Socialisation and Socialability?

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I have come to the conclusion that I am for all intents and purposes asocial.
By this I mean that I am indifferent to any need/aversion with regards social interactions.

Sometimes I will get mild enjoyment from other peoples company yet seldom feel more 'charged' than 'drained' and the likelyhood that interactions will overstimulate and tire me has led to a mild aversion particularly with regard personalitys with a poor track record. I just don't feel 'needy of people/ social stimulation however I enjoy non human company immensely and read about people constantly.

Prior to diagnosis I felt obliged and forced myself to be social even though I wasn't nessasarily interested in socialising, I therefore chose to do it through distractive media, bands, raves, boardgaming, anything but 'intimate' environments. I used to abuse drugs and alchahol to try and facilitate some sense of pleasure from human company.

Now I have spent a couple of years coming to understand my aspergic self I have become comfortable with my solitary self, alone not lonely.

Please do not confuse antisocial with asocial they are quite different, I do have social interactions it is just that I am aware of my indifference to them. I attempt at all times to be diplomatic, pleasant and helpfull and do things to contribute to my community on occaisions, charity christmas dinner, community gardens and similar things

My only concern is that from a human evolution perspective this is an entirely unsuccessfull mode as a solitary primate is easy prey, particularly homo sapiens/homo domesticus. Did ASD's exist prior to 'modern' humans [homo domesticus]?

Just some thoughts, I was wondering if this is a common experience/mode for ASD people.

peace j

I know what you mean. I classify myself more or less as an ambivert. I really just don't care much. some days social activity drans me and lone time charges me, other days its vice versa, and even weirder yet are days where either both charge or drain me. More recently though I have been debating the fact that I may be much more extroverted than I thought for whatever reason though, so I dunno.

Discovering oneself is a lifelong journey.

I am asocial. I don't dislike people, I just don't need to be around them to feel complete.

It took me awhile to pick the one that best describes me, and I ended up voting as genuinely enjoying human company, though for me that means a select limited group of people, my wife, our children, and the few close friends I maintain.

Beyond these few I'm hopeless, and even if it is a person I really like, that doesn't mean I want to spend time with them outside of the designated times I must be around them. Keeping up even with the limited people that I do, it is draining for me, and I get so anxious when someone invites me to do something outside of the right context, and worry about keeping our plans, I just end up saying no or making up excuses. The people I do have close to me, know that when I say yes, that I need to be reminded and not that I'm disinterested, but that i'm exceedingly difficult LOL.

I am a very solitary person, but the few people that I can let into my life with keeping the stress manageable, are truly my anchor in this world and keep me from floating away. They give the meaning, they are the context for me, and the fact that they put up with me is more than a miracle

Asocial - I can identify with a significant part of the OP.

If I understand correctly what you have in mind when you say human evolution, that will take its course with or without you and me. You'll find isolated or extremely introverted people through the course of history, I don't think I'm easier pray than a scholar several centuries ago. Someone usually protected people like that, but these days I have more means to protect myself.

I'm not concerned about not contributing in a traditional way or about not passing on my genes. I do things that benefit others and I've created things that will outlive me. Even from a "bigger picture" POV my existence will have some sort of significance. I wish I could say the same about what I see as the "duty" I have to myself as a human being, but I still have a long way to go. In solitude

Social/asocial/antisocial is a bit general, though asocial is probably closest. Truth is for me it depends on the type of people and how much energy I have. I quite like being surrounded by fellow nerds (NT or AS) and am willing to stay in that company even though I feel a bit tired. Same if I feel I'm welcome in a specific crowd (not pity welcome) because I'm liked or my opinion valued equally. Whereas your stereotypical jock/fashionistas crowd just doesn't interest me in the slightest.

As much as I like to be social with the crowds I value I also just don't have the energy for as much of it. The noise and confusing social interactions usually means I get tired faster since I have to spend more energy than they do just to keep up. When tired most people, AS or NT, just aren't as up to socializing. I'd feel fine right up until a break point where I'll get a splitting headache, get irritable and frustrated and snap at someone. Not even realizing I was completely exhausted until I was away from the situation for long enough that my mind could relax enough to receive my body's "REST! NOW!" message. Now I try to be a bit more pro-active in preventing that like making sure I'm not hungry, thirsty or tired before I have to do social stuff and then excuse myself if I start to find myself get more distracted or if I notice the lights and sounds are feeling a bit brighter or louder.