Advice about my father

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Hello everyone,

Forgive me if this is in the wrong place, but I tried to find the one most suited.

I just wanted to talk with people, to gather some advice relating to my father, and please forgive my naiveness on the subject at times...

My father has been suffering with depression for a number of years now, and has been on cocktails of drugs to try and level out his behaviour. He is in his late 50s now and for as long as I remember has been on some form of medication long before him and my mother divorced.

The reason I am here is because for years I have always suspected his behaviour to fall in-line with the common characteristics of Asperger's, but I am often ignored when mentioning this to doctors & other family members.

I am worried really that his prolonged exposure to anti depression and sleeping drugs is or has already had a lasting effect on him.

Over the past few months he has started self harming, and talking about 'wanting it to end', we don't what else to do.

I just wondered if anyone else has experience of misdiagnosis? or am I just looking in the wrong places?


Many thanks

Stephen

I'm sorry to hear that your dad is having such difficulty -- and has been for so long.

What makes you think this may be somehow related to Asperger's, though? What are the characteristics you've identified?

To answer your question, yes, I have experience with misdiagnosis. Lots of "older" people (in which group I count myself) do. I've been medicated for depression and anxiety for ***years***. Now that AS has entered the picture (so far I'm "on the spectrum" without a final diagnosis), the old psychiatrists and therapists are starting to say, "hmmm... now I'm starting to see you in a different light -- maybe you really don't have maternal separation issues." My hope is that behavioral therapy might replace all or some of the meds, as I've always thought that doctors were treating the effects of whatever it was and not the cause(s).

It is very common for people your Fathers age to be Misdiagnosed or undiagnosed. Although I have no way of Knowing if that is true for your Father. It's what happened to me.

The higher functioning types of autism were only recognised in the early 1990s so this means that most people over the age of 40 have been missed.
1 in 110 are thought to be on the spectrum so that means there are 100s of thousands of people in this situation in the UK.

There are only a handful of specialist adult assessment centres in the UK.

A recent NHS report has highlighted the situation and as a result many PCTs have a blanket policy of not funding assessments for adults. So what help you can get for you father via the NHS depends on where you live.

This situation is compounded by the fact that many doctors do not like to admit to making a mistake. In the case of their Misdiagnosed Patients.

Having said that, you can fight for a specialist assessment for your father but of course he will have to want that too and agree that he may have AS..

You and your family may also be able to club together and pay for an assessment privately. It will probably cost between £1000 and £2000. Make sure it is a genuine place.

I hope you are able to find professionals to help you.

Welcome to wrong planet. You are most welcome here. I hope you will find it a useful resource. Your Father is Lucky to have You.

Whenever someone gets an AS diagnosis, the drug companies loose, so it may not be easy to rescue a regular customer, even from the point of suicide, which is a definite risk with prescription meds. You may have to fight the system pretty hard.
What saved me was the native cunning to change my behaviour whenever a shrink seemed to be making up his mind about me, knowing that he was wrong, but not knowing what the real problem was. Falling through the cracks was safer than mistreatment.