Career hit a brick wall

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When I was in high school in the 1980's I took all the high school courses leading up to University entrance into computer science. I took Universtiy entrance math, physics, electronics, and computer science. When I graduated from high school in 1988, I was refused entry into the faculty of science at University on the basis of poor math marks.

I drifted through 5 years of part time University towards an Arts degree that led nowhere while trying to support myself from an early age. (I left home at age 17). Eventually poverty meant I had to find work at whatever I could find and I never completed the degree.

I eventually 'drifted' into the trucking industry. I've worked in various roles; customer service, customs clerk, billing, rating, warehouse worker, truck driver, dispatcher. I worked at 5 different trucking firms but nothing ever took. I've now been out of work for 20 months and despite my best efforts, this 'career' has hit a brick wall, I can't progress or advance in the field.

I still spend alot of time, as a hobby interest, on the computer and on the internet. I have the thought of going back to the place in life where I made the wrong turn, and pursue a career in computer technology instead of continuing in trucking.

Still, I'm 39 with 3 kids to bring up. Two of them are handicapped. (One is a 21 year old infirm adult). Starting over is not a preferred choice. I don't know what I would be able to accomplish in the 26 years or so of 'working' life I have left till I'm old?

I feel intense regret for making the wrong choices, while I know at the same time I could have made all the right choices and stepped off the curb one day and been hit by a bus. If I made different choices I wouldn't have my wife and kids, I could be six feet under by now. Their is too much pain to consider all the 'what if's'.

When I was young, I was enthusiastic, energetic, and ambitious. I am none of those things now. Now I am bitter, full of regret, and wallowing in a pit of despair. Having an invisible handicap of Aspergers myself hasn't helped. I don't know what to do next.

you could try a technical degree to start with.


there are AS degrees that have a 'path' to a bachelors if you want to do so later on.

depending on your skill level and ease of learning you can get an AS in a year if you go full burn on it and that should help you land a job in something related to that field.


another choice is to work for the gov.

they have good pay and excellent benefits.. which from what I read here is something that would be useful to you.

Why not try the post office or some of the more less-heard of gov. agencies?

http://www.usajobs.gov/

you could even do both. many gov. agencies are very flexible if you're re-training & going to college for it. heck some will even pay the tuition too.

Good luck

You have to chill out my friend, it wont come to you when your in that mind state, a new interest will come along out of the blue and hit you like a ton of bricks!
I'm 34 and i've worked 11 trades so far and that's including truck driving!
My dad owned a trucking company and i pretty much grew up in the garage
I spent a couple years on the road hauling lumber on the east coast of canada until i got bored
i was working in the computer industry before that , jumped into management for a time after the trucking(djing at the club on the weekends )
then it was lineman work the cable company(4 years) then music industry for up until now.
I had side work during all of that, ran a paintball field, for a bit , the list goes on man, you just have to stay positive and an answer will find you!
right now i'm waiting for the next interest to take hold..
Asperg's can pretty much do well at anything they take interest in as long as they can control the emotional roller coaster they got going on inside them.
With everything i've done so far, i still sit back and think about what i missed because i didnt keep my cool

Hey..

I know how you feel. I'm in very much the same boat as you - except I am 32. Like you, one of my children is disabled (she has autism - I am "autism with and asperger presentation" - whatever that means.....)...

And, like you, my career has seemed to hit a brick wall...

But, as the others have said, no matter how bad things are and how much you feel like getting down on yourself, don't...

For me, I've just got myself into an employment agency that works solely with those with a disability, so I'm hoping that they'll help me get into a job I actually want to have and help me actually KEEP and PROGRESS in it...we'll see....

Maybe that is an option for you (not sure they have agencies in America that help diasbled people get work, I live in Australia)....it's worth looking at anyway...

Joel

maybe you are in the wrong line of work.
In my youth I took whatever job I could get. Newspaper saleperson, fast food, retail, transportation, etc. until I got into laboratory work. I have found that the structure and clearly defined set of rules has enabled me to advance in this environment.
However I have found that the "brick wall" is myself. I have a difficult time with change. I get comfortable with my current position and have to be forced into taking on new interests. For example, about 5 years ago I had to learn about Biodiesel. Now they call me the Biodiesel guru.

I can't remember how many jobs i've had. My head would explode if i tried to think how many i've applied for. Back when i had energy and enthusiasm being interviewed didn't worry me too much, although the myriad rejections didn't help my self-esteem any.
I've actually only ever passed one interview panel. The handful of contracts i now have were procured by phone, and along with the drought affected farm occasionally provide me with a subsistence level income.

I dream of earning half the poverty line.
Unfortunately. being a subcontractor means i fall into the gaps of centrelink ( Australian social security) . Apparently because i earned $145 a week last year theyre willing to pay me $0.00 a fortnight to look for work, and i'll have to jump through all their hoops just to get a discount on my meds.

Career path?....careering toward oblivion...the wall i'm approaching is eleven million tons of basalt.

You're kidding me...

I earnt WAY over 145 a week at one of my previous jobs, and that never stopped me from claiming newstart...

Surely Centrelink could pay you newstart while you're looking for work??

Also, have you ever been for a Job Capacity Assessment? Are you signed up with a disability employment service? It sounds like you need to get onto one, as your corrent situation will only serve to pull you further down the abyss - at least if you have a disability jobsearch agency behind you giving you the support you actually need it'll be a huge leg up for you...