I have been quite depressed recently and I'm thinking about moving out, as I think it might make me feel better.
I get very bored, as my parents basically do everything for me, and I study part-time home, and work part-time 2 days a week. I can't do much more as I get stressed out easily, which is why I had to stop studying full time. So I thought if I had to live by myself then I would be forced to do things, like washing, looking after the dog, etc, which would give me a sense of purpose and relieve my boredom. It would perhaps be better for me in general to learn how to live independently.
My parents are also very religious, but I am not... and I haven't plucked up the courage to tell them, as I'm afraid they will be very disappointed in me. You see, they think I am their "miracle child" as they were told they could not have children before they had me.. of course, the obvious explaination is the the doctors were wrong, which they frequently are in matters of fertility (presumably it's hard to predict). I think if I told them I didn't believe that they would see it as a huge betrayal. So I thought if I didn't live with them anymore that I would be free to be myself and not feel under so much strain to pretend to be something I'm not. I'm also gay, which is in conflict with their religious beliefs.
The trouble is I feel guilty and conflicted thinking about moving out, as I love my parents but, as I mentioned above, I think there are some good reasons why I sould move out. I know it generally has to happen some time, but I hate to think it's to "get away" from them. If anyone has any words of wisdom, they'd be greatly appreciated.
12 Aug 2010, 11:55 am
