shops spread around the area. Lovely place to spend the warm weather. I don't know if you passed through Sydenham, but I worked at the Public Library there a few years back.

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