balance between jerk & pushover

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How does one come across firm yet pleasant?
I had an issue with my child's school recently. I thought I had resolved it, but it has happened again.
As it regards safety, I cannot overlook it.
My child may be attending this school for several more years, and I don't want to be the "witch" parent, but I also don't want to be ignored.
This kind of situation seems to happen to me over and over.

I have come up with some "rules" for myself:
1 No yelling, name-calling, or threatening
2 State what happened
3 State how you feel about it
4 Give other person a chance to suggest solution. If no reasonable solution offered, suggest a solution.

These rules, I hope, keep me from being a jerk. I think, however, I may now be leaning toward being a pushover. What do you think / any advice?

Your rules are good ones. That's the right way to get your point across in a civil, yet effective manner.

Whether you are considered a jerk or not is more about how well someone likes you. The better they like you, the more demands you can get away with. If they don't like you, then even getting thier attention will annoy them.

The teacher is obligated to consider your concerns though, so who cares how you come off.

Hmmm, I don't know if it works with females but the way I do it is all in the way I bring it.
Passive agressive behaviour, intimidation, persuasion, dominance roles, charm, etc. are things you see into for future situations.
In essence humans are all like animals, very receptive for emotions to control them - be it their own and/or those of others.

All in all I can't really help you specifically since you are unclear on what's going on.

There's passive, assertive, and aggressive people. "Passive" ones think everybody else has all the rights, and they don't have any. "Assertive" ones think everybody has rights. "Aggressive" ones think they have all the rights and nobody else does.

That is a great way to summarize those -I need to work on assertiveness myself. I think I'm generally more passive aggressive.

Also, those seem like excellent rules YippySkippy ) I hope it works out for you and your kid(s).
If an issue isn't being resolved is there anybody else at the school that would be more receptive? My dad is a janitor at an elementary school and he will step in on behalf of the kids sometimes. I know he has gone around some people that didn't put the needs of the kids before their own pride (however, he had to do this carefully and quietly so he wouldn't get into too much hot water considering he has to deal with the teachers regularly and the simple fact that some look down on him because of his job).