Parents need help

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Aargh.

Yesterday, my dad disappeared. He has health problems and is very stubborn about refusing medical care. He's always been kind of strange and obsessive, but I think it's beginning to shade into dementia. My mom has been flaky lately and not entirely rational. It seems like he hasn't been receiving proper care from her, but then again, he could be in terrible pain and still insist he doesn't need a doctor. I know it's the right thing to step in and take care of him, but I have a long history of getting very anxious and depressed whenever family problems flare up. I just started at a new college and I want to graduate. I don't have the money to get him a nurse, and his last nurse quit because he's so stubborn. I also depend on him to provide my housing. I have 3 older brothers who could help, but I feel ashamed that this is happening on my watch.

It's time to get your brothers involved. Do they know about all this yet?
Tell them. Email them if you don't like the phone.
Call a conference with them. And then go together and talk to your mother; ask her what she wants to do about all this.

Take care of mom first, since you know where she is.
Also since getting your dad back and putting him back into a 'flaky' home isn't going to be positive.
You need to solve mom (with your brothers' help) and once the home/ nest is fixed, brring dad back to it.