After I had my living arrangement predictability shaken a week ago, I've been stuck in limbo. Currently I don't even have a vehicle that runs so that I'd be able to get out and think. As it stands I can either go back to my mercurial mother's where my 'life' is and be subject to all the associated triggers in addition to agreeing to some sort of 'good boy' contract, or I can stay at my dad's and have to pack away all of my special interests and have the same external 'rude NT people' triggers but have a decent family relationship, even if I catch him treating me like a child at times.
If I do stay here I'll have to navigate the bureaucracy of changing health insurance, doctors, social security, and bank account. Then I'll have to go to my mother's to collect my stuff, where the real anxiety is for me. Then if I do follow through, the house will be foreclosed (been barely hanging onto it as it is) and everyone else ends up looking for a place to live. I'm just feeling so stuck, I have a client I've already got on the plate, more people are beginning to call for service and I can't bring myself to return any calls,as much as I want to help them. I just hate this
22 May 2012, 2:43 pm
