Have you or anyone you know been raped?...

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Hi Tim.
I am writing the moderator and seeing if this whole thread can be placed in the Adult or Women's section.

I know that my original response was graphic. I am not trying to hurt people with my words - only enlighten so that the seriousness of the issue is made clear.

I'm lucky - I have been safe from this horror for almost 40 years. I have had the privilege of hearing the feelings and stories of others who weren't so lucky and feel a need to validate them by not tolerating jokes about the subject.

Anyways, hopefully the whole thread can either terminate or be moved.

Dots:

Same here, being molested for most of my childhood plus other abuse made me terrified of any emotion, trust, and physical contact for years. Finding out about the aspergers made me understand more.

As far MrDiamondMind, you're really being an inconsiderate jerk. To post about this stuff is hard enough, and to have you come in here posting BS like that is out of line. You don't need to be in here, so stfu.

Last edited by spooky13 on 27 May 2010, 7:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't think it's the rape itself, I think it's fact people feel isolated and ashamed as a result. Kind of like alien contactees...

-THIS FREAKING THREAD IS IS THE WRONG PLACE.

Imo, I just think it could of been in "The Heaven", that's where alot of gruesome topics seems to end up.

Its the "Haven", I don't think its really Heaven in that thread.

Anyway, I don't know of anyone who has been raped but that is probably because I am not a close friend of anyone so no one would tell me about this stuff.

My neice was and I often wonder if I was as a toddler or young child and just don't remember it. My biological mother was as well and I was the result of that rape.

OK......................................

What is Like!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Like laying down

in a highway

with a baseball bat

crammed in your A55

Watching the Onlookers

As They slow to WATCH

Meanwhile, a couple of people

who have stopped, cram it even further

after laying there bleeding for quite a while

you begin to notice that everyone else has a smile

and you wonder if you deserve to life or even want to

More details upon request - if you don't like analogies, and you REALLY want to know what it's LIKE - I would Highly suggest not trying to find out for yourself until you are 100% certain that suicide is the best answer.

Greetings, this thread was moved upon request. If anyone feels it is in the wrong forum then speak up.

Thank you......sorry about the previous post

Never been raped, though there were some threatening, homoerotic moments long ago.

In any case I would rather be the victim than the onlooker or friend. The wrath is too much for me to bear from a distance. It shuts me down if I can't get close to the offender. My breath feels hot and heavy, and my teeth and my fingers itch. I can't keep my back up, nor my shoulders down. My eyes scathe.

All I really know from the rape victims I've met is the ones who receive help (tell people) are much better off than the ones who hide it...

Working with vulnerable adults I come across a number of cases of rape within families, rape within step families, nearly always involving involve the vulnerable person of the family. People with disabilities and autism forced into prostitution, their pimps would even setup that they were the next of kin when such a person was sectioned and continue to pimp them out on the street under the guise of "taking them out for the day"

It gives you an immensly low opinion of men. I simply don't relate to that kind of desire to brutalise, destroy and humiliate women. It's a deeply embodied and disturbing kind of mysoginy that seems to be present in a significant proportion of the population.

You are assuming that women are incapable of doing the same to boys, but that is NOT true.

Yes. Not by especially violent assault, though. I was passing-out drunk in the wrong place (being stupid and very, very naive) at the wrong time.

What annoys me most is remembering that not too long before, I'd read an article in the student paper headlined "men get raped too" and found it amusing, because I was an idiot. And perpetually questioning my own culpability, which was decidedly non-zero; I wanted sex, because I was a very frustrated and depressed virgin at the time; what I got was a painful f*****g against such wishes as I could manage through a very drunken haze. I do, at least, remember saying "no." I also remember being slightly pleased that at least I wasn't a friggin' virgin anymore (and this despite bleeding for many days and generally being a bit odd in the head). It took me a long time to get angry about it.

*sigh* What he did was wrong, but - unlike, I trust, the majority of cases - I did invite it. Through my own stupidity and naive ignorance. Ambivalence, that's me.

For comic irony, though, in order of physical-only painfulness from least to worst, as experienced by Yours Truly:

ABH (having my head repeatedly stamped on).
Rape.
Testicular surgery.
The headaches I get on a semi-regular basis. It's like a nail in the side of the head. I'm so glad the medication works!

*sigh* What he did was wrong, but - unlike, I trust, the majority of cases - I did invite it. Through my own stupidity and naive ignorance. Ambivalence, that's me.

No, you did not "invite" anything.

I don't care if you were passed out, unconscious from purposefully drinking yourself into a stupor and wearing a t-shirt and underpants that read "DO ME" in large print letters. If you are drunk - you are not giving consent. If you utter "no" whether sober or drunk - you are not giving consent. If you are not giving consent and someone has sex with you or sexually touches you - it is sexual assault which is a crime.

Everyone makes stupid choices and is naively ignorant at some point in their life - this is not an invitation to sexual assault.

My own dear husband would NEVER initiate sex or sexual touching with me if I was passed out or high (not that I make a habit out of drinking that much or using drugs). This is my HUSBAND for #&%$ sake. He knows that I am pretty much a "sure thing" when it comes to consenting for sex as we have been married for close to 7 years! Notwithstanding my past consents and the fact that we live in the same house, share the same bed and are married - my husband would not assume that it is okay to have sex with me when I am not able to consent!! !! !! ! For a complete stranger or an acquaintance to take advantage in this way is morally, ethically and legally wrong.

Last edited by CanadianRose on 29 May 2010, 10:27 am, edited 1 time in total.