Alcohol and AS

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i drink, quite a bit in fact, and often; but then again im Irish. i feel more like myself once i have a few beers and a whiskey or two in me, like i can set aside the mask i wear all throughout the day to blend in with the NTs. i only drink at night, before i go to bed (unfortunatly this has become part of my daily routine, i cant sleep unless i have a few drinks), or for a special occassion.

i spend most of my intellect throughout the day analysing facial expressions and tones of voice to figure out people's emotions, but after ive downed a few i find that i can think better and freer. i often have some of my best ideas when i am slightly buzzed, no joke. i feel i can let it all go and be the true me once im slightly sloshed.

what im wondering as i write this is simple: how do all of you is AS land think of that drug known as Alcohol? do you use it? if not, why? how do you feel once youve had a few drinks? am i the only one that uses it to pry the mask from off my face and relax as myself?

i can pre-empt one reply, of course; i am probably an alcoholic, but i dont care. i enjoy it, and i dont allow my proclivity for drink to effect my life. i dont drive once i drink, i dont hang around children, i dont hit people, and on only rare occassions do i become fall down, vomitous drunk.

I used to feel this way. I would have to drink in order to be comforatable around people. I got ill due to some other problems and drinking wasn't really an option anymore. I did drink now and then but it was sort of like a limbo state where I felt I was damaging myself in order to fit in with people who were directionless. I did try not drinking an going out. It was impossible as I am sure you are aware.

I now do not drink at all, maybe the odd glass of wine, but I feel stronger and my own personal (not national) identity has come through stronger than before. I felt personally that I was damaging myself just to fit in & I was right. I am quite happy in my own company though, maybe at first I was not. The drink was sort of a fuzz over reality for me. Yes it helped me fit in, but what was I fitting into?

Hope your find your optimum area

I don't drink at all. My thoughts on the subject would take an extremely long time to try to articulate.

I have a love-hate relationship with alcohol. It obscures the world, which for me is a positive. But every time I drink I feel poisoned the next day. And if I drink too often my psych beats me with a rake while chanting "maladaptive coping mechanism *thwap maladaptive coping mechanism *thwap*...."

I have been using alcohol for a few years as a way of sealing the day. I don't drink every day because it makes me feel bad after a couple of nights drinking. But I think it is a nasty drug that does more physical harm than it gives mental relief. But it is nice if it can be done in moderation. My problem is that if I have a night of drinking it is a proper night of drinking in that I empty a good part of a bottle of rum. It makes me sharper and more focused for a while but then makes me delerious as I drink more. I do like crashing into bed though. Having a joint on top of a nights drinking makes me crash like never before.

I drank every day for 25 years. Most of the time it was great. It didn't solve my problems; it just "disolved" them. I would forget to feel like I didn't fit in. But the last couple years were more like a contest with the bottle. Am I going to avoid it or drink it today? I'm going to drink it? Okay, am I going to just have a little, or am I going to finish the bottle? I finished the bottle? Okay, am I going to stop there, or am I going to go get another? Gee, I can't walk to go get another, so let's see what else I can find around the house...

Now I don't drink, and I'm back to feeling like the same dork I was from age 2 to age 18. The only thing that helps is finding other people like me to be around so I don't feel so conspicuous.

If alcohol still worked, I would still be drinking.

I rarely drink and when I do, I'm either at home or out camping. I use alcohol to reduce my symptoms - it generally quiets the voices in my head and seems to desensitize my skin.

Hi all

I was a habitual, daily drinker, every night, in my own home, alone. To turn off from work and to get to sleep. Rarely hung over, rarely drank socially, half a bottle of post most nights along with a few beers and maybe wine.

I am not an alcoholic in terms of having the disease. If anyone is unsure I suggest going to a closed AA meeting - you only need to recognise that you have a problem with alcohol to attend and you absolutely do not have to say or do anyting other than sit and listen.

What I was, was a compulsive habitual heavy drinker. And it was certainly a coping mechanism for frustration at Aspergers and stress at work. I still drink but now I just have less and I wait longer and longer before having that first drink. I buy less quantity and better quality. I only drink port on special occasions and make it a treat, all mental tricks to put me in control and to just manage it better. When I drink, even a glass of wine, I feel more in control and feel more self esteem so if it's self medication, so be it.

bathtub

I have the same problem. I try never to drink and it's wokred but at the same time the pain is still there. I don't like talking much abou it on this forum since there's this weird stigma attached to it. Everytime I've brought this subject up, I get people who tell me what a bad person I am and why it isn't something that should be treated but rather willed. I grew up from an alcoholic home and my dad told me he use to have the same trouble whenver he drank. He had an excuse for everything. My grandfather was the same way. Both of them were very smart but never able to keep a job.

I'm a little worried now. I've been sober for a long time but I have to admit, when I drink, I drink. I don't understand it and I don't expect anyone else to. If I ever continue I will always not die happy. I use to want to die thinking it was an escape, I realize now it would effect many ppl and lol my pets.

I'm probably just "borderline aspie" anyway, but I enjoy having a few drinks with friends occasionally, it makes me feel pretty much entirely NT. Communication becomes so much easier. I have been told that I become very clever and witty...I think when I'm sober I still have some of that wit but don't have the ability to share it.

So, yeah, I use it to relax and be able to be more what I think of as my true self, i.e. me without the inhibition or awkwardness.